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Your #Career : 19 Signs your Company Doesn’t Care about You…One of the Biggest Reasons People Leave their Jobs is Because they Feel UnAppreciated.

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“People come to work for more than a paycheck,” says Lynn Taylor, a national workplace expert, leadership coach, and author of “Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant: How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job.” “They want to feel that their contributions are making a difference. If an employer cares about your long-term growth and happiness, you’ll feel a much greater sense of purpose, and reward.”

Michael Kerr, an international business speaker and author of “The Humor Advantage,” points out that Google’s internal research into what makes a great leader at the company found that one of the key ingredients for was “expressing an interest in employees’ well being.” He says Facebook also conducted a company-wide study to seek out the key qualities that made their managers so great, and again, one of the top factors was “caring for their team members.”

“It can seem paradoxical when a company invests so much time in hiring and training an employee, only to eventually squander that asset,” Taylor says. “It’s important to be sure your employer cares about your success and job satisfaction, because without that genuine support, it’s hard to stay motivated, feel that you are part a larger team, and produce your best work. It’s a downward spiral. You could stagnate in your career — unless you notice the signs and take decisive action.”

Here are 19 signs your employer doesn’t care about you:

Your boss doesn’t offer any support, guidance, or feedback.

If your boss doesn’t take the time to offer any feedback, guidance, or support you as you work toward achieving your goals, it can be seriously detrimental to your career, says Kerr.

Taylor says if your boss seems primarily concerned with the tactical aspects of your job and project completion — and less so with whether you’re advancing your skills or being challenged by your work — they probably don’t care about your success.

Yes, he or she may just be a bad boss, but if you see they do positive things with your coworkers, but not you, it’s a bad sign.

 

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You’re not compensated fairly.

This is one of the most tangible signs, says Taylor.

“An employer that’s not concerned about what you can offer won’t compensate you properly or fairly. Even if you request a performance evaluation, you may be told it’s not necessary, or just ask any questions you may have. The suggestion may even arise that you take a pay cut.”

Monetary signs like this can be blatant red flags that you should start job searching, or you can hurt your long-term career advancement, not to mention experience much distress, she explains.

 

You’re passed over for a promotion you deserve. 

This is another blatant sign. You’re doing excellent work — work that is superior to your colleagues’ — and yet someone less deserving gets a promotion you were in line for.

 

They never ask you for input or ideas.

If your boss or employer doesn’t care about your ideas or opinions, they probably don’t care much about you, says Kerr.

 

Your calls for help or resources are ignored. 

A company that doesn’t care about your well-being will largely ignore your requests for assistance or tools you need to deliver the best results, Taylor says. “Or they may just make it difficult by making false promises, or dragging out the process to truly address your needs.”

There’s a lack of inherent trust.

“For example, if your boss is more concerned about getting a doctor’s note to justify your absence from work rather than asking about your health and what they can do for you, this obviously reveals concern for you only as a commodity,” Kerr explains.

 

Plum projects no longer come your way.

You may suddenly lose a project you were handling, or you may no longer get those that relate directly to your expertise, says Taylor. These are never good signs.

Your boss bullies you.

“When they use bullying tactics or give you ultimatums, you may have a problem on your hands,” says Kerr. “Any threatening or intimidation style of behavior that is dismissive of your emotions and reactions means they really don’t care about you as a human being.”

 

You rarely find out about project outcomes.

“One red flag is that you will contribute to a project, but after it’s completed, you don’t know what the results were,” Taylor says. “You may be fortunate enough to hear it through the grapevine, but you feel as if you are not part of a larger picture.”

 

They don’t include you in any decisions.

It’s an especially bad sign when your boss is making decisions regarding your career or workload without first consulting you, Kerr says.

 

You get important company news after everyone else.

If you feel you’re the last person to hear about major company developments, you can easily feel that you don’t count. “You may hear things secondhand or by happenstance,” says Taylor. “It can kill your morale when the event directly applies to your projects.”

Your boss isn’t interested in your personal life … at all.

Some managers try to keep work relationships very professional and avoid talking or asking about your personal life — but if you notice your boss asks your colleagues about their weekends, or their kids, or their new puppies, but not yours, this is a bad sign, says Kerr.

 

You only hear from your boss when you screw up.

Here’s a big sign: You never hear praise from your boss when you do things well – which is 99% of the time. But if you make just the smallest error, you get an email or invited into their office.

“This is a key sign that they may be taking you for granted and only concerned about your work production,” Kerr says.

Nobody wants to accept your help.

“When you first sense these signs, your immediate reaction may be to contribute more and perform better — but even that may be met with resistance,” says Taylor. “Your boss seems to be circumventing you with no apparent cause. Unfortunately, when there is no explanation, the cause can be due to posturing or a land grab by managers who are rising stars, who want to see their own team members advance. Without the support of your manager, it’s hard to swim upstream.”

It’s best to take action through direct communication, while you seek greener pastures, she advises.

 

Your boss turns down your requests for a more flexible schedule or better work-life balance.

“If they consistently demonstrate a lack of concern over how working overtime might be affecting your family life, or immediately dismiss requests to switch schedules in order to attend an important family function, this can be a huge sign that they really don’t care about your personal well-being,” Kerr warns.

 

It’s hard to know where you stand.

“At companies that are political or more concerned with the bottom line, you will languish in a state of the unknown,” warns Taylor. “You can’t get prompt answers. Employers may either be complacent, expecting your long-term loyalty, or they may be on the fence as to whether to keep you on the team. The circumstances may be related to cost savings, politics, market trends, or other factors.”

Still, she says, the result can be maddening. “Studies continue to show employees would rather know they’re under-performing than remain in the dark.”

They make demands of you during holidays or your time off.

Does your boss not respect your weekends, vacations, or holidays? Requesting that you stay in constant touch or finish a project without any concern for how it might impact your time off is a bad sign they don’t care about you, says Kerr.

 

They blatantly tell you they don’t care about you.

“There are still old school managers out there who will constantly remind their employees outright that they can be easily replaced or that other people would kill to have their job,” Kerr says. “Any comments such as these that treat you only as a commodity reflect a lack of genuine interest in your personal well-being.”

 

They don’t fight to keep you.

The final sign is this: When you tell your boss you’ve been offered a job elsewhere, or that you’re exploring other opportunities, they don’t fight to keep you.

 

Businessinsider.com | March 14, 2016 |  

 

 

 

Your #Career : The Top 6 Things You Should Never Tolerate In Your Career…If you Think you Have to Compromise on Any of the These in Order to be Employed or Build a Successful Career, I Hope this Article will Get you to Think Again.

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People mistakenly believe that in these tough economic times they have to give up on their values and integrity to stay employed, but that’s simply not true. Those who are guided by a strong sense of integrity fare much better in professional life, and will be successful where others fail.

Free- Flower Sprouting

Before launching my own coaching firm, I spent 18 years in corporate life, in publishing, marketing and membership services. I rose to the level of VP, and managed global initiatives, sizable staffs and multimillion-dollar budgets. Some of it was fulfilling, and I was considered “successful.” But much of it, especially at the end, was not good, healthy, positive or rewarding. In fact, the last few years of corporate work were full of toxicity. From backstabbing colleagues, to substandard leadership, to unethical practices, there were things I witnessed and participated in that, today, I would never, for a second, tolerate or accept. I’ve grown up.

In my career coaching work over 10,000 professionals in 10 years, I see every day in their lives and careers these same challenges repeated over and over – that they’ve compromised themselves and their integrity to get a paycheck, to keep a job, to be promoted, or to achieve what they think is success or financial “security.” And it’s making them depressed, ill and disillusioned. But six of these challenges rise to the top as the most egregious and damaging.

Here are the top 6 things you should never tolerate in your work or career.

1- Allowing someone to abuse or harass you

 There was one experience I faced in my corporate life that could only be called sexual harassment. One executive two levels above me made personal, sexually inappropriate requests and suggestions to me that made me terribly uncomfortable, and were way beyond acceptable. The implication was that if I did what he suggested, he would favor me and send important, lucrative business my way (worth millions).

It was one of the toughest periods of my professional life because I simply had no idea how to successfully navigate through it. If I said “no” to him, my business (and I) would be hurt, as he was known to make life difficult for people who didn’t do what he said. If I complained to HR (whom I didn’t trust), I would be hurt there too, because he was deeply ensconced in the company and wouldn’t be reprimanded. In the end I declined his suggestions, but I’ll never forget how victimized and trapped I felt.

What to do instead? Never allow someone to abuse or harass you. Ever. Get outside help immediately if this happens, and obtain the expert support and guidance you need to help you navigate through these challenges with the help of someone with power and authority in your corner.

What are you tolerating that you’re ready to say “no” to?

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2- Giving up everything for money

Money – and our relationship with it — is a topic that’s spawned millions of books, articles and seminars. Many struggle each day with maintaining a healthy balance and appropriate power dynamic with money, and many fail. Countless professionals give up their souls for money – not because they are necessarily struggling to pay the bills, but often because they’ve become enslaved by their lifestyle and the need to impress (and their need to feed their sense of worthiness through money). These folks have forgotten what they’re capable of, and that they’re here at this time not to just pay the bills, acquire things, and keep up with the Joneses. I’m not saying that fulfilling your financial obligations isn’t important – it is. I am saying that you are much more than your paycheck or bank account. And you can find work that both feeds your soul AND brings you the money you need.

What to do instead? Get out of denial and recognize when you’ve sacrificed your soul for money. It’s clear when it’s happened – you’re in a painful, debilitating state that you can’t ignore, and no amount of money will heal it. (Here’s more about transforming your wealth programming.)

3- Abandoning your self-respect

Recently, a client of mine shared this:

 “I’m feeling so much pressure to be the kind of manager and leader I dislike intensely. I’m not allowed to spend my time developing people, or to give them the training and help I want to give them, to support their growth. I’m told I have to manage and behave in a certain way that feels really wrong for me, and I just don’t know what to do about it. When I push for what I believe is right, I’m either ignored, shut down, or I’m not considered a team player. I don’t like who I’ve become here.”

I’ve lived this too – that the way I was expected to behave, communicate and act in a certain corporate culture – as a manager or a leader – made me lose all self-respect.

What to do instead? If you feel that you’ve lost your self-respect, you need to make some significant shifts in how you are operating in the world and what you’re allowing. Often we’re in this situation because we don’t understand the tremendous value we offer, or the great talents and skills we possess. We see only what’s at the tip of our nose, and not the bigger picture of who we are and can be in the working world. If this resonates with you, you’ll need to learn how to honor yourself more deeply, and adhere to what you believe and know. If you can’t do that in your current job, start interviewing and find a better job that’s a better fit. It’s doable but you have to start.

4- Lowering your standards of integrity

I view “standards of integrity” as core principles and values that guide our behavior. Integrity is a choice, and while it is influenced by a myriad of factors (your culture, upbringing, peer influences, etc.), if you behave in ways that are out of alignment with your integrity, you’ll suffer. One who has strong and well-defined standards of integrity behaves with wholeness, integration, honesty, and does right by himself/herself and by others. Standards of integrity involve values and virtues such as honesty, kindness, trust, wisdom, loyalty, transparency, objectivity, acceptance, openness, empathy, and graciousness.

In these past few years, I’ve witnessed so many people in midlife awaken as if from a deep sleep to realize that they’ve compromised their most core values in order to get ahead in their work or retain jobs they hate. It hurts them to realize that they’ve walked away from who they are, and what they value and cherish most.

 What to do instead? Identify your top values (here’s a great values exercise, courtesy of the Connecticut Women’s Business Development Council) and begin to honor those more deeply in all the work you do. Move away from work and people who don’t align with your top values.

5- Disregarding your health and well-being

In my teleclasses and workshops, I see hundreds of high-level professional women who are brilliant, achievement-oriented and accomplished, but at the same time exhausted, depleted, and depressed. In the pursuit of a great career, they’ve compromised their health and well-being. Much of this has to do with the ever-complicated issue of work-life balance and how to stay competitive and ahead of the curve. But to me, it’s much more. Sacrificing your health and well-being demonstrates your lack of prioritizing yourself as important, failing to understand that you need to care and restore for yourself every day – and yes,put yourself first — before you can be of true service to anyone else, your business, your family or your employer. If your body is shutting down, diseased or debilitated because of how you work, rapid change is needed.

What to do instead?  Find ways to be kinder and more caring to yourself, with behaviors you can sustain over time. Start putting yourself first rather than last. Read Gretchen Rubin’s great book Better Than Before to learn more about your personal tendencies that shape how you see the world, and how you can build healthier, life-nourishing habits that lead to a happier life.

6- Ignoring your life purpose

Finally, the saddest professionals I’ve met haven’t taken the time to uncover their passions, or identify what gives their life meaning and purpose. I’m continually stunned when, in my Amazing Career Project course, members share that they don’t have a clue what they’re passionate or even excited about in life. If you don’t know what you’re passionate about, or understand the amazing talents you possess that you can leverage to make a difference in the world, you simply can’t build a career that will bring joy and fulfillment.

What to do instead?  Begin to think about what you’d like your legacy to be. What do you want to be able to say about yourself when you’re 90 years old looking back — what you’ve stood for, given, taught, imparted, and left behind. Not what you dreamed of being, but what you have been. Think about the impact you want to make – on your family, friends, community and the world.

In addition, think about what you do each day that you can’t not do, even when you’re not getting paid for it. (Thanks to Gretchen Rubin for reminding me of this yesterday). For me, for instance, I love to write, explore ideas, problem-solve, help others, learn about what makes humans tick, and use my voice in a public way (I’m a singer as well as a speaker). What you can’t NOT do is a clue to what gives your life juice, purpose and meaning.

So many professionals forget that they have this one chance to build a life that’s meaningful and purposeful for them.   Instead, they compromise their potential impact and legacy in a vain effort to grasp “success,” accolades, security, or power. (If you want to clarify your own desired legacy, values, passions, standards of integrity and more, take my Career Path Self-Assessment).

* * * * *

If you think you have to compromise on any of the above in order to be employed or build a successful career, I hope you’ll think again. I’ve lived the pain of losing myself in the processing of building my professional life. I finally learned that, despite all our best efforts, you can never create the success, fulfillment and reward you long for if you to say “no” to who you really are.

What are you tolerating that you’re ready to say “no” to?

 

Forbes.com | January 30, 2016 | Kathy Caprino

 

Your #Career : How To Wow A Job Interviewer When Changing Careers…The Trick is to Convince an Employer that your “Old” Skills/Experiences Can be Just as or even More Valuable in a New Industry or Role.

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According to a new AARP survey, four out of 10 experienced workers will be looking for a job this year, and of those, a quarter are considering a complete career change. If you’re one of those eager to change careers in 2016, what can you do to improve your odds of success?

Free- Budding Vine

The trick is to convince an employer that your “old” skills and experiences can be just as — or even more — valuable in a new industry or role. Or, as my colleague Kathryn Sollmann, founder of the career advisory firm 9 Lives for Women (and an expert on women’s career change issues), puts it: “You can change industries when you connect the dots.”

The Connect the Dots Approach
I find Sollmann’s “connect the dots” approach spot-on (pardon the pun).

Once you thoroughly research your desired field, learn its lingo and identify commonalities between your previous experiences and your target employer’s needs, you’ll know which accomplishments and experiences to highlight during the interview process and on your resumé. In turn, you’ll be more likely to convince prospective hiring managers that your skills really do transfer well.

“The fact is that it’s easier for employers to settle into default mode and hire cookie-cutter candidates who all have the same background and experience. The trick is to remind employers that quick studies can learn the language of a new industry. Then through research and networking, prove you know the very specific ways your skills can be transferred to get the job done.”

In her instructive blog post detailing this “connect the dots” method, Sollmann shared the steps she took early in her career to progress from being a newly minted college grad with an English degree (aka Unemployment 101) to a job editing and writing training programs for a Big 8 accounting firm to tripling her salary in a job as a conference organizer for an investment publication.

 

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To summarize, Sollmann successfully made the leap between industries by doing two key things:

She thoroughly researched the specific needs of employers in her target industry.

She carefully reframed her experience in a way that proved to employers that her skills and experiences were relevant to their industry.

In other words, she made it really easy for employers to understand why they needed her.Continued from page 1

“I didn’t just say that I had the research, writing and event planning skills to do the job. I connected the dots, showing that the way I applied skills to responsibilities X, Y and Z for the training job would be applied the same way to do A, B and C in the conference-planning job,” writes Sollmann.

How to Research and Network Well

Research and networking are especially critical before you enter a job interview to change careers; they’ll help you know what to say to convince the interviewer that your seemingly inappropriate background is actually a great fit.

So I asked Sollmann how to dig up what you need to persuade an employer in another field to hire you. Here’s her advice:

Identify through LinkedIn, school alumni networks, and elsewhere a few people who work in the field you want to switch into. Then, ask for a 15-minute phone appointment with each to help you understand how you can prove that your skills are transferable.

 Before you meet for this informational interview, distill your expertise into three or four major skill areas. Then, during your talk, bring up a major project or initiative you worked on that exemplified these skills and ask about parallels to the initiatives where these contacts work.

Some questions you might want to ask during your phone calls:

  • How is your type of expertise used where they work?
  • Did most of the employees “grow up” at this employer?
  • Does the firm or nonprofit value having employees with varying professional backgrounds and perspectives?
  • Can you connect me with someone who was hired from an entirely different industry so I can find out how they adapted?

Cutting Through the Cookie Cutter Mentality

If this sounds like a lot of work, well, it is. But this informational-interview research will increase your likelihood of finding appropriate job opportunities and help you make your strongest case to hiring managers.

As Sollmann concludes in her post: “The fact is that it’s easier for employers to settle into default mode and hire cookie-cutter candidates who all have the same background and experience. The trick is to remind employers that quick studies can learn the language of a new industry. Then through research and networking, prove you know the very specific ways your skills can be transferred to get the job done.”

Good luck with your career switch in 2016!

 

Forbes.com |  January 25, 2016 | Nancy Collamer, CONTRIBUTOR

 

Your #Career : How Winning Professionals Manage The Three Eras Of Their Careers…How Winning Professionals Manage their Careers through Lifetime Eras—Early, Mid, & Later Career, or Roughly Speaking, in your 20s, 30s, & then 40s & Beyond.”

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If you cut your finger, reach for a Band-Aid. Wake up with a headache, grab two aspirins. But quick remedies aren’t a regime for managing overall health. Nor for managing a career. You can power pose like Wonder Woman to boost your self-confidence, or  tweak your mornings to be more productive. Helpful stuff, but not the same as a conscious, long-term plan to develop professionally over a lifetime.

Free- Bridge in Fog

OK, how to think about that?

I recently put that question to Kathy Gallo, Founder and Managing Partner of theGoodstone Group. Kathy has developed business professionals for some twenty years, and now oversees a global network of 65 professionals who coach leaders at all levels, in companies ranging from start-ups to Fortune 50 corporations. She answered with an eager smile.

Learning From Patterns

“Well, we shouldn’t paint with too broad a brush. Everyone must build their own plan over time. But you can learn from patterns, for example how winning professionals manage their careers through lifetime eras—early, mid, and later career, or roughly speaking, in your 20s, 30s, and then 40s and beyond.”

Gallo began with a few cross-cutting themes. “Throughout a career, three leadership competencies are always a focus: problem-solving, executional capabilities, and people skills, especially “emotional intelligence” (leaders’ ability to read other people and connect it with what’s inside their own head and heart.) Then context—being aware of your organization’s culture; and changing it for the better when you can. Great performers work on all of these in every era.”

 

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Because It’s Different Today

Listening to this prologue, I had a whiff of Mom’s apple pie, and asked: Is professional development really different today? The Goodstone Managing Partner pushed back. “Yeah, it is. The best jobs are much more competitive—twenty top-qualified people are going for every good position. And candidates are already well-coached—it’s how they excelled in college admissions, sports, music lessons. The most successful are now constantly improving themselves in a fiercely intentional way.”

So how does the game change as you move through the three eras?

Kathy described the classic matrix pairing consciousness and competence. “The best competitors co-develop self-knowledge and capabilities. At each step they are working to understand more about themselves and their goals, and the skills and knowledge needed to get there.”

Your 20s: Building Baseline Awareness And Competence

“Imagine a child first learning to walk,” she continued. “Not only does she not know how to tie a shoe, she doesn’t understand that shoes need to be tied. In your early jobs, you’re both learning what success in a would-be career is going to take, and then assessing your assets and gaps against that. The average performer bumbles along, trial-and-error. The top professionals are much more intentional.”

Kathy elaborated. “The rising stars relentlessly clarify expectations for winning. They are metrics-oriented, and constantly seek feedback, from supervisors, other colleagues, even clients. They develop a picture of success, then go after it. They ask, ‘if I want to head a sales division, what do l I need to do?’”

Are You Ready To Hear The Feedback?

But it’s not as simple as it sounds, she added. “Most organizations are not very good at giving feedback— timely, critical, actionable—which is what you need to raise your personal performance. In most cultures you have to work hard to get that kind of feedback. Women and multicultural talent usually have to work even harder for it.”

She offered a further warning. “Younger professionals often don’t want to hear the answer if it’s negative. They aren’t emotionally ready to hear anything less than ‘awesome.’” So success in your early career depends on learning both to seek and take feedback. And then building the discipline to act and improve upon what you learn.”

Gallo then noted the importance of recruiting sponsors, informal or otherwise. “As you start to grow, you need some“As you start to grow one with power and credibility in the organization who can advocate for you—to get you staffed on the right projects. As with getting feedback, this is particularly critical and often more difficult for young women and multicultural professionals.”

But even enlisting support has its pitfalls. “Millennials are so social-media-wired, they’re always reaching out for help and suggestions. But they can lack discrimination—they don’t realize that some sources aren’t as reliable as others. Or that friends may not be totally candid. It’s a big issue for young CEOs. They buttress their managerial inexperience with all sorts of advisers. But they aren’t critical enough in choosing or using them. Great professional development in your twenties depends on learning how to judge and leverage the right people.”

Your 30s: Rounding Out Your Skill Set

Kathy continued the metaphor of the newly walking child. “So in the next era you know how to put on your shoes, you can loop the laces and tie them on your own. Now you want to get good at it, so it becomes automatic.”

“In your middle career,” she went on to explain, “you’re now established in at least one of the three leadership competences; and you’re clearer about aspirations and what it will take to get there. You develop plans to better leverage your strengths, and also address your particular short-comings.”

I pressed this coach for the real headline.

“For most people,” Kathy continued, “this middle phase means strengthening EQ. Typically they’re getting their first 360 evaluations. And they’re shocked to learn that maybe they have a reputation for being difficult, uncaring, or communicating poorly. It can be a real wake-up call—but the winners hear it and work on the problems.”

It’s also in this middle era that the best professionals start to look beyond themselves. As Gallo explained, “Even if people work on their EQ, progress can be limited by the culture of the organization. Some companies don’t care if you run over people to get results.”

So what then?

Kathy continued: “Losers are complainers. Winners face reality. You don’t have to be a jerk to succeed, but you do need to understand the cultural context. Sometimes that means getting better at playing the game (authenticity can be over-rated!); or better yet, changing the culture by bringing in more like-minded people. If necessary, they’re willing to leave for another company more suited to their values.”

Your 40s (And Beyond): Impact And Still More Self-Knowledge

Great maturing professionals don’t sit back and smell the roses—they continue the self-improvement that’s by now second nature. They seek out new assignments, different experiences, and look for innovative ways to “sharpen their saws.”

But, Gallo cautioned, they now face a different set of challenges. “Accomplished leaders are under more pressure to create impact; they have to project a certain gravitas, inspire talent, excite and align stakeholders, as never before. It’s a world of maximum transparency and like it or not, leaders today must have some level of charisma. And not just CEOs—everyone on their way to the top too.”

I asked the enduring question—can charisma be learned?

“Yes, up to a point,” she offered. “You can do a lot by working on public speaking, posture and style. But charisma can mean different things. The real strategy comes down to finding and developing the right version that suits who you are. If you’re more introverted or analytical, for example, you can get better in projecting confidence and impressing stakeholders with your expertise; or learning to speak more openly and firmly about yourself. If you’re an internal candidate for a top job, you can seek out a particularly difficult assignment, to show your courage and skill for tackling a big problem. That’s worth more to a board search committee than ‘flashy showmanship.’”

The Potentially Isolated Leader

Kathy continued with a final warning. “Another challenge for senior professionals is difficult and even dangerous. Successful leaders can become isolated without knowing it. People shy away from disagreeing with them, or won’t ‘speak truth to power.’  So suddenly these leaders are back to where they started twenty-five years before: they’re ‘unconsciously incompetent’, they no longer know what they don’t know—and nobody is going to tell them. If the world is changing around them, or they’re creating dysfunction in the organization they lead, they might be totally oblivious. They think everything is fine, when it might be catastrophe. Great leaders force themselves to keep learning, including the hardest of truths about themselves.”

Kathy finished by reflecting on one particularly effective CEO she knows. “He’s at the top of his game, but he won’t let up, even though he realizes more self-knowledge could be pretty painful. I’ll never forget what he confided to me: ‘If I want to be the best possible leader, I have to be willing to travel to the ‘Dark Side’—the part of who I am that I really don’t like. And then commit to improving that too.”

 

Forbes.com | January 16, 2016 | Brook Manville

Your #Career : 5 Big #Networking Mistakes That Can Hurt Your Career…The Reality is that most #JobOpenings are Never Advertised or Posted. In fact, 63% of Job Seekers Land New Jobs through Networking

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Networking is one of the most important things you can do to nurture your career. Whether you love getting out there and selling yourself or dread the task of making small talk, failing to network effectively will leave you spinning your wheels as far as finding a new job or advancing in your current one.

Free- Utilty Lines

People everywhere struggle with the most basic aspects of networking. What gives us the most trouble? Roughly a third of job seekers said they had trouble picking out who they should try to network with, a 2014 Lee Hecht Harrison survey found. One quarter said they didn’t have a focused networking strategy, and roughly the same number said making initial contact with people over phone and email was their biggest stumbling block.

“The reality is that most job openings are never advertised or posted, which means tapping your network is anessential job search resource to uncover hidden opportunities. In fact, 63% of job seekers land new jobs through networking,” said Greg Simpson, Senior Vice President, Career Transition Practice Leader at Lee Hecht Harrison. “Developing a strong network and fruitful relationships takes real work. Individuals must be proactive and devote time to building and nurturing a strong career network of contacts.”

 Once you get over those initial networking hurdles, more trouble awaits. From not being able to effectively exploit your networking to focusing too much on yourself, here are five of the biggest networking mistakes people make.

1. Not asking for help

No one will know that you’re searching for a job if you don’t tell them. Yet too many people seem reluctant to broadcast that they’re looking to make a career change. Forty-two percent of senior managers surveyed by OfficeTeam in 2014 said not asking for help was the biggest networking mistake they saw people make.

“People may not ask those in their networks for help because they’re embarrassed or think they can succeed on their own,” said Robert Hosking, executive director of OfficeTeam, in a statement. “But whether you’re looking to land a new job or build your visibility, every connection counts.”

2. Not having a pitch

Putting together a canned “elevator speech” can feel a bit cheesy and inauthentic. But if you’re going to network, you need to be able to quickly explain to people who you are, what you do, and what you’re looking for. The key is making your pitch sound natural.

“The problem with most elevator pitches is that they get crafted on paper but not adjusted to sound like how a real person speaks,” wrote communication and behavior expert Deborah Grayson Riegel in an article for Fast Company. Riegel suggests practicing your pitch out loud and using the simplest language possible. You should also be able to tailor your pitch based on who you’re speaking to and be willing to forgo it entirely if working the information into the conversation would be awkward.

 

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3. Only networking online

Online networking is essential these days – 35% of employers surveyed by CareerBuilder in 2015 said they were less likely to interview people who didn’t have an online presence. But for most people, having 500+ LinkedIn connections and hundreds of Twitter or Instagram followers isn’t going to substitute for meeting people in person. Instead, you need to work to make those virtual connections pay off in the real world.

“As networking becomes synonymous with online networking … [fusion_builder_container hundred_percent=”yes” overflow=”visible”][fusion_builder_row][fusion_builder_column type=”1_1″ background_position=”left top” background_color=”” border_size=”” border_color=”” border_style=”solid” spacing=”yes” background_image=”” background_repeat=”no-repeat” padding=”” margin_top=”0px” margin_bottom=”0px” class=”” id=”” animation_type=”” animation_speed=”0.3″ animation_direction=”left” hide_on_mobile=”no” center_content=”no” min_height=”none”][people] can neglect the importance of actually meeting up with people for coffee, making a phone call, or showing up at an event. So far online connections have not supplanted these traditional interactions,” James Jeffries, the director of career development at Bard College of Simon’s Rock, told Time magazine.

4. Only talking about work

When networking, don’t restrict yourself to shop talk. Whether you’re attending a business mixer or just happen to bump into a contact at the coffee shop, be prepared to chat about subjects other than your career. People are more likely to help and hire people they like and relate to, and letting your personality shine through will allow you to build real relationships with your contacts.

If you’re attending a networking event where you’ll be meeting people for the first time, “come up with a few questions as ice breakers,” etiquette expert Jacqueline Whitmore told Inc. magazine. “My typical go-to questions always revolve around food and travel, because everybody loves to eat and most everybody loves to travel.” Whether you’re just getting to know someone or reconnecting with an old colleague, remember that networking is a social activity; keep the conversation professional, but fun.

5. Not offering to help others

Networking is a two-way street, yet too many people go into it with a “What’s in it for me?” attitude. A more effective approach is to focus on what you can offer other people. If someone you meet mentions they need someone to help with their taxes, and you have an accountant you love, recommend her – you’ve made two people happy (and yourself look good) in the process. Let the intern pick your brain when he asks — you never know where he could end up being able to do you a favor. Building goodwill in this way can pay off big later when you need to tap your network for support.

“With any relationship, there is a cycle of giving and receiving,” Selena Soo, the founder of branding consultancy S2 Groupe, told Fast Company. “If you lead with taking, you won’t be successful because it will turn people off. But people who give to their social circles naturally reap benefits.”

Follow Megan on Twitter @MeganE_CS

 

CheatSheet.com | December 9, 2015 | Megan Elliott

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#Strategy : 12 Mind Tricks That Make People Like You And Help You Get Ahead…With Minimal Effort on your Part, their Unconscious Influence on Behavior can Make a Huge Difference in your Day-to-Day Life.

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When you’re working hard and doing all you can to achieve your goals, anything that can give you an edge is powerful and will streamline your path to success.  Mind tricks won’t make you a Jedi, but using the brain’s natural quirks to your advantage can have a positive impact on everyone you encounter.

Free- Man at Desktop

None of these tricks are deceitful or disingenuous, except for number six, and I trust that you’ll only use that one with good reason.  As soon as you become aware of these 12 tricks, they start popping up wherever you look. With minimal effort on your part, their unconscious influence on behavior can make a huge difference in your day-to-day life.

1. When a group of people laughs, each member of the group can’t help but make eye contact with the person they feel closest to

This trick can make you an astute observer of relationships of all types. It can tell you which members of your team are bonding and learning to trust one another, just as easily as it can tell you if you might have a shot at landing a date with a certain someone. Of course, you’ll learn a lot about how you feel about other people just by paying attention to whom you make eye contact with.

 

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2. When someone does a favor for you, it actually makes them likeyou more

When you convince someone to do you a favor, they unconsciously justify why they are willing to do so. Typical justifications include things such as “he’s my friend,” “I like him,” and “he seems like the kind of person who would return the favor.” These justifications serve you perfectly. Not only did you just get help with something, but the other party also likes you more than they did before.

3. Silence gets answers

When you ask someone a question and they’re slow to respond, don’t feel pressure to move the conversation forward. Remaining silent plays to your advantage. Moments of silence make people feel as though they should speak, especially when the ball is in their court. This is a great tool to use in negotiations and other difficult conversations. Just make certain you resist the urge to move the conversation forward until you get your answer.

4. Open hands and palms create trust

There’s an employee policy at LEGOLAND that says whenever someone asks where something is, the employee “presents” (open-palm gesture) their directions instead of “pointing” them. This is because the open-palmed gesture conveys trust, making people more likely to agree with what you’re saying and to find you friendly and likeable. Pointing, on the flip side, is generally seen as aggressive and rude.

5. Nodding your head during a conversation or when asking a question makes the other person more likely to agree with what you’re saying

The next time you need to win someone over to your way of thinking, try nodding your head as you speak. People unconsciously mirror the body language of those around them in order to better understand what other people are feeling. When you nod your head as you speak, you convey that what you’re saying is true and desirable, and people are more inclined to agree with you.

6. If you have to tell a lie, add embarrassing details to make it more believable

The more detailed a lie is, the more likely people are to believe it. When you add detail, people begin to put a picture to your story. When you includeembarrassing details, the picture becomes all the more vivid and believable. After all, if you were going to make up a story, you would be much more inclined to make yourself look good.

7. People remember unfinished things better

The natural tendency to remember unfinished things is called the Zeigarnik effect. Ever notice how some television commercials get cut off early? The company paying for the commercial cuts it off so that it sticks in your head longer than other commercials. The best way to forget unfinished things (commercials or songs) is to finish them in your head. If a song gets stuck in your head, try singing the last lines to yourself. You’ll be amazed how quickly it goes away.

8. Chew gum to relax and focus

Chewing gum actually lowers your cortisol levels, the hormone responsible for stress. But chewing gum doesn’t just reduce stress, it also makes you more alert and improves your performance in memory-oriented tasks. It does so by increasing the blood flow to your brain and alerting your senses. When you experience a stressful situation while chewing gum, your body is less likely to go into the primal fight-or-flight mode (which results in poor decisions and inability to focus).

9. People’s feet reveal their interest

When talking to someone, pay attention to their feet. If their feet are aimed at you, they’re interested and listening to what you’re saying, but if their feet point away from you, they’re most likely disinterested and mentally checked out.

10. When you meet someone new, work their name into the conversation in order to remember it

The goal here is to repeat their name three times in the first five minutes. It works extremely well, but the trick is to do it naturally. When you rattle off their name unnecessarily, it sounds foolish and awkward. Try to use phrases like “Hello ____,” “Nice to meet you _____,” and “Where are you from _____.”

11. Showing excitement makes other people like you

This one goes back to the idea that we mirror the behavior of those around us. If you show excitement when you see someone, they naturally mirror that excitement back at you. It’s an easy way to make a strong first impression and to get people to like you.

12. Maintain eye contact for 60% of a conversation

The key to eye contact is balance. While it’s important to maintain eye contact, doing so 100% of the time is perceived as aggressive and creepy. At the same time, if you only maintain eye contact for a small portion of the conversation, you’ll come across as disinterested, shy, or embarrassed. Maintaining eye contact for roughly 60% of a conversation comes across as interested, friendly, and trustworthy.

Bringing It All Together

Give these tricks a try, and you’re bound to notice a difference in how people respond to you.

Have you ever tried any of these? Please share your thoughts in the comments section below as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.

 

Forbes.com | December 3, 2015 | Travis Bradberry

#Leadership : I Wish I Knew Then: 6 Power Women Share Most Valuable Career Advice …”Surround Yourself with People Who are Smarter than You. You Should Never Be the Smartest Person in the Room. Worry if you Are. ” -Jessica Alba, Founder & Chief Creative Officer, The Honest Co.

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What if you had the opportunity to ask today’s most successful leaders to identify the single most important lesson they’ve learned on a given topic? And what if those same leaders were willing to drill down on their personal experiences and share key insights in an honest and relevant way? My guess is that it would be a game-changer for many of us.

 

“The One Thing” is a new series dedicated to tapping into the wisdom of today’s most dynamic thinkers and ‘doers’. What’s ‘The One Thing’…. about career success, or work-life wellness, or bouncing back from failure…that you absolutely need to know in order to better navigate those types of events in your own life? This series will be a one-stop, go-to guide for women who are looking to embrace the success strategies of proven leaders, across industries and across generations.

Everybody can benefit from a mentor. And while we can’t hit fast forward on personal experience, we can draw on the life lessons of others to enhance our growth or simply help us manage all that we’re looking to accomplish each and every day.

“Surround yourself with people who are smarter than you. You should never be the smartest person in the room. Worry if you are. ”

–Jessica Alba, Founder & Chief Creative Officer, The Honest Co.

Have A Bias For Action

“I would echo what my mother told me, ‘You’ve got to have a bias for action.’ The hockey coaches and the basketball coaches always say, “You will miss a hundred percent of the shots that you never take.” My mother encouraged me to try things that I wasn’t sure I could do. Over my life, I’ve been able to try things, many of which have worked that I didn’t necessarily think they would. Be brave. The price of inaction is far greater than the cost of making a mistake. ”

–Meg Whitman, CEO, HP

 

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Leadership Is All About Adaptability

“Darwin said those who survive are neither the strongest nor the most intelligent, it’s those that can adapt to change. And I wish I had thought about that when I was younger because it always seemed to me that you had to be the brightest or the strongest. There’s something to be said for adapting to change. That doesn’t mean abandoning your values, but it does mean recognizing that the environment has changed and absorbing that .”

-Anne Finucane, Vice Chairman and Global Chief Strategy and Marketing Officer,Bank of America BAC +0.00%

Stay Open To Opportunity

“Be ready. Just be ready.  You just don’t know what opportunity might be out there.  It may not even be a path that they were thinking of.  But other people see your possibilities there.  I never intended to run for Congress.  I never intended to run for leadership.  Other people came to me to encourage me to do so.  And I was ready.”

–Nancy Pelosi, House Democratic Leader, The U.S. House of Representatives

Stay True To You

“I would say always, to thyself be true. We’re all born with what we have. Take what you have and do the best you can with it . Know who you are…Feel your way through life. Don’t over-think your way through life, because I think we’re all guilty of that.

–Angela Ahrendts, Senior Vice President of Retail and Online Stores, Apple

It’s All Going To Be Ok

 “I would tell myself to relax, that everything works out the way it’s supposed to. If you look back on your life at the things that you stressed out, ‘Oh my gosh, he didn’t ask me out, he didn’t call, I didn’t get that job, I lost that job,’ quite often in the end when one door closes, another one opens. Everything, even though you don’t believe it at the time, works out the way it’s supposed to–the good and the bad.

–Gayle King, Editor-at-Large, O, The Oprah Magazine; Co-Host, CBS This Morning

 

Forbes.com | September 28, 2015 | Moira Forbes

Your #Career : 6 Career Tips that Will Make You Future-Proof…Ask for Feedback of the Perfect Person Doing the Perfect Job in your Role,You’ll get Feedback you can Use.

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How can you tell whose career advice you can trust? Is she a human resources expert who has written the book on creating attractive workplaces for top talent? Is she a personal development expert who’s written the book on acquiring new skills today for the office of tomorrow?

 

“Ask for feedback of the perfect person doing the perfect job in your role,” Karie Willyerd said. “You’ll get feedback you can use.”

Karie Willyerd is. The SuccessFactors workplace futurist has co-authored The 2020 Workplace: How Innovative Companies Attract, Develop, and Keep Tomorrow’s Employees Today and Stretch: How to Future Proof Yourself for Tomorrow’s Workplace — after co-founding what is now the SAP Jam platformand serving as the chief learning officer of Sun Microsystems.

Willyerd shared six tips for personal growth during her “Future Proof Yourself for Tomorrow’s Workplace” breakout session at SuccessConnect 2015 last month:

 

No. 1: Pick a Couple of Projects to Approach from a Development Stance

“Take the five to seven projects that you’ve got,” Willyerd said, “and think about, ‘What stage am I at?’”

Most of those projects will be stuff that just needs to get done, but one or two will deserve a Development Stance, Willyerd stated. That’s because they parallel our career trajectory, making us want to learn more about them via an in-depth certification course, a 15-minute conversation with an expert, or something in between.

Prioritizing what’s on your to-do list is the crucial first step.

“Just by thinking about it,” Willyerd said, “you will learn more.”

 

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No. 2: Get the Right Feedback — From the Right People

“The people who are full of the most feedback that you need are your peers,” Willyerd said. “That’s why peers rate you the hardest”

Create some distance between you and the peers you seek out, Willyerd stated. Make it safe for the people giving feedback to you — not safe for yourself.

“Ask for feedback of the perfect person doing the perfect job in your role,” Willyerd said. “You’ll get feedback you can use.”

No. 3: Identify Your “Five to Thrive”

“This isn’t your mentor; this isn’t your boss,” Willyerd said. “These are just five people who make you a better person at work.”

It’s all right if you can’t think of five people right away, according to Willyerd. But once you’ve got your list, try to meet with each person on it at least four times per year.

No. 4: Get In Over Your Head

“You need to feel like you’re in over your head,” Willyerd said. “If you’re not, you’re not stretching.” (Remember the name of Willyerd’s second book?)

In over your head feels like you’re not sure you can do the job, according to Willyerd. Staying in your comfort zone keeps you from moving to the next level of who and what you could be. So assume your Development Stance, and volunteer, travel or teach a seminar.

“There are all kinds of ways that you can gain experience,” Willyerd said. “There are lots of things you can do that could stretch you out beyond what you normally do.”

No. 5: Ask your boss, “What do you hope I’ll learn from this assignment?”

“I don’t advocate that you stay working for bad bosses,” Willyerd said. “But I also don’t advocate that you stay working for comfortable bosses either because they will leave you stuck.”

Good bosses will push you to help develop your skills. Willyerd shared an example of a woman who had stayed in a role for a surprisingly long time because she liked that her manager continually took steps to help her grow. She didn’t think she’d find that anywhere else.

“It’s so easy, and it costs the company nothing if managers would just frame work in terms of what the person will learn,” Willyerd said. “If you’re on the receiving end, you can ask your boss if there’s anything he expects you to learn.”

No. 6: Announce Your Goals, Gain Supporters

“Let’s say you decide to make a big change,” Willyerd said. “You have to help people shift their thinking about you.”

Willyerd knew a man who decided to shed his well-earned reputation for being late to meetings. But arriving early to every meeting for six months didn’t change his reputation. So he began announcing before every meeting that it was a few minutes before the start time, jovially suggesting that the meeting start early.

“Once people put you in a bucket of what your behavior is, they leave you in that bucket,” Willyerd said. “Help them get out of that bucket … announce your intent to change, and then follow through with it.”

Get What You Need

Willyerd expounded on point No. 2 after her breakout session. Watch the video below for more on how to get the feedback you need.

This story originally appeared on SAP Business Trends. Follow Derek onTwitter: @DKlobucher

 

Forbes.com | September 14, 2015 | Derek Klobucher,SAP