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#Leadership : 5 UnSpoken Rules of Being a #Manager that No One Tells You About…You’ll be on the Receiving End of More Information Than you Want. Use that Privilege Wisely.

After many hours of hard work, your employer made you a manager. For the first time in your life, you have several employees reporting to you. You’re excited to make your mark and take your career to the next level. And you should be–your company has recognized that you have leadership potential, and they’re giving you an opportunity to shine.

1) YOU’RE GOING TO BE IN THE SPOTLIGHT, SO USE IT WISELY

As a manager, you are either loved or hated, but never ignored. It can be an uncomfortable situation to be in, even if one of your goals is to be more visible to the company leaders and your team. When you are in the spotlight, people are watching you and forming opinions about you. That means they’re reading your words, actions, and gestures more closely than they were before.

To be clear, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. You do not need to change your personality or be a work martyr (in fact, doing so can hurt your performance.) You should, however, acknowledge the impact of your new powers, and see it as an opportunity to define your work culture.

For example, one of the authors of this article, Terra, is a single career mom. On Fridays, she’ll often have to leave for midday elementary school events. When she says to her team, “I’m leaving for Jake’s Halloween party at school, and I’ll be back in two hours,” she is telling them that she values work-life balance and family, and giving them implicit permission to do the same. If she is not upfront about where she needs to be, her team might not realize that it’s acceptable for them to leave work from time to time for family obligations.

Related: How I built a more intelligent work culture than me 


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2) YOU’LL HAVE MORE INFORMATION ABOUT YOUR COWORKERS THAN YOU WANT

You’ll also find that as you become the go-to source for complaints, you’ll hear things you never thought you would. You’ll listen to accounts of workplace dramas, or even allegations against one of your coworkers. You might also find that you’ll receive complaints about subject matters outside of the office. Employees will come to you about their personal troubles–from health issues to breakups.

As a manager, it’s not your job to solve all of your employees’ problems. There may be occasions when it’s appropriate for you to take charge of the situation, but other times you need to direct them elsewhere. The key is understanding which situation warrants what treatment. You might have to use trial and error to gain this insight, but just be aware that whatever actions you take can have a broad impact on the company.


Related: Stop trying to be friends with all your coworkers, and do this instead 


3) YOU’LL SPEND MORE TIME THAN YOU WANT ON LOW PERFORMERS

When you start managing people, you’ll distinguish your high performers from your low performers. If you’re not careful, you can spend far too much of your time on the latter. That’s why it’s important to identify whether their issues are a matter of capability, skills, or knowledge–and whether it’s something they can overcome. If you don’t think they can change (and you’ve given them plenty of opportunities to prove themselves), then you should think long and hard about whether you should keep them in your team. After all, the time that you’re spending on fixing that person’s mistake is the time you’re not spending developing (and empowering) your high performers.

However, if you believe that they can improve, think about incorporating “coachable moments” in your day-to-day interactions with them. These are on-the-job situations when you can offer feedback in real time. Mollie, for example, ensures that when she is explaining something to a new employee or a low performer, she can point to what a high performer in her team has done. This way, not only is she giving her star employees the recognition they deserve–she is steering her low performing employees towards becoming a high performer (rather than berating them for their mistakes.)


Related: This is the emotionally intelligent way to fire someone


4) YOU’LL BECOME THE DESIGNATED EXPLAINER

The job of the manager is to translate strategy into the day-to-day actions of their team. You’ll find yourself consistently reiterating the company’s strategy and goals, and explaining the connection between the two. At first, you think you’re fine with this arrangement; after all, you know the answers! Then one day it happens: no matter how often you’ve repeated the company’s new priorities–someone in your company still doesn’t get it and asks you to explain it for the millionth time.

Unfortunately, this is one job requirement you’ll just have to weather. And just as people will come to you bearing their personal problems, they’ll also ask questions that you might not know the answer to (for example, issues around HR and benefits.) As a manager, you should have enough knowledge of company policy to answer these questions at a high level, but if it’s something beyond your area of expertise–make sure that you direct their queries to someone who knows the answer.

5) YOU MIGHT FEEL ALONE FROM TIME TO TIME

Sometimes, being a manager means holding on to information that no one else can know, which can be isolating. Sometimes it means being at odds with other managers when it comes to resource allocation. And sometimes, you’ll face circumstances you never imagined you’d be in.

You might be tempted to share these information with your employees. That’s what you used to do, after all. But as managers, we know that at times, it’s in everyone’s best interest to keep specific information confidential. If you must talk about it to someone–try to find an external mentor that you trust. That way, you can maintain your composure at work without violating your obligations as a manager.

Being a manager involves a lot more than just taking on more responsibilities–in fact, it’s a whole new job in and of itself. By being aware of these five points, you can have a plan for tackling potential challenges before you face them. Just understand that there might be instances where you don’t get it right the first time, and that’s okay.


Terra Vicario is the chief marketing officer at Viventium–a cloud-based software and HR software solution. Mollie Lombardi is the co-founder of Aptitude Research Partners–an independent research-based analyst and advisory firm.  

 

FastCompany.com | August 8, 2018 | BY MOLLIE LOMBARDI AND TERRA VICARIO 5 MINUTE READ

#Leadership : True Grit: How My Team Learned To Thrive In The Face Of Adversity…Business is a Game of Dramatic Ups & Downs, Especially for Teams that are Trying to Create Something New or Bring about Meaningful Change in a Stagnant & Complacent Market.

It’s easy to feel a bit bipolar at times. Some days you’re on top of the world, and other days you’re just trying to stay alive. How a team manages these swings, and the periods of adversity in particular, is what separates successful businesses from failures.

Free- Stones stacked on each other

Every business encounters adversity. It’s one of the few constants that you can count on and it can be all too easy to allow these setbacks to get you down, discourage your efforts, and extinguish the fire that keeps you going. Good leaders recognize this fact but find the courage and wherewithal to help their teams avoid these pitfalls.

I’m not an expert on many things, but one area where I have plenty of experience is dealing with adversity. At BodeTree, my team and I have had our fair share of failures, strikeouts, and unfair situations. Despite these setbacks, however, we always keep moving forward. We’ve learned to use adversity to our advantage, and it all comes down to one trait: grit.

Remember that character is king

Grit is just another word for strength of character. An individual or team who displays grit is someone who can take a hit and just keep on going, no matter what. It’s this resilience that enables successful teams to avoid the pitfalls of depression, lethargy, and apathy that people tend to run into when faced with adversity. It may seem like grit is an innate virtue that people people either are born with or not, but this isn’t the case. Grit can be developed, just like any other skill.

Developing grit in yourself is difficult; trying to develop it in others is even harder. It takes equal parts understanding, compassion, and dedication. Over the years at BodeTree, I’ve learned that grit starts with intellectual honesty and the ability to face your fears. Leaders looking to foster gritty teams can start by fostering an environment of transparency and trust. When team members know how they’re being judged and what the expectations are, they’re more willing to be honest about shortcomings and face their fears. If team members feel as though their next mistake will be their last, anxiety sets in and people tend to crumble in the face of adversity. Leaders must create an environment that encourages grit and resilient thinking across the board.

 

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Turn anger and frustration into something productive

If you’ve developed a gritty team,  you can use adversity and challenges to your advantage. There are only two ways to handle bad situations; you can accept what happened and roll over, or you can get mad. I’ve found that turning the other cheek is rarely productive in business. Instead, I like to work to focus the collective anger and frustration of my team into something productive and transformational.

We’ve faced some difficult situations at BodeTree over the last few years, including deals and partnerships falling through at the 11th hour. The news can be devastating at first, but it can also be motivating. We’ve learned to let our feelings of self-pity give way to righteous indignation. We channel our anger into productivity and let it renew our passion to bring about change. For us, succeeding in our space is no longer a matter of business or strategy; it’s personal.

I’m fortunate to have such a dedicated and gritty team. The adversity we’ve faced could have derailed us, robbing the team of its drive and dampening our will to move forward. Lesser teams would have crumbled, but we’ve managed to turn adversity into an advantage. Our anger and resilience pushes us forward and gives us purpose. We’ve become a team hell-bent on advancing constantly, uninterested in anything short of total market dominance.

I hope that our experience can serve as an example for other teams. You will face adversity in your endeavors no matter what they are, that much is certain. Just remember that success isn’t determined by whether or not you encounter challenges, but rather by the way you respond to those challenges. Leaders of teams must work to developing grit, both in themselves as well as the people they lead. The resilience that results will enable individuals and teams to transform anger and frustration into a powerful motivator that can you forward, even in the most difficult of circumstances.

 

Forbes.com | February 15, 2016 | Chris Myers

 

 

Chris Myers is the Cofounder and CEO of BodeTree, a web application designed to help small businesses manage their finances.

#Leadership : How To Push Back (And Stop Being So Nice!)… Too Much Niceness can Become a Vice. Rocking the Boat Can Be Risky, But No Less than Being Too Agreeable.

I like Nice People. Who Doesn’t, Right? But, Like Every Virtue, Too Much Niceness can Become a Vice. Of course, Being Agreeable, Affable & Amenable is Often a Great Thing, helping you to Build Trusting & Rewarding Relationships. Likewise, no-one likes someone who is forever forcing their opinion, constantly argumentative and overly demanding. However, if you’re not willing to push back from time to time, you can find yourself feeling increasingly resentful, frustrated and not accomplishing what you want. Or to put it simply – rocking the boat can be risky, but no less than being too agreeable.

shooting-fingers-3

When I look back on the not-so-pleasant experiences in my career and life, on every single occasion I can identify where I held back from confronting an issue when I shouldn’t have because I was afraid someone might think I was being difficult, hard to get along with, uncooperative or pushy. I was trying to be a nice person—agreeable, easy to work with. Alas, I was trying too hard.

I like nice people. Who doesn’t, right? But, like every virtue, too much niceness can become a vice. Of course, being agreeable, affable and amenable is often a great thing, helping you to build trusting and rewarding relationships. Likewise, no-one likes someone who is forever forcing their opinion, constantly argumentative and overly demanding. However, if you’re not willing to push back from time to time, you can find yourself feeling increasingly resentful, frustrated and not accomplishing what you want. Or to put it simply – rocking the boat can be risky, but no less than being too agreeable.

If all you ever do is “go along to get along” you will sometimes diminish yourself and deprive others of the impact you would make by speaking up and putting forward your opinion, even if it ruffles the odd feather. Sure, there’ll be people who won’t always agree with you. Some may think you’re being a pain in the butt. Criticism and confrontation may ensue. However, in today’s workplace where “yes-men” are plentiful, those who are willing to speak their mind—courteously, but candidly—not only add more value, but become more valued by those around them. As Margaret Thatcher once said, “If you set out to be liked, you will accomplish nothing.”

There is both an art and a science to knowing how to push back without coming across as pushy. Here are a five ways to help you do just that.

Don’t Make People Wrong

If you’ve ever had someone challenge your opinion, even gently, you’ll have experienced how quickly it can raise your defenses, even when you know you aren’t being personally attacked. Likewise, if what you have to say may be threatening to others, be very clear in distinguishing between the opinion you’re pushing back against and the person who holds it.

When people perceive that you’re trying to put them down or lay blame, they instinctively go into combat mode. No one wins when either perceives that the other is out for blood. So instead of saying ‘yes, but …’, say ‘yes, and …’ The former may come across as combative while the latter acknowledges their view as valid and invites further discussion.

 

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Inquire Before Advertising

We all like to think our way of seeing things is the right way. So before you try to convince someone otherwise, take time to understand how they came to see things as they do. This moves you from advocating for your opinion to inquiring about theirs. When people sense you’re genuinely trying to understand their perspective, they become more receptive to yours.+

Start With What You Both Care About

Whether it’s a mutual concern for the bottom line or the state of your relationship, make sure you frame your opinion in the context of what you both care about. That way, people won’t see you as arguing against them as much as trying to work with them to create a better outcome. It can subtly shift the emotional space from being combative to collaborative.

Arm Yourself With Solutions, Not Complaints

It’s easy to complain. It’s why so many people excel at it. It’s not so easy to find a practical solution that takes care of everyone’s (not just your own) concerns. So whenever you can, come armed with a suggestion to address the issue along with examples of where your idea has worked for others. Since most people tend towards risk-averseness, sharing how others have been successful in similar situations can lessen misgivings and increase buy-in. If you have no solution, then enlist their support in finding one.

Know When To Let It Rest

You won’t always get others to see things your way so know when it’s time to let it go and move on. At least now people know where you stand and you can either accept things as they are or make other plans. Either way, you’ll have built self-respect for making a stand and likely also earned the respect of those you challenged for the courage it took you to do so.

Saying something that rubs against the consensus opinion can cause friction. However, as I wrote in Brave: 50 Everyday Acts of Courage To Thrive In Work, Love and Life, being too agreeable when you need to speak assertively can put your self-respect at risk. Where is your fear of rocking the boat (and being regarded as bossy, or pushy, or even difficult to get along with) keeping you from speaking up more bravely?

Margie is a keynote speaker & bestselling author. Get her latest book Brave & take the Train The Brave Challenge

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Forbes.com | July 8, 2015 | Margie Warrell