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#Leadership : 6 Ways to Develop the Poise That Defines a Business Leader…By Definition, Poise is a Self-Confident Manner or Bearing that Offers Steadiness and Stability. It is Most often Indicated in a Particular Way one carries Himself or Herself, and it Can Make the Difference on Whether You are Respected as a Business Leader — or Not.

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Audrey Hepburn had it. Jacqueline Kennedy had it. Even Fred Astaire had it. They all had poise. And you can have it too.

young green plant in soil for agriculture, business growth or environment concepts (isolated on white background)

By definition, poise is a self-confident manner or bearing that offers steadiness and stability. It is most often indicated in a particular way one carries himself or herself, and it can make the difference on whether you are respected as a business leader — or not.

Poise is being aware of your surroundings and being flexible and adaptable. Poise is not something you are born with or can acquire overnight. It is something you must practice daily.

Here are a few ways you can cultivate poise.

1. Practice manners and etiquette.

First impressions count when meeting with someone. Stand tall and act confident (even when you don’t feel it). Give a firm handshake, offer an enthusiastic greeting and maintain eye contact. Always introduce yourself by saying your first and last name. If you forget someone’s name, don’t fret. Just say something like, “It’s been one of those days; please tell me your name again.”

Be mindful of how your behavior affects others and learn the proper etiquette of dining and socializing. People notice your manners, whether you are taking a co-worker to lunch, networking in a crowded room, negotiating a deal or simply interacting around the office.

Related: The Best 25 Motivational Quotes To Kick Start Every Morning

 

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2. Become a better communicator.

When speaking to a group, talk at a moderate speed with constant volume; avoid drops at the beginning or end of sentences and make eye contact with your entire audience. Use good grammar and avoid the use of “fillers” like “um” or “like.” If you aren’t comfortable speaking in public, take a course at a local university or joinToastmasters. This will be the best investment you make in yourself.

When speaking with others, become a thoughtful listener. Always choose your words carefully and think before you speak. Although it may be difficult at times, be patient and don’t be tempted to finish others’ sentences.

3. Keep your composure.

I once worked with a colleague who lacked composure and was always in a panic. Though he had an advanced degree and lots of talent, he was unable to remain calm and thus made all his co-workers feel uneasy. He was often needlessly dramatic about the smallest of problems. He couldn’t deal with crisis and change so he ended up quitting.

There will be times when you don’t agree with someone or things didn’t go as planned. Before you jump to conclusions, listen to what is being said. Before you get defensive or angry, assess the situation calmly. When others panic, a leader with composure takes a step back to connect the dots of opportunity within adverse circumstances. Your poise makes others feel safe, secure and comfortable in your presence.

Related: How Emotionally Brilliant Leaders Turn Envy Into Something Much More Beneficial

4. Become conversational in diverse subjects.

The best conversationalists are great storytellers well versed on topics far beyond their own business and industry. To acquire a well-rounded repertoire of conversational topics through books, magazines and trade journals and talk radio programs. They attend classes, go to cultural and sporting events and watch a variety of movie genres.

One of my mentors told me, “School is never out.” Take the opportunity to learn everything you can and you will feel more confident and be able to interact with anyone in business and social situations.

Related: She Built an App Without Knowing How to Code — and is Now a Millionaire

5. Focus on the positive.

Be thoughtful of others and look for how you can help whenever the need arises. When you help others, they want to help you in return. That’s the rule of reciprocity.

No matter how tempting, avoid office or workplace gossip. Be authentic, but don’t be an open book or spill your every emotion in words or on social media. Try to find the silver lining in all challenging situations. Unless a situation is life threatening, get over it and move on. Don’t sweat the small stuff

Overall, take pride in how you look, what you do, what you say. Do your best work each and every day. Brush up on your appearance and presentation skills. Consider yourself “on stage” any time you are around clients, employees, co-workers or anyone with whom you do business.

Your poise will elevate you in the eyes of those around you.

Author:  Jacqueline Whitmore – Author, Business Etiquette Expert and Founder of The Protocol School of Palm Beach

Entrepreneur.com | August 30, 2016

#Leadership : 7 Mistakes Leaders Make That Make Everyone Miserable…“Look for 3 Things in a Person: Intelligence, Energy, & Integrity. If they Don’t Have the Last One, Don’t even Bother.” –Warren Buffet

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From Enron to Volkswagen, we’ve watched in horror as leaders who lack integrity have destroyed businesses time and again. But the real tragedy happens when regular leaders, who are otherwise great, sabotage themselves, day after day, with mistakes that they can’t see but are obvious to everyone else.

Free- Locks

In most cases, it’s slight and often unintentional gaps in integrity that hold leaders, their employees, and their companies back. Despite their potential, these leaders harm their employees and themselves.

“Look for three things in a person: intelligence, energy, and integrity. If they don’t have the last one, don’t even bother.” –Warren Buffet

Dr. Fred Kiel did the difficult job of quantifying the value of a leader’s integrity for his book, Return On Character, and his findings are fascinating. Over a seven-year period, Kiel collected data on 84 CEOs and compared employee ratings of their behavior to company performance.

Kiel found that high-integrity CEOs had a multi-year return of 9.4%, while low integrity CEOs had a yield of just 1.9%. What’s more, employee engagement was 26% higher in organizations led by high-integrity CEOs.

Kiel describes high-integrity CEOs this way: “They were often humble. They appeared to have very little concern for their career success or their compensation. The funny point about that is they all did better than the self-focused CEOs with regard to compensation and career success. It’s sort of ironic.”

Kiel’s data is clear: companies perform better under the guidance of high-integrity leadership. “Companies who try to compete under the leadership of a skilled but self-focused CEO are setting themselves up to lose,” Kiel says.

Every leader has the responsibility to hone his or her integrity. Many times, there are integrity traps that have a tendency to catch well-meaning leaders off guard. By studying these traps, we can all sharpen the saw and keep our leadership integrity at its highest possible level.

1. Fostering a cult of personality. It’s easy for leaders to get caught up in their own worlds as there are many systems in place that make it all about them. These leaders identify so strongly with their leadership roles that instead of remembering that the only reason they’re there is to serve others, they start thinking, ‘It’s my world, and we’ll do things my way.’ Being a good leader requires remembering that you’re there for a reason, and the reason certainly isn’t to have your way. High-integrity leaders not only welcome questioning and criticism, they insist on it.

 

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2. Dodging accountability. Politicians are notorious for refusing to be accountable for their mistakes, and business leaders do it too. Even if only a few people see a leader’s misstep (instead of millions), dodging accountability can be incredibly damaging. A person who refuses to say “the buck stops here” really isn’t a leader at all. Being a leader requires being confident enough in your own decisions and those of your team to own them when they fail. The very best leaders take the blame but share the credit.

3. Lacking self-awareness. Many leaders think they have enough emotional intelligence (EQ). And many times, they are proficient in some EQ skills, but when it comes to understanding themselves, they are woefully blind. It’s not that they’re hypocrites; they just don’t see what everyone else sees. They might play favorites, be tough to work with, or receive criticism badly. And they aren’t alone, as TalentSmart research involving more than a million people shows that just 36% of us are accurate in our self-assessments.

4. Forgetting that communication is a two-way street. Many leaders also think that they’re great communicators, not realizing that they’re only communicating in one direction. Some pride themselves on being approachable and easily accessible, yet they don’t really hear the ideas that people share with them. Some leaders don’t set goals or provide context for the things they ask people to do, and others never offer feedback, leaving people wondering if they’re more likely to get promoted or fired.

5. Not firing poor performers. Sometimes, whether it’s because they feel sorry for an employee or simply because they want to avoid conflict, leaders dodge making the really tough decisions. While there’s certainly nothing wrong with being compassionate, real leaders know when it’s just not appropriate, and they understand that they owe it to the company and to the rest of the team to let someone go.

6. Succumbing to the tyranny of the urgent. The tyranny of the urgent is what happens when leaders spend their days putting out small fires. They take care of what’s dancing around in front of their faces and lose focus of what’s truly important—their people. Your integrity as a leader hinges upon your ability to avoid distractions that prevent you from putting your people first.

7. Micromanaging. You see this mistake most often with people who have recently worked their way up through the ranks. They still haven’t made the mental shift from doer to leader. Without something tangible to point to at the end of the day, they feel unproductive, not realizing that productivity means something different for a leader. As a result, they micromanage to the point of madness and fall off schedule. An important part of a leader’s integrity rests in giving people the freedom to do their jobs.

Bringing It All Together

The bad news is that these mistakes are as common as they are damaging. The good news is that they’re really easy to fix, once you’re aware of them.

Forbes.com | February 16, 2016 | Travis Bradberry