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Strategy: 7 Habits of Organized People…Organized People aren’t Born; They’re Built. Here are the Habits that you can Cultivate to be just like Them.

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We all know that one friend or coworker who is super-organized. The person who is punctual, finishes projects with time to spare, and always knows exactly where to find what they need when they need it.  Instead of  hating that person, why not figure out how they do it?

BusinessChange

“Organized people are not born; they’re built,” says John Trosko, founder ofOrganizingLA, a Los Angeles-based organizing firm. “The people who emerge as ‘organized’ use a variety of tools and methods to accomplish their goals and priorities in life.”

Their systems become habits, says Trosko. Here are seven things organized people do on a regular basis to stay on top of it all:

1. ORGANIZED PEOPLE SEEK OUT TOOLS

From kitchen timers to smartphone technology, organized people find tools that can help them make the most of their day, week, and year, says Trosko.

They use mobile phone apps with pop-up reminders, for example. They also use timers to help visualize the passage of time. And they break down tasks into smaller chunks and take short non-work-related breaks in between, which increases their overall productivity.

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2. ORGANIZED PEOPLE SET PRIORITIES

Instead of having an overwhelming number of commitments and little idea where to start, organized people have a clear sense of what’s important, says Lisa Zaslow, founder of Gotham Organizers, New York City-based professional organizers.

“They know what their goals are, what needs to be done when, and what can be put off,” she says. “They start the day with a clear plan of their ‘MITs’—their ‘most important things.’ And they review their plan throughout the day and adjust as necessary.”

3. ORGANIZED PEOPLE HAVE LESS STUFF

The golden rule of organization is to have as little as possible to organize, says productivity expert Hillary Rettig, author of The 7 Secrets of the Prolific.

“They figure out what the core of their professional and personal missions are and eliminate all else,” she says. “They will still have stuff to organize, but they’ve made the job doable.”

4. ORGANIZED PEOPLE CHOOSE SIMPLE SOLUTIONS

When organizing systems are complex, they often go unused. Trosko says organized people use simple tools that make an easy job of putting things away.

For example, baskets hold receipts that need to be filed, bills that need to be paid, and books that are waiting to be read. A hook by the door makes it convenient to hang up a coat. And bowls and trays near an entryway will keep keys and wallets in one place.

5. ORGANIZED PEOPLE PRACTICE MAINTENANCE

Organization requires continual upkeep, says Zaslow: “You don’t go to the gym, get in shape, then cancel your membership,” she says. “Being organized is the same.”

Organized people will take a few moments each day to put things back in their proper places. They might archive an email, for example, or put away papers.

“They don’t drop things in a random pile ‘just for now’—it’s always now,” says Zaslow. “The tiny amount of time it takes to do this is vastly less than the time it takes to look for something that wasn’t put away properly.”

6. ORGANIZED PEOPLE REGULARLY PURGE

Situations change and formerly useful things become unnecessary. Instead of letting clutter sneak up on them, Zaslow says organized people periodically purge. They clear out their files when the drawer starts to get full, for example, and they toss the notes for the project that was canceled.

Zaslow says she once had a client who would buy a new filing cabinet each time one got full: “By the time she called me to intervene, she had file cabinets in her home office, guest room, upstairs hall, den, and basement,” she says. “Needless to say, most of the information was out of date and irrelevant.”

7. ORGANIZED PEOPLE PROJECT THEMSELVES INTO THE FUTURE

Using a two-person mind-set—present self and future self—can help you stay organized, says Lorie Marrero, founder of the Clutter Diet, an online organizing program. She likes to think of her future self when she takes care of small tasks right away.

“If I walk through a room and see a mess, I will say, ‘I bet if I do those dishes now my future self will be so much happier later,” she says. “That motivates me to do those favors for my future self.”

Marrero says organized people also think into the future when they add activities to their calendars: “They ask: ‘What could I do before, during, or after this appointment to improve it?’” she says. If they need to prepare for it, bring something to it, or follow up after it, they schedule it now and put it on their task list.

Fastcompany.com | February 2, 2015 | 

#Leadership:Tales About Men, Money & Mistakes From Self-Made Women…What is your Best Mistake? A Mistake that in the Moment seemed Catastrophic, but Turned out to be a Critical Piece of Finding your Success?

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This post is part of the “Self-Made Women” series featuring women who came from a world without power or wealth, but with the support of family, teachers and mentors, they  found their way to success.

 

 

Maria L. Chrin

What is your best mistake? A mistake that in the moment seemed catastrophic, but turned out to be a critical piece of finding your success? A mistake that you learned from and want to pass on the lessons to others?

That’s what Andrea Guendelman, Co Founder and CEO of BeVisible and I asked the self-made women we are featuring in this series. Each of these women is at the top of her industry. They definitely know that failure isn’t fatal. In fact, these women are living proof that mistakes are required for innovative success. Here are four of their life lessons — truths as opposed to sugarcoated narratives — bringing us lessons we all can learn from:

Sue Chen (44) Founder and CEO, NOVA Medical Products.  My best mistake was marrying what I term as “the biggest loser.” Not able to take my own advice given to other women, I married the absolute wrong guy despite all the glaring and present red flags… so no surprise. He pulled me to the bottom of my life, but in that pit of emotional abuse, pain and misery,

I discovered my personal Emotional Bucket, higher calling and ultimately self-love. Once you know the landscape of pain, you also can know the landscape of change, disruption and the unimaginable. Because knowing pain and having been to the “dark side” and come back, equips you to go head-to-head and conquer the most debilitating of emotions, and that is fear. It’s an incredible chemistry that happens in your emotional bucket when pain, suffering and misery are mixed in with passion and love… prevailing. Failing forward in my marriage brought me together with my Emotional Bucket which is always with me. I can reach in anytime and access its vast resource of experiences and emotions because it is mine and no one else’s.  My Emotional Bucket is the most powerful part of who I am… past, present and future.

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Brittney Castro (30), CFP, CRPC, AAMS. Founder and CEO,Financially Wise Women.  My biggest mistake was thinking I had to do it all alone. I know this sounds so cliche but when I first launched my company I didn’t ask for help often enough. After six months into launching my own company, I was exhausted. I was doing too much and not delegating enough to my team and support group. After a week of just feeling so completely burnt out and not capable of doing any work, I realized I needed to ask for help. Since that point, I’ve learned that asking for help is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength and that no one can do it alone.  I’ve also realized that letting people help you is a beautiful gift as it builds a community around your work and mission in life. Now I ask for help often and as early as possible and because I do so, I have so much more fun along the way.

Sarah Kunst (28) Venture Investor and Advisor and Contributing Editor, Marie Claire.  The last startup I did was a forward fail. I led product, growth and revenue at a retail startup and we launched with too little funding runway, underestimated the difficulty and expense of getting app users and did not start fundraising or looking for exits soon enough. We failed and went to zero, leaving me out of a job and our investors out of money. However, from the ashes I emerged with invaluable knowledge about early stage startups, the retail industry and a network of investors who landed me my next job as a venture capitalist. I never would have landed in venture capital or be able to effectively help companies if not for the mistakes I made in that failed startup.

Maria L. Chrin (50) Managing Partner, Circle Wealth Management, LLC.  My biggest mistake has been letting fear and self-doubt take over when making decisions. During my tenure at Goldman Sachs, I was given several opportunities to get on the “partner track” but chose not to. I convinced myself that leaving my wealth management practice, where I had control and unlimited upside, was not a good career move. Those were valid reasons but I was just afraid to trade a known path for an unknown one.

I focused on all that could go wrong and made a short-sighted decision. However, the experience taught me to focus on what is in my control instead of on what is not. Each of us controls a lot — our work ethic, quality of work, attitude, dedication, ability to collaborate and add value. If we can appreciate all of that, we can put fear aside. Recognizing this inspired me to launch Circle Wealth Management and helped us navigate the 2008 market downturn. We need to understand ourselves, our

goals, and how hard we are willing to work to achieve them. With that understanding and a healthy combination of self-confidence and paranoia, we can take on fear and succeed.

Self-Made Women Series Post #1:  From Murder To The Mayor’s Office: A Story Of Grit And Excellence

Self-Made Women Series Post #2: From Outsider To The C-Suite: A Story On How To ‘Get To The Yes’

Self-Made Women Series Post #3: A Self-Made Woman Gets Lucky In The Middle Seat

Denise Restauri is the author of Their Roaring Thirties: Brutally Honest Career Talk From Women Who Beat The Youth Trap now available for iBooks, Amazon, and Vook.

Forbes.com | April 9, 2015 | Denise Restauri

Strategy: How To Kickstart Your Productivity This Weekend…Exhaustion, Burnout & Illness can All be Fueled by the Feeling that you Never get Chance to Switch Off.

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Could you use your weekend to be more productive, not by cramming it full of work, but in other ways?  Time away from the office is an important aspect of productivity. For a start, that’s when we get to choose for ourselves how we spend our time.

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Often, however, when it gets to Monday morning we don’t feel refreshed or productive. We feel in need of another weekend before the week has even begun. What should you do at the weekend to help boost your productivity for the following week?

Here are some suggestions of strategies to experiment with.

Leave it in the office

Many of us feel a huge expectation and obligation to work at the weekend. Sometimes, rather than this being driven by our bosses or colleagues, however, this is a habit we have created ourselves. Ask yourself why you are working at the weekend? If you end up working at the weekend to catch up on work you didn’t get done and want to be more productive during the week instead, start to analyse what you could do to boost your productivity. Do you need tactics to deal with procrastination? Are distractions costing you time? Isleaving work on time an issue? Leaving work in the office and calling it a day (or a week) is sometimes really hard to do. But rather than so often worrying about working more, perhaps we should start worrying about living more.

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Let your mind wander

Letting your mind wander is an important state for making connections between different pieces of information. It can help us connect seemingly unconnected things, and often leads to bright ideas. During the week, we often don’t have as much time for this as at the weekend. When we’re concentrating intently on a task at work, or when we’re being bombarded with information or demands, our attention is taken up by these things. So take some time out at the weekend to let your mind wander while you walk, run, or simply close your eyes. Don’t allow digital distractions or interruptions – for example from your smartphone or emails – while you do this, otherwise that’s where your attention will turn. See what ideas you come up with and what connections you make when you let your mind wander.

Do the little things

Often what overwhelms us during the week is a pile of personal admin tasks we need to deal with, clear through or do, that we just don’t have time for alongside work during the week. A weekend is a good time to get through the backlog of small tasks that will plague you all week long if they are not done, clearing space for concentrating on other things. Once you’ve cleared the backlog, do tasks that take five minutes or less straight away (whether it’s a weekday or weekend) so that those small tasks (like putting things away or booking appointments) never get added to the To Do list in the first place and don’t mount up into an overwhelming pile.

Power of rest

To work in a highly productive way during the week, you need to have enough energy. But low-level constant working over evenings and weekends (for example checking email and doing work tasks) can lead to us not taking the opportunity to get the rest we need. Because digital devices mean we can work anywhere and any time, we often adopt these habits without thinking much about the consequences. This can creep and become an expectation we feel to be constantly on call. Exhaustion, burnout and illness can all be fuelled by the feeling that you never get chance to switch off. Setting aside time for rest means investing in sleep, and knowing when to step away from your smartphone or other work demands. See whether you feel more productive on Monday morning after a proper dose of time out.

Frances Booth is author of The Distraction Trap: How to Focus in a Digital World. To get your free first chapter of The Distraction Trap, and for more productivity tips, join her mailing list here

Forbes.com | April 10, 2015 | Frances Booth

 

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Leadership:9 Of The Worst Mistakes You Can Ever Make At Work…We’ve all Heard of (or seen firsthand) People Doing some Pretty Crazy Things at Work

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We’ve all heard of (or seen firsthand) people doing some pretty crazy things at work. Truth is, you don’t have to throw a chair through a window or quit in the middle of a presentation to cause irreparable damage to your career.

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No matter how talented you are or what you’ve accomplished, there are certain behaviors that instantly change the way people see you (and forever cast you in a negative light).

The following list contains nine of the most notorious behaviors that you should avoid at all costs.

Telling Lies

So many lies begin with good intentions—people want to protect themselves or someone else—but lies have a tendency to grow and spread until they’re discovered, and once everyone knows that you’ve lied, there’s no taking it back.

Getting caught up in a lie, no matter how small, is exhausting and hard on your self-esteem. You have to be authentic if you want to be happy with who you are.

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Gossiping

People make themselves look terrible when they get carried away with gossiping about other people. Wallowing in talk of other people’s misdeeds or misfortunes may end up hurting their feelings if the gossip finds its way to them, but gossiping will make you look negative and spiteful every time, guaranteed.

Announcing That You Hate Your Job

The last thing anyone wants to hear at work is someone complaining about how much they hate their job. Doing so labels you as a negative person and brings down the morale of the group. Bosses are quick to catch on to naysayers who drag down morale, and they know that there are always enthusiastic replacements waiting just around the corner.

Having an Emotional Hijacking

My company provides 360° feedback and executive coaching, and we come across far too many instances of people throwing things, screaming, making people cry, and other telltale signs of an emotional hijacking.

An emotional hijacking demonstrates low emotional intelligence, and it’s an easy way to get fired. As soon as you show that level of instability, people will question whether or not you’re trustworthy and capable of keeping it together when it counts.

Exploding at anyone, regardless of how much they might “deserve it,” turns a huge amount of negative attention your way. You’ll be labeled as unstable, unapproachable, and intimidating. Controlling your emotions keeps you in the driver’s seat. When you are able to control your emotions around someone who wrongs you, they end up looking bad instead of you.

Taking Credit for Someone Else’s Work

We’ve all experienced that stomach-dropping feeling that happens when you discover that someone has stolen your idea. Taking credit for someone else’s work­—no matter how small—creates the impression that you haven’t accomplished anything significant on your own. Stealing credit also shows that you have zero regard for your team and your working relationships.

Bragging

When someone hits a home run and starts celebrating as they run the bases, it’s safe to assume that they haven’t hit very many home runs. On the other hand, if they hit a home run and simply run the bases, it conveys a business-as-usual mentality, which is far more intimidating to the other team.

Accomplishing great things without bragging about them demonstrates the same strong mentality—it shows people that succeeding isn’t unusual to you.

Backstabbing

The name says it all. Stabbing your colleagues in the back, intentionally or otherwise, is a huge source of strife in the workplace. One of the most frequent forms of backstabbing is going over someone’s head to solve a problem. People typically do this in an attempt to avoid conflict, but they end up creating even more conflict as soon as the victim feels the blade. Anytime you make someone look bad in the eyes of their colleagues, it feels like a stab in the back, regardless of your intentions.

Eating Smelly Food

Unless you happen to work on a ship, your colleagues are going to mind if you make the entire place smell like day-old fish. The general rule of thumb when it comes to food at work is, anything with an odor that might waft beyond the kitchen door should be left at home.

It might seem like a minor thing, but smelly food is inconsiderate and distracting—and so easily avoidable. When something that creates discomfort for other people is so easily avoided, it tends to build resentment quickly. Your pungent lunch tells everyone that you just don’t care about them, even when you do.

Burning Bridges

So much of work revolves around the people you meet and the connections you make. Dropping an atomic bomb on any professional relationship is a major mistake.

One of TalentSmart’s clients is a large chain of coffee shops. They have a relatively high turnover, so when a barista quits, it isn’t usually taken personally. One barista, however, managed to burn every single bridge she had in a single day. The surprising thing is that she didn’t yell or do anything extreme; all she did was leave.

Without warning, she showed up to her Monday shift, told the store manager she was quitting (she had found a better-paying job somewhere else), and walked out. The result, of course, was that every shift that she was scheduled to work for the next two weeks had to be done with one less person, as she provided no time to find a replacement.

She most likely saw her actions as being offensive only to the manager (whom she didn’t like), but in reality, she created two miserable weeks for everyone who worked at the shop. She ruined her otherwise positive connections, with every single one of her colleagues.

Bringing It All Together

These behaviors sound extreme and highly inconsiderate, but they have a tendency to sneak up on you. A gentle reminder is a great way to avoid them completely.

What other behaviors should I add to this list? Please share your thoughts in the comments section below as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.

 

Forbes.com | ArTravis Bradberry

 

 

Strategy: How To Tell When People Lie & Make Them Tell The Truth…Why do People Lie? Because they Fear the Negative Consequences of Disclosing the Truth.

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When I served as a therapist for a number of years after earning my Masters in marriage and family therapy, I had a window into the private, secret lives of hundreds of people grappling with life’s most serious challenges. I found then, as I see in my daily life and coaching work today, that lying – to ourselves and to others – is a regular part of human existence for so many. I was trained to see the signs of lying, and to find new ways to create a safe space for people to tell the brutal, honest truth to themselves, and deal with it more effectively and positively.

I was intrigued, then, to learn about the new book Get The Truth: Former CIA Officers Teach You How to Persuade Anyone To Tell All, by former CIA officers Philip Houston, Michael Floyd, and Susan Carnicero. They are among the most well-known experts in recognizing deceptive behavior and extracting an honest answer.

A follow-up to their New York Times bestseller Spy The Lie,the book teaches readers the simple methods they used in the CIA to get the truth out of absolutely anyone—without resorting to torture. Whether it’s speaking with your teenager about how that dent suddenly appeared in the car, or your spouse about a mysteriously deleted browser history, or your business partner about a discrepancy in the books, their step-by-step guide lays out how to apply these principles to all aspects of our lives.

I asked the authors to share their answers to my most pressing questions about lying, and here’s what they offered.

Kathy Caprino: Why do people lie? What are the top three reasons, and what are they afraid of if they tell the truth?

Philip Houston, Michael Floyd and Susan Carnicero:Here are the top reasons we’ve found:

Because they fear the negative consequences of disclosing the truth.

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These are the cases in which people engage in an active concealment of information that’s driven by a fear of what will happen if that information is revealed. The circumstances associated with these lies often involve an act of wrongdoing that the person wants to hide.

Because they want others to believe something about them that isn’t true.

Perhaps it’s a news anchor who claims to have been in a helicopter that was brought down by an RPG in a war zone, when he was actually in a different helicopter at the time. Maybe it’s a job candidate who embellishes his resume, or someone who fibs about his physical attributes in an online chat forum. These are the lies people tell as a means of enhancing the positive image that others have of them.

Because they want to avoid hurting someone’s feelings.

Whether it’s telling a friend that we love her dramatic new hairstyle when we really think it looks ridiculous on a woman her age, or telling a child that the picture he drew of the horse is beautiful when it really looks more like a misshapen table with a bust of a goblin on one end, we find ourselves telling these benevolent “social lies” quite readily as we navigate our way through the day.

Caprino: So, how can we spot a lie quickly and easily? What are the signs?

Houston et al: There are five categories of deceptive behavior that you need to look for:

Evasion: Think of these behaviors as linguistic acts of concealment. Example: Failure to answer the question.

Persuasion: These behaviors are aimed at convincing you of something, rather than conveying the information you’re asking for. Example: Invoking religion.

Manipulation: These behaviors are meant to disrupt your game plan. Example: Failure to understand a simple question.

Aggression: These behaviors are typically exhibited by a person who feels cornered, and who needs to lash out to get you to back off. Example: Attacking your credibility.

Reaction: These are behaviors that are triggered by the autonomic nervous system when your question creates a spike in anxiety. Example: Hand-to-face activity.

Your aim is to identify a cluster, which is defined as any combination of two or more deceptive behaviors, which can be verbal or nonverbal. Under our model, the first deceptive behavior has to occur within the first five seconds after the stimulus, which is your question. This way, you can reliably conclude that the behavior was prompted by your question.

Caprino: What are the key steps to take to get the truth out of anyone?

Houston et al: There are nine key steps to getting at the truth:

1. Adopt a sincere, understanding tone and demeanor.

There’s a saying to the effect that the guilty person seeks only to be understood, for to be understood gives the appearance of being forgiven. Far from confrontational or belligerent, the demeanor you project should be engaged, calm, empathetic, and most of all, sincere. Slowing your rate of speech and lowering your voice a bit will aid you tremendously in evincing sincerity.

2. Help the person rationalize his actions.

This will nudge him a step in the direction of being less focused on long-term consequences, and more focused on the reasons you’re giving him to see telling the truth as a viable option. Rationalizing his actions or behavior by reminding him, for example, that everyone is human, and that everyone makes mistakes, will help weaken his resolve to withhold the truth.

3. Minimize the seriousness of the situation.

The more you’re able to downplay the consequential nature of the matter about which the individual is withholding the truth, the more comfortable he will be to share the information you’re seeking. When he hears you say, “It’s important that we not blow this out of proportion,” he’ll be struck by how reasonable you are, and you’ll likely be perceived as much less of an adversary.

4. Socialize the situation so the person doesn’t feel so alone.

If I have the impression that you and others might think of me as a pariah if I admit that I did the bad thing, I’m going to be awfully reluctant to admit it. On the other hand, if you tell me this is the sort of thing you see all the time being done by men and women in all walks of life, I’m going to feel much less alienated.

5. Assure the individual that there is plenty of blame to go around.

Chances are, a person who wants to conceal the truth will not have adopted a “buck stops here” mentality. It’s always easier for someone to fess up if he sees that the finger isn’t being pointed solely at him. Liberally shower the blame wherever you can convincingly do so—society, the system, management, bad apples are all potential accomplices in causing the bad thing to happen.

6. Don’t allow the person to voice a lie or a denial.

If the person is in lying or denial mode, you don’t want his lips moving—the more opportunity he’s given to articulate the lie, the more psychologically entrenched he’ll become, and the less likely he will be to reverse himself and tell you the truth.

7. Take advantage of the power of repetition.

Human nature is such that the more frequently we hear something, the more likely we are to believe it, or to at least be open to the possibility. Remember that if the person is in denial mode, you don’t want his lips moving, so you’re the one doing the talking. Freely rearticulate the rationalization, minimization, socialization, and projection of blame that will help the person, even if only temporarily, to see things your way.

8. Use implicit rather than explicit language.

The more implicit you are in the language you use, the easier it will likely be for the person to buy in to what you’re saying. If you tell the person you want to work with him to help get the matter “resolved,” let his mind take that where it will. To you, “resolved” might mean a conviction. To him, it might mean something he can live with. Similarly, avoid any language that might remind the person of negative consequences: He “took” rather than “stole” the jewelry; he “gained unfair advantage” rather than “cheated” on the test; he “inappropriately touched” rather than “assaulted” the woman.

9. Never sit in judgment.

Remember that your goal from the outset was to get the truth, not to assume the roles of judge and jury . That goal will be considerably more difficult to accomplish if the person feels that you’re judging him, so make sure you avoid chastising or reprimanding him in any way. You want him to see you as a confidant, not as an arbiter of his fate.

To learn how to identify deceit and elicit the truth, visit Get The Truth: Former CIA Officers Teach You How to Persuade Anyone To Tell All.

 

Forbes.com | Arpril 7, 2015 | Kathy Caprino 

Your Career: 7 Ways To Get Noticed At Work…“It’s about Results… And Likeability,”

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Over the course of my work as a career coach, I’ve had some exceptional clients. While I typically help eager job hunters get more clarity and job offers, I felt inspired to work with a young woman named Amy, who didn’t fit my usual profile.

resume-mistakes-11

Amy wasn’t concerned about landing a job, she was becoming increasingly concerned about getting ahead in her job. In her words, she’d been doing “everything” that was asked of her, but no one was acknowledging her efforts, let alone rewarding them. Meanwhile, other entry-level employees were flying past her with promotions and raises.

… Sound familiar?

We immediately got down to the specifics, assessing the culture and mission of Amy’s company. I learned that it was a small company with a very casual vibe, yet Amy couldn’t even get up the nerve to speak to the CEO when she saw her in the lunchroom. When I pointed out that her hesitation to communicate was hurting her chances of promotion, Amy was bewildered.

“It’s about results, right?” Amy asked.

“It’s about results… And likeability,” I shared.

How could Amy ever going to convince her colleagues that she cared about the business if she wouldn’t make any effort to engage with the people in it?

The truth is that the people who get promoted are doing more than just getting the work done.  Studies show that how we value an employee’s competence changes according to how much we like or dislike that person.

In other words,  being really good at your job isn’t enough.

For an employee to stand out, being likeable is a huge indicator for career success. The good news is that the biggest hindrance to likeability is apathy… This means you can change how others perceive you simply by making the choice to care.

There are steps you can take right now, regardless of your circumstances that will put you back on the promotion path, where you belong:

1. Take initiative. Are there any tasks that have been lingering on your boss’ to-do list for a few weeks? Have the office plants been calling out for water that everyone’s been too lazy to give them? A great way to get noticed is by taking on a project that no one wants to tackle, but that has to get done. I’ll never forget my last corporate job before becoming a career coach. One of my employees went out of her way to make a chart of the deliverables, and it just made my heart surge. It was a job that needed to be done but I hadn’t set aside any time for it, so when she took the initiative and presented it to me, it felt like Christmas morning!

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When you want to stand out at work use your job description as a starting point, not an end point.

2. Build rapport, everywhere. People who get big things done are people who know people, but the Amy’s of the world have a tendency to think that inter-office relationship building is too time-consuming and draining to be worthwhile. I teach hundreds of job hunters around the world the networking skills they need to create contacts out of thin air, and the truth is that it’s less complicated than people make it out to be. Start with a gesture: If you’re running out for Starbucks SBUX +1.03%, offer to pick up a latte for your coworker.

Networking is about kindness, mutual support and growth… Who’s in?

Every aspect of your professional life will improve if you get to know your colleagues and making them feel comfortable getting to know you. Once you’ve broken the ice, you won’t feel nearly as uncomfortable about initiating a conversation in the elevator.

3. Participate in the office’s extracurricular activities. Needless to say, I recommend minimizing the vodka cranberry cocktails during office happy hours, but know that the boundaries of good behavior don’t end with your sobriety. Back in my corporate life, I’ll never forget my company’s Halloween costume party, where a younger member of the team proudly showed up in an elaborately overdone get-up that was so tone-deaf and inappropriate. It distracted everyone else from enjoying the evening, and the mortified CEO “joked” that he’d never be able to take the employee seriously again.

The bottom line: When it comes to office events, never put more effort into your social persona than you’re putting into your professional persona, and when in doubt, always err on the side of maturity.

My colleague’s bad costume decision is undoubtedly going to show up in his bank account.

4. Do business development. Every organization has a bottom line, and if you’re bringing in new business opportunities, you will always be seen as an asset. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been hired for marketing; it’s all about contributing in a bigger way. This doesn’t mean you need to be a walking billboard for your employer, but you should maintain a keen awareness of the opportunities that surround you, whether you’re in a coffee line or a board meeting.

5. Be a team player. Sometimes you’re the star of the show, and sometimes you’re in the chorus. Being alert to your coworkers’ needs, and offering to help when their workload is overwhelming, is the best way to establish yourself as a team player.

You don’t need to be a martyr of self-sacrifice by staying late every single night to do someone else’s work, but stepping up without expecting any personal benefit will never go unnoticed or unappreciated.

6. Never talk smack. That’s the number one way to get noticed…and get fired. Your critiques may be spot-on and your impersonation of the boss might be the best in show, but don’t resort to gossip as a way of gaining popularity in the office.

It’s a universal truth that the person doing the trash talking always looks worse than the person who’s being trashed, even when the criticism is deserved. Stay above the fray at all costs.

7. Speak up. At 23 years old, I was hired to run a program for the Pentagon, and I’ll never forget my fear of speaking up as I sat in a sea of military leaders. The biggest shift in my career came when I took a quantum leap out of my comfort zone and started sharing my thoughts in staff meetings.

One day, they were trying to come up with a new approach for the program’s curriculum, and I sat there, mentally poking holes in all of their ideas. After they’d exhausted their options, I finally just let loose with my suggestions.

My input transformed the work we were doing, and my role on the team became more significant overnight.

It can be terrifying to put yourself out there, but the employee who’s still coming up with ideas long after the creativity fountain runs dry is a huge asset to any organization.

Over the course of a few months, Amy started to realize that having a voice in the workforce is like a muscle that grows stronger with frequent use. With each step forward, her self-consciousness loosened its grip and she became confident about seizing opportunities. She felt empowered to step up, regardless of whether it was to run a meeting or fix the copy machine.

The standout employees are the ones who behave like leaders, even when their title is Intern. The irony is that when you’re more focused on the results than the promotion, your title will change faster than you can even imagine.

If you don’t believe me, guess who’s now managing her company’s brand new office in London?

That would be—you guessed it—Amy.

 

Forbes.com | Arpil 3, 2015 | Ashley Stahl

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Leadership: 7 Daily Rituals Of Highly Effective Leaders…It is not What you are Going to do but What you are Doing Today that Counts- Napoleon Hill

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You can learn everything you need to learn in order to achieve anything, but you can never change your leadership until you change your rituals.

Directions Man

Rituals can strengthen and spotlight the values, intentions, and experiences you have chosen to live by; they and can be useful when we are trying to figure out what is important.

Here are some things that great leaders are doing wholeheartedly to make each day count.

Ritual of READING: Books are the understated and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of mentors, and the most patient of teachers. Become an avid reader; invest your time by reading something educational, inspirational, or motivational.

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Ritual of LISTENING: Leaders know that time is precious. Give yourself the advantage of learning something new by listening to audio programs — and repeat them until you have digested the information. Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply. Learn something by listening.

Ritual of MENTORSHIP: One of the greatest things we can do for ourselves is to learn from a mentors.  A mentor isn’t someone who lectures, but someone who inspires you to give the best in order to discover what you already know. Find a mentor, grasp what they have done, copy what they do, and then learn how to improve upon it.

Ritual of FEEDBACK: Leaders embrace feedback both negative and positive. Find someone who knows you well and ask them for feedback. Don’t justify or argue but listen and evaluate the feedback carefully, especially when it gets hard to swallow or accept. Use all feedback to learn.

Ritual of ASKING: As leaders, in order to grow, we must be willing to ask for help — whether it’s assistance with a short-term situations or identifying and correcting a bad patterns. The more that we ask, the more things we will know. The more that we learn, the more we will grow.

Ritual of JOURNALING: Many of the best leaders keep a journal and develop a daily habit of journaling. It’s an excellent way to measure your growth and progress, which is sometimes hard to grasp in the day-to-day perspective. Journaling helps us to see clearer, to remember more, and to see what counts.

Ritual Of IMPROVEMENT: The best leaders dedicate themselves to constant growth. They commit to finding small ways to improve, every day, all the time. No matter how good you get you can always get better, and that’s the exciting part.

Rituals can be transformative. The amalgamation of setting an intention, heightens our focus, elevates our emotional involvement, and embodies our participation in effecting our lives and leading.

Make a better tomorrow, by making each day count.

Lead From Within: When you become a little bit better each day when you make learning a constant ritual. The best leaders are constantly improving, learning, growing and developing.

Businessinisder.com | June 3, 2014 | 

http://www.lollydaskal.com/leadership/daily-leadership-rituals-that-make-today-count/#ixzz3WiWA4E9S

Strategy:Former FBI hostage Negotiation Trainer Explains How to Get People to Do What you Want…The More they Open Up to you, the More Invested they’ll be in Hearing What you Have to Say

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Mark Goulston spent two years role-playing for a living.  He’d pretend to be a suicidal policeman, holding a gun to his neck, threatening to take his own life.

Mark Goulston

Mark Goulston, a former FBI hostage negotiation trainer, role playing.

His job was to challenge his audience — a room full of FBI agents and police officers — to talk him out of it.

“In the end, I always pulled the trigger and then from the point of view of that role play, I would tell them what they could have asked and could have said that would have caused me to give up and surrender,” explains Goulston, a psychiatrist and former FBI hostage negotiation trainer.

Today, Goulston, 67, is a business advisor and consultant, using the skills he honed in his hostage negotiation training job to coach executives and employees at big corporations, including GE, IBM, and Goldman Sachs. He’s also the author of the best-selling book, “Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone.” 

We recently spoke to Goulston to learn how to get people — clients, colleagues, employees, or a boss — to do what you want at work.

Here’s what he said:

1. Get them to talk.

After you make a request — or subtly hint at what you want someone to do — stop and let that person do all the talking.

“When they start talking, they will self-discover the urgency of your request” he explains. They’ll decide on their own that they should oblige, without you having to beg.

If you do all the talking, they may tune you out or feel like they’re being told (rather than asked) to do something, which will make them not want to do it.

Like this Article ??  Share it !   First Sun Consulting, LLC- Outplacement/Executive Coaching Services, is Proud to sponsor/provide our ‘FSC Career Blog’  Article Below.  Over 600 current articles like these are on our website in our FSC Career Blog (https://www.firstsun.com/fsc-career-blog/)  with the most updated/current articles on the web for new management trends, employment updates along with career branding techniques  .

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2. As they are speaking, pay attention to the adjectives and adverbs they use. 

“An adjective is a way to embellish a noun, and an adverb is a way to embellish a verb — and both modifiers indicate something that the person has some ’emotional juice’ on,” Goulston explains. “After the other person stops talking — even if they ask you a question —  pause for a few seconds, and instead of answering it, respond with: ‘Hmmm…’ (This communicates that you have listened and considered what they are saying.) Then, say more about the adjective or adverb they used.”

By doing this they will reveal what really matters to them and be more invested in the conversation, and therefore more interested in helping you.

For example, if someone you are speaking to uses the adjective “amazing” with regard to an opportunity and asks you a question after they finish speaking, try responding with, “I can answer your question, but before I do, tell me more about this amazing opportunity.” “This will cause them to open up more to you and at a deeper level than if you had just directly answered their question,” Goulston says. “The more they open up to you, the more invested they’ll be in hearing what you have to say.”

3. Use ‘fill in the blanks.’

“When you ask someone a question, you trigger an unconscious flashback of their having been put on the spot earlier in life by a teacher, parent, or coach, and you create a syntactical ‘you versus me’ disconnect,” Goulston says. This can lead to a reflexive “pull back” by them, he explains.

To avoid this, mix in with questions or requests a “fill in the blank,” he suggests. “For instance, it is more confrontational to ask someone, using a ‘you better know the answer to this’ tone, ‘What are you going to do about x situation?’ than it is to say, using and inviting ‘want to know’ tone, ‘What you’re planning to do about x situation is …?'”

Mark GoulstonCourtesy of Mark GoulstonMark Goulston.

When you use the latter approach you have syntactically invited the other person into a sentence with you, instead of asking a question, “which may cause them to think it is you versus them,” says Goulston.

4. Trigger positive flashbacks.

Believe it or not, whenever you say, do, or ask something, you almost always trigger unconscious flashbacks for the person you’re speaking to. “The key is to trigger positive flashbacks, not negative ones,” Goulston says.

If the person associates you, your question, or your request with something good, they’re more likely to comply.

For example, Goulston coaches many women on how to succeed in the C-suite. When he recently asked one woman why she chose to employ him, a male coach, rather than a female coach, she responded, “You’re like a protective big brother who’s smart, funny, slightly irreverent — but when you confront me with something I need to change, instead of becoming defensive I listen and cooperate with you because what you say is ‘laced with love.'”

5. Be a ‘plusser,’ not a ‘topper.’

One key to getting people to do what you want is to make them feel good and important.

“In conversations, ‘plussers’ build on or add to what the other person is saying; while ‘toppers’ either hijack the conversation abruptly to make it be about them or try to top what the other person is saying as in, ‘Ah, that sounds like a nice trip you took to Florida. We went to Fiji.'”

Plussers, he says, cause others to feel that what they’re saying matters; toppers cause others to think that you were only listening to them to get your turn to speak “and even worse, make them feel less than,” Goulston says.

For an example, a plusser would say: “Wow, that’s a great idea! Really smart and creative. We could even go one step further and try X, if you think that would work.” While a topper would say: “Your idea is good but I actually ran my idea by our CEO already and he loved it — so maybe we should go with mine.”

6. Focus on the future — not past failures.

People don’t love criticism. They tend to get defensive when you bring up any situation in which they failed, Goulston says. So, if you’re trying to get someone to do something differently in the future, don’t focus on the past.

Try something like, “Going forward, something that I would greatly appreciate would be if you could do X because it would be really helpful to the entire team.”

“Letting them know you’d appreciate it, and why, is important because it allows them to feel like they’re making a valuable contribution and a positive impact,” Goulston explains.

“When you’re trying to persuade people, more often than not they feel you’re being pushy,” he says. “When you focus on influencing them, they’re much less defensive and open to hearing what you have to say.”

NOW WATCH: 5 Proven Strategies That Will Make You A Better Negotiator

 

Businessinsider.com | April 7, 2015 | Jacquelyn  Smith  

http://www.businessinsider.com/fbi-negotiation-trainer-on-how-to-get-people-to-do-what-you-want-2015-4#ixzz3WdOYk7kQ

Leadership:12 Things Truly Confident People Do Differently…Whether you Think you Can, or you Think you Can’t—you’re Right. Henry Ford

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Confidence takes many forms, from the arrogance of Floyd Mayweather to the quiet self-assurance of Jane Goodall. True confidence—as opposed to the false confidence people project to mask their insecurities—has a look all its own.

It's important to realize that you don't actually need to like an employee's personality.

When it comes to confidence, one thing is certain: truly confident people always have the upper hand over the doubtful and the skittish, because they inspire others and they make things happen.

I think Henry Ford said it best:

 Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t—you’re right.

Ford’s notion that your mentality has a powerful effect upon your ability to succeed is manifest in the results of a recent study at the University of Melbourne where confident people went on to earn higher wages and get promoted more quickly than anyone else.

Learning to be confident is clearly important, but what is it that truly confident people do that sets them apart from everyone else?

I did some digging to uncover the 12 cardinal habits of truly confident people, so that you can incorporate these behaviors into your repertoire.

1. They Get Their Happiness From Within

Happiness is a critical element of confidence, because in order to be confident in what you do, you have to be happy with who you are.

People who brim with confidence derive their sense of pleasure and satisfaction from their own accomplishments, as opposed to what other people think of their accomplishments. They know that no matter what anyone says, you’re never as good or bad as people say you are.

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2. They Don’t Pass Judgment

Confident people don’t pass judgment on others because they know that everyone has something to offer, and they don’t need to take other people down a notch in order to feel good about themselves. Comparing yourself to other people is limiting. Confident people don’t waste time sizing people up and worrying about whether or not they measure up to everyone they meet.

3. They Don’t Say Yes Unless They Really Want To

Research conducted at the University of California in San Francisco shows that the more difficulty that you have saying no, the more likely you are to experience stress, burnout, and even depression. Confident people know that saying no is healthy and they have the self-esteem to make their no’s clear. When it’s time to say no, confident people avoid phrases like “I don’t think I can” or “I’m not certain.” They say no with confidence because they know that saying no to a new commitment honors their existing commitments and gives them the opportunity to successfully fulfill them.

4. They Listen More Than They Speak

People with confidence listen more than they speak because they don’t feel like they have anything to prove. Confident people know that by actively listening and paying attention to others, they are much more likely to learn and grow. Instead of seeing interactions as opportunities to prove themselves to others, they focus on the interaction itself, because they know this is a far more enjoyable and productive approach to people.

5. They Speak With Certainty

It’s rare to hear the truly confident utter phrases like, “Um,” “I’m not sure,” and “I think.” Confident people speak assertively because they know that it’s difficult to get people to listen to you if you can’t deliver your ideas with conviction.

6. They Seek Out Small Victories

Confident people like to challenge themselves and compete, even when their efforts yield small victories. Small victories build new androgen receptors in the areas of the brain responsible for reward and motivation. The increase in androgen receptors increases the influence of testosterone, which further increases their confidence and eagerness to tackle future challenges. When you have a series of small victories, the boost in your confidence can last for months.

7. They Exercise

A study conducted at Eastern Ontario Research Institute found that people who exercised twice a week for 10 weeks felt more competent socially, academically, and athletically. They also rated their body image and self-esteem as being higher. Best of all, physical changes in their bodies were not responsible for the uptick in confidence. It was the immediate, endorphin-fueled positivity from exercise that made all the difference.

8. They Don’t Seek Attention

People are turned off by those who are desperate for attention. Confident people know that being yourself is much more effective than trying to prove that you’re important. People catch on to your attitude quickly and are more attracted to the right attitude than what—or how many people—you know. And confident people always seem to bring the right attitude.

Confident people are masters of attention diffusion. When they’re being given attention for an accomplishment, they quickly shift the focus to all the people who worked hard to help get them there. They don’t crave the approval or praise because they draw their self-worth from within.

9. They Aren’t Afraid to be Wrong

Confident people aren’t afraid to be proven wrong. They like putting their opinion out there to see if it holds up, because they learn a lot from the times they are wrong and other people learn from them when they’re right. Self-assured people know what they are capable of and don’t treat being wrong as a personal slight.

10. They Stick Their Neck Out

When confident people see an opportunity they take it. Instead of worrying about what could go wrong they ask themselves, “What’s stopping me? Why can’t I do that?” And they go for it. Fear doesn’t hold them back because they know that if they never try they will never succeed and failure is just a great way to learn.

11. They Celebrate Other People

Insecure people constantly doubt their relevance and because of this they try to steal the spotlight and criticize others in order to prove their worth. Confident people, on the other hand, aren’t worried about their relevance because they draw their self-worth from within. Instead of insecurely focusing inward, confident people focus outward, which allows them to see all of the wonderful things that other people bring to the table. Praising people for their contributions is a natural result of this.

12. They Aren’t Afraid To Ask For Help

Confident people know that asking other people for help won’t make them seem weak or unintelligent. They know their strengths and weaknesses and they look to others to fill the gaps. They also know that learning from someone with more expertise is a great way to improve.

Bringing It All Together

Building confidence is a journey, not a destination. Please share your thoughts on the matter in the comments section below as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.

WATCH: The four behaviors of innovative leaders

 

Forbes.com | April 1, 2015 | Travis Bradberry

Strategy: How to Work 80 Hours a Week & Still Have a Life…Logging 80 Hours a Week is Not Uncommon, & that Number can Hit the Triple Digits During Especially Busy Weeks

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Wall Street executives, entrepreneurs, and consultants are known for working crazy long hours.  Logging 80 hours a week is not uncommon for them, and that number can hit the triple digits during especially busy weeks.

elevator pitch, man, tired, yawn

Turns out you CAN work crazy hours and still have a life.

But some have figured out how to have a life outside of work, despite their insane schedules.  We talked to several people who routinely put in 80 hours and successfully balance work and life.

Here’s how they do it:

Tomasz Kucemba, CEO of  KARORA Cosmetics.

This CEO logs 100 hours a week at peak performance, and lives by the mantra, “work hard, play harder.”

He achieves a work-life balance with help from his smartphone. “I do make time for a life outside of work. For example, right now I am coordinating a launch event, preparing for two international conference calls, and planning to take my girlfriend to the Dallas Food Festival. In this day in age we can do a lot of multitasking with our smartphones.”

His best survival hack is paying attention to his body. “I eat clean, take good supplements, and exercise regularly. I have noticed that since I switched to a vegetarian diet last year my energy levels have doubled.”

His career advice is to keep calm. “Don’t panic and get good at managing your time, and you will make it.

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Louise Fritjofsson, Cofounder and CEO of Vint.

This young entrepreneur is familiar with the startup grind, having experimented with several business ventures. She now oversees Vint, an on-demand fitness service, and works 75-80 hours per week.

unnamedVintLouise Fritjofsson.

She achieves a work-life balance by putting “me” time in her calendar. “I make sure to get in a workout every day, a long morning walk with my dog one day a week, and a couple of dinner or drink dates with my husband and friends each week. I also make sure to have private phone calls scheduled in my calendar. It sounds boring and some might argue ‘fake,’ but it works! Consider ‘me time’ appointments in your calendar as important as your board meetings, and suddenly you’re forced into a work-life balance that makes you more creative, happy and clear-thinking.”

Her best survival hack is a Swedish tradition. “In Sweden, all workplaces have a 3 pm fika. Fika means stopping what you’re doing, getting together with your coworkers, and taking a 15 minute break. A proper fika is enjoyed with coffee, tea, and a pastry of your choice (think cinnamon buns, soft ginger cookies, cupcakes). Add a bit of Swedish culture to your life.”

Her career advice is to get creative and have fun. “Do things because you love them, or because you really believe in the vision. Work should be an outlet for creativity, problem solving and having fun. If you truly love what you do, working long hours won’t drain you, and should in fact energize you.”

Deuce Thevenow, Cofounder of RECESS.

unnamed 1RECESSDeuce Thevenow.

The cofounder of this touring music festival that inspires college students to become the next generation of world-changing entrepreneurs, consistently logs 80 hours, and puts in several more when RECESS hits the road for a tour.

He achieves a work-life balance by blending his career and personal life. “My work life and personal life are very mixed. Even when I go out at night with friends, it’s with people in the music or startup space. Those friends introduce me to other people and I’m constantly pitching our business and looking for business development opportunities. We like to say that real business gets done outside of the office.”

His best survival hack is to make a zero-work day. “The weekends are my sanctuary. I usually try to make one day where I do zero work, and I really cherish this one day. I also enjoy camping, and the opportunity to get away from a computer and have no phone signal is a blessing.”

His career advice is to find, and help create, a positive company culture. “Each job is different, but the key to having a career in a business with demanding hours is to keep a positive office environment. We order food, listen to music, do yoga, drink beers, etc. Being able to actually enjoy being in your office rather than counting down the minutes until your ‘day ends’ is an indication that you may be in the wrong career.”

David Bonaventura, CEO of TSOVET Watches.

This CEO — who works 80-plus hours per week — found a passion for watches 15 years ago and has been designing and building them since. He starts each long day with coffee and email, and tries to squeeze in time for a quick surf when he can.

He achieves a work-life balance by prioritizing his family. “Finding a balance is always difficult for me, but I do my best to find time to spend with my family regardless of my schedule. I never miss my daughters events.”

His best survival hack is to deal with minor details outside of the office. “I prefer to tackle emails at night prior to bed and follow up again first thing in the morning in order to clear off as many incidental items as possible before arriving to the office. I try to stay as focused as possible on the tasks at hand, and eliminate any potential distractions or new opportunities until the bulk of projects and work is completed.”

His career advice is to pursue your passion. “Do what you love and love what you do.  There will always be stress, but if you love it, then it becomes part of the process and not a job.”

 

Businessinder.c0m | April 1, 2015 | KATHLEEN ELKINS

http://www.businessinsider.com/how-to-work-long-hours-and-still-have-a-life-2015-3#ixzz3WRFW61vT