Your #Career : 20 Negotiation Tips for Getting the Salary you Want…Negotiating your Salary Can be Awkward & Challenging — & Actually Getting the Pay you Want Often seems Impossible. But it Isn’t.

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“A job interview can be stressful, especially when it comes time to talk about money,” says etiquette expert and “Poised for Success” author Jacqueline Whitmore. “However, you can get what you want and deserve — most job seekers just aren’t sure when and how to ask for it.”

Free- Counting Abacus

To master the delicate dance that is a salary negotiation, you need to be able to push without offending the hiring manager or undercutting yourself.

Here’s how the pros do it:

Research the market.

To successfully negotiate your salary, negotiation expert Kim Keating writes in “Lean In For Graduates,” you’ll need to gather information to figure out what you’re really worth. “The time you invest can pay off in a big way. And I mean that literally,” she writes.

To protect yourself against accepting too little or asking for far too much, you can turn to sites like Glassdoor and Salary.com to determine the average compensation range for someone with your level of experience and skills and in your industry or company (or a comparable one, in terms of number of employees, revenue size, and location).

“At the end of the day, a candidate has a number in mind as to what they think they’re worth,” says Eddie R. Koller III, managing director and partner at Howard-Sloan-Koller Group, a technology and media recruiting firm. “But a company has limits to what they can spend.”

 

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Set your goals in advance.

Once you know what you’re worth, decide how much you would like to make and what’s the lowest offer you’d be willing to accept.

Ivanka Trump, CEO of Ivanka Trump Collection, says knowing what you want to achieve before heading into a negotiation is “the golden rule” for negotiating — but most people ignore it.

“Without a plan, you allow the opposing party to define your goals instead of the other way around,” she writes on Motto.

Don’t talk money until the interview process is over.

If you can delay discussing pay until there’s an offer on the table, you should.

“Once they’ve decided that they have to have you, only then are you in the position to negotiate,” says Dan Martineau, president of Martineau Recruiting Technology, a firm specializing in IT executive positions.

If your interviewer tries to talk about salary early on, Martineau tells Business Insider that the best thing to do is to tell the interviewer you would like to defer a conversation about compensation until after the company has had a chance to evaluate whether you’re the right fit for them.

Open with something personal.

As previously reported on Business Insider, in an experiment where Kellogg and Stanford students negotiated by email, those who shared unrelated personal details over the course of the negotiation — hobbies, hometowns, etc. — ended up getting significantly better results than those who kept things to name, email, and the dry monetary details.

Opening up a bit sends a signal that you’re trustworthy, according to Grant, and it makes it more likely that they’ll reciprocate.

Don’t ever disclose your current salary.

Revealing your salary history has the potential to negatively affect your income for your entire career.

“I would never, ever disclose my current salary or salary history to a prospective employer, even if it means ending the interview process,” writes recruiter and “Ask the Headhunter” author, Nick Corcodilos. “That is my advice to job hunters.”

If an interviewer asks what your current salary is, Corcodilos suggests politely but firmly declining to disclose your salary history by saying something along the lines of, “I’d be glad to help you assess what I’d be worth to your business by showing you what I can do for you, but my salary is personal and confidential, just as the salaries of your own employees are.”

Liz Ryan, founder and CEO of consulting firm The Human Workplace, recommends in a post on LinkedIn answering the question indirectly by giving your target salary range instead.

“How are you ever going to increase your earnings if every time you change jobs, you get a tiny raise over what they paid you at the last place?” she asks.

Be prepared to prove your value …

Don’t be afraid to toot your own horn a little.

“Be prepared to prove your value to the employer,” says Whitmore. “Have all of your facts and figures in order. Come prepared with a list of your qualifications, accomplishments (personal and professional), how you saved your last company money or increased your company’s bottom line, and why you are the one best suited for the job.”

 

… but only provide a couple reasons for your request.

“When preparing to make a first offer, people often overcorrect,” writes Wharton professor Adam Grant. “They’re so concerned about justifying their positions that they marshal as many reasons as possible.”

Grant points to research that found skilled negotiators averaged fewer than two reasons per argument, compared with three reasons per argument from the non-experts.

He explains that more reasons can dilute an argument, especially if some are weaker than others. And presenting too many reasons can convey a lack of confidence, “making clear that we’re uncertain of the legitimacy of our offer. An effective first offer is best supported by one or two compelling reasons,” Grant says.

Be excited, but not desperate.

You should reiterate your excitement and stay positive, but don’t be so excited that you seem desperate. You have no idea how many other candidates the hiring manager is interviewing so play it cool, says Martineau.

“Desperate is problematic. Eager is not. I want people who are eager and excited,” he says. “It’s only a good investment on my end if it’s a good investment on your end.”

However, Koller says that showing the employer that you’re excited about working for the company does make them more inclined to give you want you want.

Make the first offer.

As conventional wisdom goes, you should wait for the other party to make the initial offer in order to get more information to act on.

In reality, Grant says it’s much better to make the first offer because you get to set the “anchor,” the figure that affects the trajectory of the negotiation. As previously reported on Business Insider, people who make very high first offers end up with a much better result.

The first offer pulls the other person in its direction, and it’s difficult to adjust the other way.

Emphasize what the company gains by hiring you.

Recent research suggests that, when negotiating, emphasizing what you’re giving the other person as opposed to what they’re losing makes the other person more likely to concede.

Make sure you highlight what skills and experience you’re offering the company and your potential boss first, and use that to justify what you’re asking for.

Give a salary range rather than a target.

Offering a pay range instead of an exact number opens up room for discussion and shows the employer that you’re flexible. A range also “gives you a cushion,” says Martineau, in case your asking salary is too high.

“Most companies will meet you in your range, even if it’s the bottom third of that range,” he says. “Basically, if they want you, they don’t want to send the wrong message by not meeting you in that range.”

Presenting a range gives people information about what you’re actually asking for, and it makes you seem polite and reasonable — which means you’re less likely to get hit with a hard-line counteroffer.

Use odd, extremely precise numbers.

Using a weird, precise number makes sense during a negotiation. For example, instead of asking for $70,000, you’re better off asking for $68,500.

Malia Mason, lead researcher in a study published in The Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, tells Business Insider that using a precise number instead of rounded numbers will give you a solid anchor. It also gives off the appearance that you’ve done your research.

Even when giving a range, you should use precise numbers.

Pay attention to your body language.

“The way in which you carry yourself, even when seated at a desk, matters,” Trump writes. She notes that most of our communication is nonverbal and that messages are often conveyed through our facial expressions, gestures, posture, and audible elements, like sighs.

Her suggestions: Don’t fidget. Don’t pick your nails or tap your foot. Don’t sit on the edge of your seat because it could make you look overeager. Don’t hunch over and drum your nails because it could communicate aggression or frustration. Don’t cross your arms protectively because it could make you appear meek and intimidated.

“Regardless of how fast your heart may be beating, sit upright, make eye contact, and focus on breathing evenly,” Trump writes.

Mirror the other person’s behavior.

When people are getting along, they mimic one another — mirroring each other’s accents, speech patterns, facial expressions, and body language.

A Stanford-Northwestern-INSEAD study found that people who were coached to mimic their negotiation partner’s behavior not only negotiated a better deal, but expanded the pie for both people.

“Negotiators who mimicked the mannerisms of their opponents both secured better individual outcomes, and their dyads as a whole also performed better when mimicking occurred compared to when it did not,” the authors wrote.

Listen more than you speak.

“When people are uncomfortable, and many people are when they have to negotiate, they start rambling as a way to fill the vacuum of silence,” Trump writes.

“Some of the strongest negotiators I know just sit back and listen. The less they engage, the more likely the other person is to slip up and offer information they otherwise would have kept guarded,” she says.

Always counteroffer, but don’t do it more than once.

Once you receive their offer, you are expected to make a counteroffer. No employer wants a pushover. However, Koller says that you should not go back to the negotiation table more than once because then “it becomes annoying to the hiring manager.”

“Once it gets really drawn out, it gets frustrating for both sides,” and you don’t want to start a new job off on the wrong foot, he says.

Consider your alternatives.

If the employer can’t meet your requested salary, be prepared to negotiate for benefits, like additional vacation days or the ability to telecommute one day per week, Whitmore suggests.

“Salary isn’t everything, and I think you should be open minded,” she says.

“If you don’t get the amount you want, reply with, ‘May I have a job performance review in six or nine months?’ This will give you a window of time to prove yourself and then re-negotiate for a salary increase,” Whitmore suggests.

Practice patience.

Give yourself time to think about their offer, Whitmore says. “Try not to give a definite answer right away. Ask the employer, ‘May I get back to you at the end of the week?'” Separation creates anticipation. This extra time will allow you to review your options with your family or other potential employers, she explains.

Keep a positive attitude.

“If you don’t get the salary you think you deserve, don’t share the news with everyone you know,” says Whitmore. “News travels fast and your comments might come back to haunt you.” And never bad-mouth an employer on social networks, she adds.

“Don’t take it personally. The timing may not be right or the economy may be partly to blame. Consider this: The hiring manager may even call you again in the future if a position in your price range opens up.”

Vivian Giang contributed to a previous version of this article.

 

Businessinsider.com | February 25, 2016 | Jacquelyn Smith and Rachel Gillett

 

 

#Leadership : 9 Things That Make Good Employees Quit…Managers Tend to Blame their Turnover Problems on Everything Under the Sun, while Ignoring the Crux of the Matter: People Don’t Leave Jobs; they Leave Managers.

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It’s pretty incredible how often you hear managers complaining about their best employees leaving, and they really do have something to complain about—few things are as costly and disruptive as good people walking out the door.

Free- Man at Desktop

Managers tend to blame their turnover problems on everything under the sun, while ignoring the crux of the matter:

People don’t Leave Jobs; they Leave Managers.

The sad thing is that this can easily be avoided. All that’s required is a new perspective and some extra effort on the manager’s part.

First, we need to understand the nine worst things that managers do that send good people packing.

1. They Overwork People

Nothing burns good employees out quite like overworking them. It’s so tempting to work your best people hard that managers frequently fall into this trap. Overworking good employees is perplexing; it makes them feel as if they’re being punished for great performance. Overworking employees is also counterproductive. New research from Stanford shows that productivity per hour declines sharply when the workweek exceeds 50 hours, and productivity drops off so much after 55 hours that you don’t get anything out of working more.

If you must increase how much work your talented employees are doing, you’d better increase their status as well. Talented employees will take on a bigger workload, but they won’t stay if their job suffocates them in the process. Raises, promotions, and title-changes are all acceptable ways to increase workload. If you simply increase workload because people are talented, without changing a thing, they will seek another job that gives them what they deserve.

 

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2. They Don’t Recognize Contributions and Reward Good Work

It’s easy to underestimate the power of a pat on the back, especially with top performers who are intrinsically motivated. Everyone likes kudos, none more so than those who work hard and give their all. Managers need to communicate with their people to find out what makes them feel good (for some, it’s a raise; for others, it’s public recognition) and then to reward them for a job well done. With top performers, this will happen often if you’re doing it right.

If you want your best people to stay, you need to think carefully about how you treat them. While good employees are as tough as nails, their talent gives them an abundance of options. You need to make them want to work for you.

3. They Don’t Care about Their Employees

More than half of people who leave their jobs do so because of their relationship with their boss. Smart companies make certain their managers know how to balance being professional with being human. These are the bosses who celebrate an employee’s success, empathize with those going through hard times, and challenge people, even when it hurts. Bosses who fail to really care will always have high turnover rates. It’s impossible to work for someone eight-plus hours a day when they aren’t personally involved and don’t care about anything other than your production yield.

4. They Don’t Honor Their Commitments

Making promises to people places you on the fine line that lies between making them very happy and watching them walk out the door. When you uphold a commitment, you grow in the eyes of your employees because you prove yourself to be trustworthy and honorable (two very important qualities in a boss). But when you disregard your commitment, you come across as slimy, uncaring, and disrespectful. After all, if the boss doesn’t honor his or her commitments, why should everyone else?

5. They Hire and Promote the Wrong People

Good, hard-working employees want to work with like-minded professionals. When managers don’t do the hard work of hiring good people, it’s a major demotivator for those stuck working alongside them. Promoting the wrong people is even worse. When you work your tail off only to get passed over for a promotion that’s given to someone who glad-handed their way to the top, it’s a massive insult. No wonder it makes good people leave.

6. They Don’t Let People Pursue Their Passions

Talented employees are passionate. Providing opportunities for them to pursue their passions improves their productivity and job satisfaction. But many managers want people to work within a little box. These managers fear that productivity will decline if they let people expand their focus and pursue their passions. This fear is unfounded. Studies show that people who are able to pursue their passions at work experience flow, a euphoric state of mind that is five times more productive than the norm.

7. They Fail to Develop People’s Skills

When managers are asked about their inattention to employees, they try to excuse themselves, using words such as “trust,” “autonomy,” and “empowerment.” This is complete nonsense. Good managers manage, no matter how talented the employee. They pay attention and are constantly listening and giving feedback.

Management may have a beginning, but it certainly has no end. When you have a talented employee, it’s up to you to keep finding areas in which they can improve to expand their skill set. The most talented employees want feedback—more so than the less talented ones—and it’s your job to keep it coming. If you don’t, your best people will grow bored and complacent.

8. They Fail to Engage Their Creativity

The most talented employees seek to improve everything they touch. If you take away their ability to change and improve things because you’re only comfortable with the status quo, this makes them hate their jobs. Caging up this innate desire to create not only limits them, it limits you.

9. They Fail to Challenge People Intellectually

Great bosses challenge their employees to accomplish things that seem inconceivable at first. Instead of setting mundane, incremental goals, they set lofty goals that push people out of their comfort zones. Then, good managers do everything in their power to help them succeed. When talented and intelligent people find themselves doing things that are too easy or boring, they seek other jobs that will challenge their intellects.

Bringing It All Together

If you want your best people to stay, you need to think carefully about how you treat them. While good employees are as tough as nails, their talent gives them an abundance of options. You need to make them want to work for you.

What other mistakes cause great employees to leave? Please share your thoughts in the comments section below as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.

 

Forbes.com | February 23, 2016 | Travis Bradberry 

 

Your #Career : The Woman’s Guide To Getting Back On Her Own Two Feet….Women are Often the Default Caregivers in many Families.  This often Results in the Decision to Leave the Workplace which Can have Detrimental Effects on their Career When Returning to the Workplace.

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Sadly, the longer a woman off-ramps, the harder it is to get back into her field of choice. When deciding to start a family, these are the issues that should be discussed ahead of time via proper planning to ensure a smooth on-ramp back into the workplace.

Free- Women Looking over Snow Area

On the upside, we do live longer, but those of us who stay at home with children to raise them ourselves also have the burden of sacrifice our highest earning potential during our child-bearing years.

One of the best parts about running a blog that discusses women and money is the interactions I have with women behind the scenes.  Readers, needing answers to pressing money issues.  And, while I am not a financial advisor, and articles written here or across other social networks and partner sites should never be construed as such, I am often able to give insight into issues that come up during our email exchanges.

A question often asked is:

“How can I make my own money without sacrificing time with my family?   I want to stand on my own 2 feet”

Why This Is Important

This is an important issue for women as we should be able to stand on our own so that we’re prepared for whatever life brings our way.   We’re not five year olds needing to ask daddy for $5 to buy ice-cream.  Yes, this is a touchy subject, depending on who you’re talking to but an important topic nonetheless.   Too many women find themselves without options once their partners are no longer in the equation, whatever the reason.

Understanding the minutia of money management is of utmost importance as we often think that if we make the money, the money management skills will just show up.  Not at all.  In fact, the opposite is true.  We must master our money mindset before we make the moolah!  Teaching yourself these principles will give you the foundations needed to be successful.

Now let’s talk about you, the budding money making machine!

Barriers To Financial Independence?

Looking at this closely will help you figure out why things are the way they are.

The replies I often get are:

“My husband manages all of it”

“I don’t know how to…I haven’t had a job in years..”

“I’ve been taking care of our kids so money was the last thing on my mind”

One of the best pieces of money advice my mom gave me years ago is that:

“Women often work hard at teaching their children the art of being independent while abdicating that responsibility to themselves”

We simply must stop giving up power in our relationships this way.

I think it’s great that we want to be there for our kids when they’re growing up but we often forget about who we will be once they are independent and don’t need us anymore.  It is often after the kids are in school or the unfortunate event of a separation or divorce that some women think about returning to work and how they will support themselves.  But it can be done with some forethought and careful planning.

Amber Wright of TalktoAmber.com discussed how she managed the transition back after the birth of her children:

To manage my transition back to work after having both of my daughters, I gave myself time to prepare mentally and physically. At least two weeks before my return, I started using my alarm clock again to help wake me up earlier. We also did test runs with the sitter so our family could adjust and not go into shock overnight. Involving my husband in the process made a difference, as well. My heart still ached terribly, thinking about how much I’d miss my babies, but the early start helped make it a little easier! 

 

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MB from Washington, DC had a particularly difficult time deliberating her return due to her son’s illness:

… returning to work after Dominic was born was particularly hard. I know that that is something that all mothers struggle with but Dominic had spent quite some time in the hospital. He was born 7 weeks early and became very sick. Three months of his life we spent in the NICU Hopkins. Which meant three months of his life he was cared for by someone else. In thinking about returning to work there was a tremendous amount of guilt. Not just the guilt that comes from attempting to balance being a mother and being career woman but also something deeper.
Something that stemmed from the fact that, while I know I could not care for him when he was sick that it was still my job as his mother. So I’m on maternity leave was finally up and it came time for me to return to work I seriously considered becoming a stay at home mom. This turned out to not the feasible for my family because we could not afford it. But beyond that being financially feasible, I realize that my career as a part of who I am. I worked long and I worked hard to get where I am and my career. I dedicated the majority of my life to my education into decisions that would create opportunities for me and for my family. Some of those opportunities stem from the places that my career has taken me. The truth is, I like having a powerful job. I like having influence and I like being able to provide for myself and for my family. I like that I have a career not a job but a career. So it came time to consider what was best from my son I realized that I had to do what was best for me. I had to wait the opportunities that are created by having “enough.” So many families struggle with “not enough”. I didn’t want mine to be one of them. 
… but I digress. I realized that I had to push down the guilt and consider that perhaps being a mom isn’t just about being present. That it isn’t just about being able to cook every meal and kiss every boo boo. I realized that it had to be about, at least for me, showing my son that there is a balance. That mom will always love him and will always be there to kiss every boo boo if he needs it.
But also but there are other sides to me and to all people. Being Dominic’s mother is the greatest blessing and privilege I have ever been given. It is more important than anything I will ever do. Is more profound than a job I will ever have. He is the most important thing in my life. But it is okay for him not to be the only thing. I realize that being a mother is not the sum total of me and that’s okay. Part of being a mom is providing an example. He should know that people work for opportunity. He should know that women can be accomplished and educated and powerful and can provide.
My son will know these things because I will show him. I have ambitions and dreams and goals that I will work to attain as his mother not in spite of being his mother. People think you have to choose. People think you have to pick a side – motherhood or career. I disagree. I think maybe part of being a good mother is being well rounded. It’s finding a way to be happy. If you’re happy involves success in your career can you find the way to balance it. You make a way to be both a great mother and advance your career in that order.

As you can see, this can be a difficult balance because many women struggle with the decision of having to decide between work and childcare.

However, if you’re planning to stay at home with the kids once you have them, create a plan that enables you to keep your resume fresh and skills updated while you do so.  One never knows what the future holds which may lead to you to re-enter the workforce hoping that someone will hire you once again.

Communication

Talk to your partner about managing your money together if you don’t already have that arrangement in your relationship. At the very least, you should have a role in the management of the money in your relationship.

Maintain access to all accounts.  You’d be surprised how many women don’t have access to the money they make.   Know where your accounts are stored, check your credit report as well as your partner’s and review the status of all accounts listed on the credit report to keep yourself abreast of everything going on financially.

Women are often the default caregivers in many families.  This often results in the decision to leave the workplace which can have detrimental effects on their career when returning to the workplace.

Sadly, the longer a woman off-ramps, the harder it is to get back into her field of choice. When deciding to start a family, these are the issues that should be discussed ahead of time via proper planning to ensure a smooth on-ramp back into the workplace.

On the upside, we do live longer, but those of us who stay at home with children to raise them ourselves also have the burden of sacrificing our highest earning potential during our child-bearing years.

One of the best parts about running a blog that discusses women and money is the interactions I have with women behind the scenes.  Readers, needing answers to pressing money issues.  And, while I am not a financial advisor, and articles written here or across other social networks and partner sites should never be construed as such, I am often able to give insight into issues that come up during our email exchanges.

A question often asked is:

“How can I make my own money without sacrificing time with my family?   I want to stand on my own 2 feet”

Why This Is Important

This is an important issue for women as we should be able to stand on our own so that we’re prepared for whatever life brings our way.   We’re not five year olds needing to ask daddy for $5 to buy ice-cream.  Yes, this is a touchy subject, depending on whom you’re talking to but an important topic nonetheless.   Too many women find themselves without options once their partners are no longer in the equation, whatever the reason.

The Road Back To Independence

The money struggle for women is real.  Whether you’re married, single or newly divorced and want to learn how to manage money properly, it’s best to start here:  21 Days To Rock Your Finances: Day 1- Create A 1 Year Financial Plan.

Understanding the minutia of money management is of utmost importance as we often think that if we make the money, the money management skills will just show up.  Not at all.  In fact, the opposite is true.  We must master our money mindset before we make the moolah!  Teaching yourself these principles will give you the foundations needed to be successful.

Now let’s talk about you, the budding money making machine!

Barriers To Financial Independence?

Looking at this closely will help you figure out why things are the way they are.

The replies I often get are:

“My husband manages all of it”

“I don’t know how to…I haven’t had a job in years..”

“I’ve been taking care of our kids so money was the last thing on my mind”

One of the best pieces of money advice my mom gave me years ago is that:

“Women often work hard at teaching their children the art of being independent while abdicating that responsibility to themselves”

We simply must stop giving up power in our relationships this way.

I think it’s great that we want to be there for our kids when they’re growing up but we often forget about who we will be once they are independent and don’t need us anymore.  It is often after the kids are in school or the unfortunate event of a separation or divorce that some women think about returning to work and how they will support themselves.  But it can be done with some forethought and careful planning.

Amber Wright of TalktoAmber.com discussed how she managed the transition back after the birth of her children:

To manage my transition back to work after having both of my daughters, I gave myself time to prepare mentally and physically. At least two weeks before my return, I started using my alarm clock again to help wake me up earlier. We also did test runs with the sitter so our family could adjust and not go into shock overnight. Involving my husband in the process made a difference, as well. My heart still ached terribly, thinking about how much I’d miss my babies, but the early start helped make it a little easier! 

MB from Washington, DC had a particularly difficult time deliberating her return due to her son’s illness:

… returning to work after Dominic was born was particularly hard. I know that that is something that all mothers struggle with but Dominic had spent quite some time in the hospital. He was born 7 weeks early and became very sick. Three months of his life we spent in the NICU Hopkins. Which meant three months of his life he was cared for by someone else. In thinking about returning to work there was a tremendous amount of guilt. Not just the guilt that comes from attempting to balance being a mother and being career woman but also something deeper.
Something that stemmed from the fact that, while I know I could not care for him when he was sick that it was still my job as his mother. So I’m on maternity leave was finally up and it came time for me to return to work I seriously considered becoming a stay at home mom. This turned out to not the feasible for my family because we could not afford it. But beyond that being financially feasible, I realize that my career as a part of who I am. I worked long and I worked hard to get where I am and my career. I dedicated the majority of my life to my education into decisions that would create opportunities for me and for my family. Some of those opportunities stem from the places that my career has taken me. The truth is, I like having a powerful job. I like having influence and I like being able to provide for myself and for my family. I like that I have a career not a job but a career. So it came time to consider what was best from my son I realized that I had to do what was best for me. I had to wait the opportunities that are created by having “enough.” So many families struggle with “not enough”. I didn’t want mine to be one of them. 
… but I digress. I realized that I had to push down the guilt and consider that perhaps being a mom isn’t just about being present. That it isn’t just about being able to cook every meal and kiss every boo boo. I realized that it had to be about, at least for me, showing my son that there is a balance. That mom will always love him and will always be there to kiss every boo boo if he needs it. But also but there are other sides to me and to all people. Being Dominic’s mother is the greatest blessing and privilege I have ever been given. It is more important than anything I will ever do. Is more profound than a job I will ever have. He is the most important thing in my life. But it is okay for him not to be the only thing. I realize that being a mother is not the sum total of me and that’s okay.
Part of being a mom is providing an example. He should know that people work for opportunity. He should know that women can be accomplished and educated and powerful and can provide. My son will know these things because I will show him. I have ambitions and dreams and goals that I will work to attain as his mother not in spite of being his mother. People think you have to choose. People think you have to pick a side – motherhood or career. I disagree. I think maybe part of being a good mother is being well rounded. It’s finding a way to be happy. If you’re happy involves success in your career can you find the way to balance it. You make a way to be both a great mother and advance your career in that order.

As you can see, this can be a difficult balance because many women struggle with the decision of having to decide between work and childcare.

However, if you’re planning to stay at home with the kids once you have them, create a plan that enables you to keep your resume fresh and skills updated while you do so.  One never knows what the future holds which may lead to you to re-enter the workforce hoping that someone will hire you once again.

Communication

Talk to your partner about managing your money together if you don’t already have that arrangement in your relationship. At the very least, you should have a role in the management of the money in your relationship.

Maintain access to all accounts.  You’d be surprised how many women don’t have access to the money they make.   Know where your accounts are stored, check your credit report as well as your partner’s and review the status of all accounts listed on the credit report to keep yourself abreast of everything going on financially.

How Do I Get Back And Stand On My Two Feet?

Go back to school.  Start there.  Did you finish college?  Do you want to go back to graduate school?  What are you passionate about that requires a degree or certificate?  Do you need to go back to school?  These are all questions that you must ask yourself if your path to returning to the work force involves going back to school.

Start A Business.  Along the same lines of going back to school, what are you passionate about?  Do you see a need in the market that hasn’t been filled?  What problem can you solve? How can you work to fill that need while creating income for yourself?  This can include producing your own stuff to sell on Etsy or Ebay to heading a startup company which solves a problem.

Update Your Skills.  If you’re in a field like myself, then you’ll need to make sure that applicable licenses or certifications are always up to date as allowing them to lapse costs more time and money.  Talk to the licensing or certification board within your field and find out what you need to do in order to maintain your skills in this area.  If you plan on applying to jobs that require a license or certification then you’ll need to make sure this is up to date.

Attend workshops and conferences in an effort to remain up to date with the current trends in your field as well.  This also gives you the opportunity to network with others which we will discuss in a bit.

Volunteer or Intern Within Your Field

This continues to be my most successful piece of advice.  It has worked for me and countless others who needed a foot in the door.  Yes, this does mean sacrificing time and money but when you’re in the position of needing to prove yourself, then beggars can’t be choosers.

One of our administrative assistants did this prior to obtaining a paid position with us and it worked out nicely for her.  When the executive assistant that she supported quit, she was able to move into her position with relative ease while collecting a new full time paycheck.

Network, Network, Network!  Did I Say Network?

I lied.  This too is a great way to land a position.  Network with others in your field.  Go to chapter meetings, join associations and go to the hosted happy hours.  Talk to others about your goals and learn to sell yourself.

Be willing to sacrifice and prove to them that you’re the woman for the job.  Talking to the right person means they can possibly put in a good word for you during the hiring process.

Find A Mentor i.e. Your Sisterhood of Success AKA “Personal Board Of Advisors”

Who supports you professionally when it’s time to make hard professional decisions?  Do you have a group of women or even one woman that you can turn to?  I take that back, it doesn’t have to be a woman.  Anyone who supports you and is able to provide professional guidance will do.  Women are more successful when they have mentors guiding them both personally and professionally.   Especially when women mentor women.  Great things happen!

This starts with choosing your Personal Board of Advisors.  Some of you might refer to this as “Big Sister in my Head”.  Personally, I have always imagined Oprah and Michelle Obama as big sisters in my head, so you get my drift!

How do you choose your Personal Board of Advisors?  Kathy Korman Freygives us some tips on getting started:

Visualize yourself in a room with all of the people who represent each place setting.  Who do you want in that spot supporting you throughout the years?

Once you’ve picked who you want in your Sisterhood of Success, chart a plan to connect with them.  This can be someone who is readily accessible or someone you’ve admired from a far.  In the latter case, do your home work and make the process easier for them. 

Remember, flattery will get you what you need.  Let them know how much their work means to you and that will open the door to discussions around lending their time to help make you a success.

Once you have a plan stick to it!  Remember, consistency is key, once you’ve established the relationship with this person, keep the lines of communication open and be flexible.

What are your thoughts on women seeking advice on how to get back on their feet, financially?  What tips do you have?  Stories to share?  Any encouragement or advice is much appreciated!

 

Forbes.com | February 22, 2016 | Ginger Dean

 

Your #Career : 17 Tricks for Landing a Job that Isn’t Advertised … or Doesn’t Exist….There’s a “Hidden Job Market” with Tons of Unadvertised Jobs. And as it Turns Out, There are some Easy Ways to Crack It.

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“This is good news for job seekers who are a little adventurous but also strategic,” explains Lynn Taylor, a national workplace expert and author of “Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant: How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job.” “A hidden market affords you endless opportunities to pursue your dream job. Whether a job is unadvertised or hasn’t even been created yet, by being proactive and pursuing the companies you want to join, you’ll increase the odds of finding what you want. And if the stars line up, you may even have limited or no competition.”

Free- Lock on Fence

“With any job search, networking is critical, but especially if you pursue this alternative tactic,” Taylor adds. “If you know any insiders who either work or have worked at the companies you’re interested in, that’s great news. Or, you may know an industry contact who can refer you to such a person. But remember that if you’re casting a wide net and are still employed, you must use a lot of discretion.”

Your “hidden job search” will require a lot more research, tenacity, and emotional intelligence than a traditional one, she says, “because you typically have to do more persuading and take the time to package yourself extremely well when you’re trying to land an unadvertised, or non-existent job.” But the effort can be well worth it, she adds.

If you’re up for the challenge, here are 17 tricks for landing an elusive, hidden job:

1- Work on mastering your soft skills.

Taylor says you’ll need: good communication abilities, strong drive, excellent street smarts and instincts, great networking skills, diplomacy, intellectual curiosity, persuasiveness, an ability to articulate your pitch, passion, and creativity.

Aside from having a competitive, marketable skill set, these are some soft skills that can make a huge difference when trying to tap the hidden job market.

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2- Find your ‘unique selling proposition’ and master your elevator pitch.

You can’t be all things to all people, so zone in on your brand and “unique selling proposition.”

“Who are you in your industry sphere? What have you accomplished that makes you unique? Where are these skills most needed?” Taylor asks. “Make your elevator pitch powerful and succinct. Once you have your packaging complete, this kind of targeted search will be much more efficient.”

 

“When pursuing hidden jobs, this is more true than ever,” she explains. “Your question should initially be about whether they can help steer you in the right direction. Informational interviews are a foot in the door, too. They may be arranged because the hiring manager views them as a safe approach to keep your expectations low.”

3- Do your homework.

If and when you decide to pursue this type of job search, the onus is on you to conduct extensive research. “You have a little more latitude when there’s a published opening, but this requires a deeper understanding of the industry, company, their mission, department, specific contact names and duties, as well as knowledge of how you can contribute in a meaningful way,” Taylor explains.

Use keywords and the company name not only on LinkedIn, but through a general search, she suggests. “This way, you’ll find endless information on companies, people, strategies, news, and more.”

Roll up your sleeves and become a job sleuth. “Read news releases. Look for people with common interests and think out of the proverbial box. If one of your prospective hiringmanagers plays on a local golf team or is involved with your favorite charity, for instance, forge ahead and leverage commonalities. If they had an anniversary or major achievement in the press, mention that in your pitch,” she says.

 

“Since job networking has virtually become synonymous with LinkedIn, and networking is a huge part of your strategy, take advantage of this critical tool,” she says.

4- Network non-stop.

Spread the word about your job search on social media, talk to colleagues, reconnect with former colleagues, attend industry meetings and conferences, and talk with relatives and friends to get the word out. “Just be sure to thank your contacts along the way and offer to helpthem if they need anything,” she says. “Pay it forward.”

If you tell enough people about what you’re looking for and the value you can bring to a company, someone may say, “Oh, I think a job like that might be opening up at my company soon,” or a startup founder may hear about you and say, “We could probably use someone like that on our team.”

“With any job search, networking is critical, but especially if you pursue this alternative tactic,” Taylor adds. “If you know any insiders who either work or have worked at the companies you’re interested in, that’s great news. Or, you may know an industry contact who can refer you to such a person. But remember that if you’re casting a wide net and are still employed, you must use a lot of discretion.”

 

5- Stay on top of industry and company news.

Your homework is never done.

Set up alerts and stay on top of company and industry news. “It will help open doors and elevate your personal brand with prospective hiring managers,” she explains. “Google alerts is a must-have, but so are those from job-related apps. Openings for similar jobs at companies can give you a sign that your timing is good. Just be sure not to become overwhelmed with every app on the planet, especially if you’re easily distracted. Be focused and selective.”

6- Watch for companies in ‘hiring mode.’

When you read stories of companies hiring in your field, that’s a clue you have an above-average shot at either filling an unadvertised position, or potentially having one created for you, Taylor says.

 

7- Zero in on your dream job or company.

Finding a hidden job is more laborious, but your approach here is quality, not quantity. “So before you launch your campaign, have a clear idea of the position and companies that most appeal to you,” Taylor suggests. “Then scour their websites to familiarize yourself with their goals and people.”

8- Become a LinkedIn Guru.

“Since job networking has virtually become synonymous with LinkedIn, and networking is a huge part of your strategy, take advantage of this critical tool,” she says.

Learn the ins and outs of it; add meaningful connections; explore the benefits of LinkedIn Premium; post helpful articles to your page and groups; engage with members who might help you; look at your connections and their connections; offer to help others; write to employers; and regularly look at job postings on the site.

 

9- Ask for guidance, not jobs.

People are much more receptive when they’re not put on the spot.

“When pursuing hidden jobs, this is more true than ever,” she explains. “Your question should initially be about whether they can help steer you in the right direction. Informational interviews are a foot in the door, too. They may be arranged because the hiring manager views them as a safe approach to keep your expectations low.”

 

10- Volunteer and join committees.

Not only does volunteering with a charity help you give back, it can also establish trust, strong professional bonds, and friendships, she says. “If there’s an industry association that accepts volunteers and you can join a committee, you will interface with people who instantly have common interests. Job seekers who give back to their community have an edge in hiring, too, all things being equal.”

 

11- Call and email.

Did you need to read that twice? “In this day and age, calling a perfect stranger at a company with anything having to do with a job seems risky,” says Taylor. “However, that could be the very reason that you stand out. Some added ammunition: You know someone in common, you’re highly diplomatic, you have a competitive skill that’s in demand, and you understand their mission and corporate culture.”

Your email can acknowledge that they have no openings, but your background can be described as mutually advantageous for specific reasons. “This is where your deep knowledge of the firm can reap major rewards.”

12- Go as high as you can.

Depending on how senior you are and the size of the company, don’t be afraid to reach out and reach high in the organization.

“If you’re a mid-level IT manager, it may make perfect sense to target the CIO or CTO, especially if you have a very marketable skill. If you start too low, you may have to deal with the ‘fear factor’: No one wants to help a job candidate who could threaten their job security,” she says. “Accessing the email can be tricky, but there are ways to figure it out, and beginning with the appropriate admin can at least get you in the door.”

 

13- Consider project work or a temp job.

One way to land a job when there’s no advertised opening is to offer your services as a project worker, consultant, or high-level temporary worker. “If a full-time position is in the offing, you’re already well situated,” Taylor says.

14- Be kind to the gatekeeper.

“Most of the corporate positions I accepted were never advertised,” Taylor says. “I targeted companies with whom I wanted to work. I also believe that administrative assistants are the unsung heroes of today’s companies. They’re often the trusted confidantes of C-suite executives.”

Many job seekers make the mistake of overlooking this vast resource and try to circumvent them in emails or calls. But consider their knowledge and influence, she advises. “Executives who are told by their admins that a great candidate contacted them are much more likely to show interest than if the job seeker is evasive. This is where your people skills can shine, as you show respect for the very people who can be invaluable allies.”

 

15- Have a thick skin and remain positive.

No matter how diplomatic you are, you’ll run across people who will turn you down. “It’s fine. You’re not here to please everyone and you just became one person closer to landing a great, unexpected interview,” she says. “Negativity can drag anyone down, but if you remain tenacious, you will get traction.”

 

16- Be patient.

If you need a new job fast, this isn’t necessarily the way to go about it. But if you have the luxury of time, it’s an excellent approach.

However, you need to be patient. You’re trying to find jobs that are not advertised or may not even exist yet, so the process may be challenging and can take a while. Don’t give up too easily.

17- Assume an entrepreneurial mindset.

Tell yourself, “They need me more than I need them” until you believe it.

“View yourself as a catalyst for the company’s growth,” says Taylor. “Put yourself in the shoes of the manager and market yourself accordingly.” How will they advance their mission with you on board? What unique abilities do you bring to the table? Consider that you’re offering something they need versus asking for a favor.

“When conducting your job search, it’s wise to pursue the obvious: publicly posted openings,” she says. “But when you expand your options to the ‘unseen,’ the possibilities are only limited by you.”

 

 

Businessinsider.com | February 19, 2016  |  

Your #Career : 5 Hiring Trends To Watch In 2016… #3- Social media will be Increasingly Used to find Candidates. (i.e. your LinkedIn Profile)

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As 2016 gets into full swing, we’re beginning to see several key hiring trends develop. Based on my insights as a former recruiter, I believe these themes bode well for job seekers looking to make the most of their career this year by finding a new job.

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Here are five trends job seekers can leverage in finding their next great role:

1. Job offers will include more perks and benefits. According to Mercer, salary increases this year are projected to be 2.9%. So, if you’re planning on remaining in your current job, chances are your raise will not be significant (if you receive one at all).

As such, job seekers looking to increase their earning power by pursuing external opportunities should also focus on negotiating more bells and whistles in their offer. In light of the current talent shortage, employers are generally hungry for quality candidates. Seekers should leverage this not only in negotiating financial benefits like base compensation, a sign-on bonus and relocation allowance – which may be more difficult to attain in the current economic climate – but also for perks like flexible work schedules and additional time off. Candidates can expect to see offers that include ramped up benefits like unlimited personal time and extended maternity and personal leaves.

 

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2. Increased interest in boomerangs. The trend of employees considering returning to their former employers is on the rise. In a recent Monster poll, more than half of participants revealed that they’d consider returning to a former employer.

To that point, an additional 28% reported that they are already boomerangs. As more recruiters (and therefore employers) tap into this potential gold mine of rehires, they’re discovering the benefits of a former employee: boomerangs already know the company culture and infrastructure, which can help reduce their time to hire as well as their ramp up period.

We can expect to see more companies hosting in-person and virtual alumni events to network and re-establish rapport with their former employees, and, most importantly, build a pipeline of valuable potential rehires.

3. Social media will be increasingly used to find candidates. Back in the day, employers could only rely on resumes and cover letters to get a sense of a candidate’s qualifications. As we all know, the Internet and social media have made it much easier for them to find and research potential candidates – especially elusive talent that may not be actively looking for a job.

While resumes and cover letters are still staples of the process, expect recruiters to check out your online profiles in addition to what you have submitted – or even before you submit anything at all.

The really good news? Whether you’re looking for a job, applying or simply networking, having an active, polished online presence can make it easier for recruiters to find you and reach out about opportunities you may not have even known existed. Be reachable and, more importantly, be responsive to their emails, even if you’re not interested at the time.

4. More lucrative employee referral programs – and beyond. When I worked in corporate recruiting, all of my hiring managers shared one common hiring metric: the number one source of new hires was employee referrals.

In 2016, it’s likely employers will ramp up their referral programs for employees, as well as start extending referral bonuses externally, such as offering $100 to $500 to friends of the company and former employees. As the war for talent heats up, keep your eyes open for opportunities to refer friends and colleagues.

5. More offers will include flexibility. Until recently, it was common for candidates to be nervous about asking potential employers for flexible work arrangements.

Now more and more employers are offering flexibility as part of their employment package up front. And the options will continue to expand this year – from occasional telecommuting to staggering work hours and more. As the workplace continues to evolve, hiring practices will change along with them.

Vicki Salemi is a career expert for Monster, author, public speaker and columnist.

 

Forbes.com | February 18, 2016 | Vicki Salemi

#Strategy : Stressed Out At Work? How to Train Your Brain to Fix It…According to the World Health Organization, Stress costs Businesses in the United States around $300 Billion per Year, in Terms of Absenteeism, Employee Turnover, & in Losses of Productivity.

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“Most of us are training ourselves to be incredibly good worriers, or not being able to sleep, or not being able to have good relationships,” Burton explained. Practicing mindfulness is a way to combat that, without any “woo-woo” nonsense, as Burton calls it. Mindfulness isn’t oddball chants tied to the mystical or spiritual. “It’s brain training, pure and simple,” he said. 

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Around the age of 40, executive Joe Burton was experiencing what he calls “unhappiness at full speed.” He lost two siblings at young ages, wrenched his back, and suffered from insomnia. He served as a COO at several multibillion dollar companies and was finding great success in his career, but he was burning out – quickly.Stress was killing him, if not literally, then certainly in terms of his mental well-being and productivity.

According to the World Health Organization, stress costs businesses in the United States around $300 billion per year, in terms of absenteeism, employee turnover, and in losses of productivity. According to the University of Massachusetts Lowell, health care expenditures are 50% higher for employees who report high levels of stress, and absenteeism can cost large U.S. companies around $3.6 million each year. Another analysis shows high levels of stress contributes to at least 120,000 deaths in the U.S. each year and health care costs of $125 to $190 billion.

 

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To ease that burden on himself and on others, Burton decided to take a step back from the traditional executive sphere and instead focus on technology that could help people in similar situations. For Burton, that meant focusing on mindfulness. “There are literally thousands of studies correlating mindfulness training across a wide array of health and performance benefits,” Burton said in an interview with The Cheat Sheet.

According to Burton, the average person spends about 47% of their time with their mind wandering, thinking about the past, worrying about the future, or focusing on regrets or anxieties. The brain follows established patterns, meaning over time it grows more ingrained to accept those distractions. 

“Most of us are training ourselves to be incredibly good worriers, or not being able to sleep, or not being able to have good relationships,” Burton explained. Practicing mindfulness is a way to combat that, without any “woo-woo” nonsense, as Burton calls it. Mindfulness isn’t oddball chants tied to the mystical or spiritual. “It’s brain training, pure and simple,” he said.

With mindfulness training, Burton eased his back pain and restored his ability to get a good night’s sleep. Mindfulness is also tied to relieving symptoms of PTSD, addictions, and can even have biometric effects likelowering blood pressure. With that in mind, Burton founded Whil (pronounced “will”), a company that provides mindfulness exercises for employees and individuals who are looking to relieve the stress in their lives. It’s geared toward driven professionals who “know they’re not going to slow down but also need help,” Burton explained.

Whil has three main branches. Now is geared toward adults, both in professional and personal capacities, and leads people through mindfulness and yoga exercises with videos created by trained experts. Grow is a similar platform, but is designed for teenagers. Burton said to his knowledge, Whil’s program is the first of its kind for teens.

“Happiness begins at home, but so does stress,” he said. The goal of Grow is to equip teenagers to handle stress appropriately, before ingraining stress patterns into their lives. A third branch, Search Inside Yourself, isbased on the book written by former Google engineer Chade-Meng Tan. Those sessions, also all online, provide employees with emotional intelligence lessons and ways to improve leadership and teamwork through the lens of mindfulness. 

“The beauty of our program is everything was mapped against the leading causes of diseases and was made for the individual,” Burton said. An employee can log into their company-sponsored account when they’re having a particularly difficult time focusing, or can log on if they’re experiencing the death of a loved one.

“The thing I’m excited about is the teachers that we’re working with are really world class – the content we’ve created is just amazing,” Burton said. Once you sign up, you can search for meditations or yoga sessions based on how you’re feeling, what you’d like to accomplish (become more aware, connect with others, experience gratitude, etc.), and how long you have. Some sessions are just one minute, others are about 10 minutes or so. Mindfulness and yoga both have introductory lessons, followed by a library of hundreds of videos based around certain goals. 

The “ground swell” of interest around the topic of mindfulness has really made a difference in the last few years, Burton said, but individuals and companies will have a number of reasons for trying it. Individuals might want to become more productive or alleviate stressors, while companies may want to lower their health care burdens by meeting the needs of their employees. “Different people are interested in creating new habits for different reasons,” Burton said. Whil is optimized to work on a desktop or a mobile device using headphones. “For us, we think mobile devices are the best stress-delivering mechanism ever invented,” Burton said. In this case, the devices that often cause the most distractions can also be the vehicle for stress relief. 

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CheatSheet.com | February 19, 2016 | Nikelle Murphy

 

#Strategy : 13 Science-Backed Tactics for Winning any Negotiation…Whether it’s your Salary or your Cable Bill, a Lot of Life is Up for Negotiation. 

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Fortunately for you, there are plenty of psychological tricks that can help you get what you want — especially when you start out as the person with less power.

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Here, we rounded up some of the most practical and creative science-backed negotiating strategies.

Know your context.

Is the negotiation one-shot or long-term?

In “The Mind and the Heart of the Negotiator,” Kellogg management professor Leigh Thompson notes that the interaction between a customer and the waitstaff at a highway roadside diner is one of the few one-shot negotiations that happen in life — there’s little chance that patron or staff will see each other again.

But every other negotiation is long-term, with employment negotiations as a primary example. If it’s long-term, you need to manage not only monetary value, but the impression you’re making.

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Make the first offer.

It makes use of the anchoring effect.

If you start high, the hiring manager may adjust the figure down slightly. But that’s typically a stronger position than starting low and trying to negotiate up.

“Whoever makes the first offer essentially drops an anchor on the table,” Thompson tells Business Insider. “I might say that your opening offer is ridiculous, but nevertheless, unconsciously, I’ve been anchored.”

 

Make an aggressive offer.

Columbia University negotiation scholar Adam Galinsky says that people are overly cautious when making first offers.

On HBS Working Knowledge, Galinsky likens negotiating a salary to selling a house:

Take the perspective of the seller: more extreme first offers lead to higher final settlements…

High-anchor offers lead buyers to focus on a negotiated item’s positive attributes. In addition, an aggressive first offer allows you to offer concessions and still reach an agreement that’s much better than your alternatives.

In contrast, a nonaggressive first offer leaves you with two unappealing options: Make small concessions or stand by your demands.

Before you go in, know the lowest amount you’d accept.

Scholars call it the “reservation value,” or the lowest amount you’ll take.

“We always hope to do better than our reservation values,” writes negotiation expert Chad Ellis, “but it’s important to know what yours is, both to avoid accepting a deal you shouldn’t have and as a reference point for how much a current deal is worth to you.”

Having a firm grasp of your reservation value is important from a psychological perspective: If you anchor it into your mind,you’ll be less anchored by the other person’s offer.

 

 

Mirror the other person’s behavior.

When people are getting along, they mimic one another — mirroring each other’s accents, speech patterns, facial expressions, and body language.

A Stanford-Northwestern-INSEAD studyfound that people who were coached to mimic their negotiation partners behavior not only negotiated a better deal, but expanded the pie for both people.

“Negotiators who mimicked the mannerisms of their opponents both secured better individual outcomes, and their dyads as a whole also performed better when mimicking occurred compared to when it did not,” the authors wrote.

Offer a range slightly above what you hope to get.

Research indicates that people respond best when given a “bolstering range offer,” where you state the number that you’re looking for — and a range above it. If you’re trying to get to a $100,000 salary, ask for a salary range of $100,000 to $120,000.

Offering a range strikes people as more reasonable than standing firm on a single number, so you’re less likely to get hit with an extreme counteroffer.

 

Tell them something about yourself.

In a 2002 experiment cited by Wharton professor Adam Grant, Northwestern and Stanford students were asked to negotiate over email.

Some went straight to business, exchanging only names and email addresses.

Others went off-topic, “schmoozing” about hometowns and hobbies.

The schmoozers reached an agreement 59% of the time, while the business-only made it 40% of the time.

Keep all your options on the table.

Grant also notes the work of researcher Neil Rackham, who found that skilled negotiators don’t “sequence” the topics within a negotiation — they keep everything on the table.

So instead of saying, “Let’s resolve the salary first, and then we’ll move on to the other issues,” you resolve the components of the agreement all together — location, vacation time, or signing bonus.

“By keeping all of the issues on the table, you have the flexibility to propose trading location and bonus for a bump in salary,” Grant writes.

 

Use a precise figure rather than a round number.

You’ll probably sound like you know what you’re talking about.

That’s according to recent research, which found that dealmakers who present more precise offers (like $1.01 million) in mergers and acquisitions see more favorable outcomes than those who present round-number offers (like $1 million).

Specifically, those who make precise offers are more likely to win the negotiation, to have their initial offer accepted, and to see higher announcement returns.

Elicit your partner’s sympathy.

When you’re the less powerful party in a negotiation, it can help to make the other person feel slightly bad for you.

That’s according to a recent study co-authored by researchers at the University of California-Berkeley’s Haas School of Business and New York University. During mock negotiations around salary and benefits, some participants were told to reveal they had student loans and an ill parent and others were told it was best to stick to rational arguments.

Results showed that students in the first group, who gained their partner’s sympathy, were more likely to get what they wanted. In fact, both parties walked away with a better deal in these situations.

 

Emphasize what you’re giving the other person.

And don’t focus on what the other person is losing.

A study conducted by researchers at Leuphana University and Saarland University in Germany explored this in a range of negotiations, including buying and selling used appliances.

In one experiment, participants were divided into buyers and sellers and asked to rate their partner’s proposal. In some cases, they received offers (e.g. “The seller offers the refrigerator for a price of €160,” or, “The buyer offers a price of €160 for the refrigerator”). In other cases, they received requests (e.g. “The seller requests a price of €160 for the refrigerator,” or, “The buyer requests the refrigerator for a price of €160″).

Results showed that both buyers and sellers were more likely to concede when the other person focused on what they were going to gain from the negotiation (offers), in contrast to what they were going to lose (requests).

Act in unpredictable ways.

One study found that expressing inconsistent emotions throughout a negotiation can yield more favorable outcomes than staying emotionally stable.

In one experiment featured in the study, students role-played face-to-face negotiations for a new business venture. Half the students were told to express either consistent anger or inconsistent emotions. Those told to express anger said things like, “You’re beginning to get on my nerves,” while those told to express inconsistent emotions also said things like, “I’m very happy we’re negotiating together.”

Results showed that students who expressed inconsistent emotions claimed greater value in the negotiations. And other experiments in which students alternated between anger and disappointment yielded similar findings.

The reason is likely because the partners of those expressing inconsistent emotions felt less control over the situation.

Interact through a virtual medium.

According to research from Imperial College London, presented at the Annual Conference of the British Psychological Society, face-to-face interactions tend to favor the more powerful person in the negotiation.

In one part of the study, 74 people participated in two-sided negotiations in which one party was more powerful than the other; in another part of the study, 63 people participated in three-sided talks where the levels of hierarchy varied. These talks either took place in person or in a 3D virtual simulation.

Results showed that the less powerful people performed better in the virtual settings. So you may want to consider petitioning your boss for a higher salary or a flexible schedule over email.

 

Businessinsider.com | February 18, 2016 | Drake Baer and Shana Lebowitz

#Leadership : 5 Signs Your Leadership Style Is Too Soft…There’s Huge Pressure on Leaders to Keep Employees Engaged & Inspired & to Create Workplaces that are Fun & Fulfilling. But Sometimes these Initiatives Go too Far & Bottom-Line Business Results Suffer.

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There’s huge pressure on leaders to keep employees engaged and inspired and to create workplaces that are fun and fulfilling. But sometimes these initiatives go too far and bottom-line business results suffer. Leaders turn overly soft and are so focused on making people happy that they forget to help employees be productive and efficient.

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There are four fundamental leadership styles: Diplomat, Pragmatist, Idealist and Steward. Leaders can be effective or ineffective within each of these four styles, but one style in particular is at the greatest risk of being too soft—the Diplomat. (There’s a leadership styles assessment to determine your own style.)

Diplomats prize interpersonal harmony. These leaders are kind, social, and giving, and typically build deep personal bonds with their employees. They’re often known for being able to resolve conflicts peacefully (and for avoiding conflicts in the first place). Working for Diplomats has been described as being more fun and social than working for other types of leaders. Diplomats put less emphasis on challenging their employees, focusing instead on putting their people in positions that leverage their strengths so they can reliably achieve success. And traditional measures of employee satisfaction are often very high for Diplomats.

As a leader you don’t ever want to stop focusing on inspiring and engaging your employees. But you do want to ensure that all the deep emotional connections you build with your employees and the level of challenge you create translate into exceptional bottom-line results. Pay attention to the warning signs, be engaging but not too accommodating, and you should achieve great success.

Working for a boss with a Diplomat leadership style can be an amazing experience. (Read more about all the leadership styles in my Forbes article“Which Of These 4 Leadership Styles Are You?”) But if any of the Diplomat characteristics sound similar to your leadership style, you want to make sure you don’t go to extremes. Here are five signs that your leadership style has become too yielding…

1. A 5-Minute Conversation Turns Into 50 Minutes

Imagine you give an employee a highly specific bit of constructive feedback (e.g. “this report is too long, shave off 1,000 words”). It’s the kind of feedback that requires no more of a response than “I got it, I’ll fix it now.” Now imagine that even though the feedback conversation should be done within 5 minutes, you find yourself engaged in a lengthy conversation with the employee about why they fell short, how that makes them feel, and why you’re somehow to blame for their mistakes.

Has that ever happened to you? If the answer is yes, that’s a good sign that you’ve become too appeasing. It’s good to encourage dialogue with your employees and it’s great when they feel comfortable sharing. But when employees believe they can talk themselves out of being criticized or held accountable, that’s a problem.

There are times when an employee just needs to say “I’m sorry. I messed up. I’ll fix it immediately.” That’s not indicative of a dictatorial environment; it’s usually just a sign of an efficient and accountable operation. There are some conversations that should be five minutes and done. So when you regularly feel like five-minute conversations are turning into 50-minute therapy sessions, that’s a strong sign that you’ve moved from approachable to acquiescent.

 

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2. Your Meetings Get Off Topic And Take Too Longg

Have you ever been in one of those meetings where a few of the big personalities just dominate the conversation? They talk louder than everyone else, including you. All you hear are their thoughts, their ideas, their yeas and their nays. The quieter employees feel totally shut out from participating. And even when you try to rein them in, they manage to barge right through and keep dominating.

Ideally meetings are value-adding forums where all invitees participate. Isn’t that why you called all those people into the meeting in the first place? Yet, when we struggle to control the loudmouths, when they don’t respect our authority (formal or otherwise), it’s a sign that we’re not being forceful or commanding enough.

Of course people should talk. Intense conversations can signal a healthy team. But there still needs to be someone in the room with enough power to keep the conversation on track, on time and thoroughly professional.

3. You Regularly Mediate Employee Conflicts (Instead Of Employees Solving Issues Themselves)

It’s troubling when a leader is regularly sucked into employee conflicts. In an ideal world, employees would act like adults and resolve conflicts themselves, reserving the boss-as-mediator for only the most serious issues. But when a leader has become too accommodating, employees quickly figure out that they plead their case to the boss and the boss will intervene on their behalf. It’s actually quite similar to the games that our kids play; whether it’s “ma, he’s looking at me funny” or playing one parent off another.

When the leader has a no-nonsense, ‘suck-it-up’ reputation, these manipulations are rare. But when the leader is seen as overly accommodating or appeasing, these games will be a frequent occurrence.

4. You See The Same Problem Multiple Times

There isn’t an organization on the planet that doesn’t have employees who make mistakes. That’s the price of doing business. But when you see employees making the same mistakes again and again, that’s often a sign that they haven’t gotten the message that they need to improve. And that’s often the result of employees believing that their gentle leader won’t really follow through on enforcing consequences.

I’m not suggesting that leaders move to the opposite extreme, where employees are risk-averse and paralyzed by fear of being fired. That’s every bit as damaging. Rather, the effective leader will find the middle ground of mistakes may be inevitable, but we all must strive to avoid making the same mistake repeatedly. Employees need to know if they don’t take their mistakes seriously, and work diligently and earnestly to improve, the consequences will be more than just a leader’s look of disappointment.

5. Employees Aren’t Learning New Things

One of the biggest leadership tests is: are your people learning new things? Because if they’re not, they’re not growing and developing and it’s a likely sign that your leadership style is too soft.

Making sure that people learn really isn’t that difficult. Once a month ask your people “Hey, what’s something you’re better at now than you were last month?” If they don’t have an answer, follow up with questions such as, “What would you like to get better at this next month?” and “What new skills are you going to have to develop this next year to reach your big goals?”

Give your people HARD Goals that challenge them and push them outside of their comfort zone and let them know that you believe they can do it. What’s interesting to think about is when you ask leaders, “What were the most significant goals you’ve ever achieved in your life, were they easy, or were they hard? The answer is always hard. And yet, those same leaders give employees too easy goals that are achievable and realistic and then wonder where the greatness is.

The best goals are not the ones that sit totally within your comfort zone. The best goals activate the brain and get the most neural activity going in a positive way. These are the goals that are 20 to 30 percent outside of your comfort zone, where you can look back on that goal and say, “Honestly, I wasn’t even totally sure I could pull that off. It was a doozy, but I’ll tell you what, I learned a ton.”

Conclusion

As a leader you don’t ever want to stop focusing on inspiring and engaging your employees. But you do want to ensure that all the deep emotional connections you build with your employees and the level of challenge you create translate into exceptional bottom-line results. Pay attention to the warning signs, be engaging but not too accommodating, and you should achieve great success.

Mark Murphy is a NY Times bestselling author, founder of Leadership IQ, aleadership training speaker and creator of the leadership styles assessment.

 

Forbes.com | February 11, 2016 | Mark Murphy

 

Your #Career : Bulletproof Your Position: 10 Tips For Improving Job Security…The Key to Job Survival is to Find Ways to Make yourself a More Valuable Employee, So you Stand Out From the Crowd.

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Sometimes, coming to work each day and doing your job isn’t enough to protect you from being let go due to “downsizing.” The key to job survival is to find ways to make yourself a more valuable employee, so you stand out from the crowd.

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Question: I’ve worked in the same job for several years, but there are rumors that our company will be laying off employees later this year to cut expenses. Is there anything I can start doing, right now, to help make sure I won’t be one of the employees laid off?

Answer: Most employment in the U.S. is “at-will,” which means an employee can be dismissed by their employer for any reason and without warning. That means the best way to decrease the odds of your employment being terminated is to create a strong relationship with your manager and to clearly demonstrate your value to the company (so your boss won’t want to lose you). Here’s how:

Understand your manager’s goals. Find out his or her objectives and priorities. What keeps your boss up at night? Think about ways you can help achieve these department goals.

Agree on your goals, objectives and projects. Meet with your manager to ensure you fully understand and mutually agree on your goals and objectives for the quarter/year as well as all projects for which you’ll be responsible. Then track and provide progress updates, asking for help or advice as needed.

 

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Create a “Goals and Objectives” document. Take those goals you agreed on with your manager and put them into a simple document where you’ll be able to track your progress. Use a simple format, like an Excel spreadsheet, and include column headers such as: ID#, Project Name, Description, Timing (due date), Goal/Objective (whatever it might be), Stretch Goal/Objective (a slightly more challenging goal or objective), and Progress (such as color coding to denote your progress). Use this document during your progress review meetings with your manager.

Learn your manager’s communication style and flex your style to his or hers. Find out how your manager prefers to interact with you. Do they want weekly, bi-weekly or monthly progress review meetings? Do they want to meet in person or receive email updates and then follow up with you if they have any questions? Adapt your communication style to best fit your manager’s style.

Never miss a commitment. Complete all your projects/assignments on time (and under budget). If you hit an obstacle, “go ugly early” as the old saying goes, by letting your boss know and asking for help.

Do outstanding work. You can’t do mediocre work – your work needs to be exemplary if you want to stand out. Look for ways you can go above and beyond the daily requirements to demonstrate how you add value to the organization.

Think of yourself as an “internal consultant.” Be more than just an employee. Consultants are hired to assess a current situation and then create action plans for improvement. They are paid for their expertise and their calm, professional demeanor, especially in times of difficulty. By thinking of yourself as an “internal consultant” you can use this same frame of reference to demonstrate how you add value to your department, to your company and even to your boss.

Become an expert in something. People turn to the experts when there are challenges and to solve problems. Look for areas in your business where you can put your skills to use and become an expert. Then, volunteer for projects that will allow you to use these skills and show them off.

Offer to help coworkers. Don’t wait for someone to approach you. Offer your help to others when it appears they might need it. Don’t expect any return favors – help others because you want to, not because you expect something in return. Always play nice with others and learn to flex your style so you can get along with any personality type.

Improve your skills every year. Become a more valuable asset by treating yourself like a product that you work on improving, year after year. Define your career aspirations, create a career development plan and then share this information with your boss and ask for his or her help and support.

Lisa Quast is the author of Secrets of a Hiring Manager Turned Career Coach: A Foolproof Guide to Getting the Job You Want. Every Time.

 

Forbes.com | February 15, 2016 | Lisa Quast 

 

Your #Career : How To Find A Second Act With Purpose…Today’s Workers are Already Anticipating the Need for Change with Plans to Extend their Working Lives.

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Once you have some picture of where you want to go, get things moving by taking small steps toward that vision. What really matters is that you do a little something on a regular basis.

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When Doug Rauch “retired” in 2008, he was 56. He had spent 31 years at Trader Joe’s, where he led the California grocery chain’s move to the East Coast, rising to president. But don’t call it “retired,” he calls it “graduation.”

Here’s why: While he planned to keep active serving on corporate and not-for-profit boards from his home in Newton, Mass, he quickly realized it wasn’t fulfilling enough for him.

Today, Rauch is headlong into his second act. His new venture opened in June of 2015: the tiny, 3,500-square-foot Daily Table, a not-for-profit grocery store he founded in the Dorchester neighborhood of Boston.

 Rauch, now 64, is part of a growing cohort of retired workers back at work, in part due to increasing lifespans and the desire to remain relevant. The rewards are threefold: financial, mental and physical.
“Today’s workers are already anticipating the need for change with plans to extend their working lives,” says Catherine Collinson, president of the Transamerica Center for Retirement Studies, who recently released a study, The New Flexible Retirement.

A Merrill Lynch study conducted in partnership with Age Wave, a research firm that focuses on aging, found that nearly three of every five working retirees said retirement was an opportunity to shift to a different line of work.

 

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How workers can successfully extend their working lives is a tricky issue, but one way is through upgrading skills and going back to school to pivot to new kinds of work. That’s what Rauch did and how his idea for Daily Table came to life. In 2010, he enrolled in Harvard University’s Advanced Leadership Initiative, which selects applicants –most of whom are in their fifties and sixties — from the top echelons of their industries to return to campus for a year to develop new skills, make new contacts and reflect on what’s next.

He was fortunate to have had that opportunity. But there are lots of ways to make the move to nonprofit work at this stage of life. Here are 10 steps you can take–preferably before you retire from your old job–to find new work with purpose in your next chapter.

Get financially fit. Debt is a dream killer–one of my favorite mantras. If you’re financially fit, it gives you options. You’re nimble enough to try things out, or work for less than you did in the past, for the reward of loving what you do and knowing you’re having an impact on the world around you.

Shape-up. To fight ageism in the workplace, you must have the stamina for a new beginning; you need to be physically in shape and stick to a healthy diet. You don’t have to bench-press heavy weights or run fast miles, mind you, but you do need to have a level of fitness. It will show. You exude energy and a can-do, positive vibe. People want what you have. It subtly shows hiring managers that you’re up for the job.

Take time to reflect. “Carve out solitude, space, and time to consider what kind of mission speaks to you,” says Marci Alboher, the author of The Encore Career Handbook. You need a certain amount of humility to switch to nonprofit work. There’s a shared sense of the mission, a collaborative decision-making environment. If you’re used to being an independent worker or a leader, this might not be a suitable fit without an attitude adjustment.

Do an inventory of your existing skills and interests. How can you redeploy your financial expertise, for example,  or your tech know-how or management skills on a new path?

Consider working with a career or life coach to talk through steps needed to make the shift. Successful career shifters typically set flexible time frames of three to five years to move into a new field. Finding what you want to do next is a process, so be patient.

Study up. Return to school for a tune up or a skills refresh. In addition to the Harvard’Advanced Leadership Initiative that Rauch attended, The StanfordDistinguished Careers Institute also offers a program for professionals in their 50s and 60s and beyond.

Be practical, though, when it comes to spending on education. If possible, take some classes while your current employer is still offering tuition reimbursement (though be sure to investigate whether there’s a payback requirement if you leave).

You might easily be able to hone your existing skills for the non-profit sector with just a course or two, e.g. accounting for not-for-profits. (Seton Hall Universitymaintains a searchable list of non-profit management courses across the country.)

Some other innovative programs: EncoreHartford, a 16-week fellowship program, begun by the University of Connecticut’s Nonprofit Leadership Program and now in its sixth year, has helped more than 100 corporate professionals, mostly older than 50, convert their corporate expertise to the nonprofit world. The program costs $2,950. It includes a crash course in nonprofit management and finance held in local nonprofits and a two month, 30-hour per week fellowship at a local nonprofit. Encore.org is working to increase learning opportunities through its EncoreU and a limited number offellowship programs outside the classroom. Pace University in New York offers an Encore Transition Program, aimed at helping executives and professionals explore swops from midlife careers to nonprofit and public service organizations. (Pace’s program, like the one at the University of Connecticut, has no ties to Encore.org.) The tuition is $795, and classes are limited to about a dozen student

Subscribe to the Chronicle of Philanthropy. Start reading articles and follow the thought leaders in the sector of the industry you’re interested in on LinkedIn and Twitter.

Develop a nonprofit-oriented resume. Your resume must show what experience you have and how it relates to the organization you’re interviewing with. Your cover letter must show why you want to work for that group and precisely what skills you have in your tool kit to help the organization with its goals.

Volunteer. If there’s an organization whose mission calls to you, raise your hand. “Get out of your head and into the world,” says Alboher. Look into volunteer opportunities to start developing some in-depth experience in an area that interests you and taps into your expertise. Serve on a board.

This builds your network and gets people to start thinking of you in new ways. Volunteering can also freshen your skills and stretch new muscles. Once you’re inside of an organization and its leaders get to know you and your skill set, it can lead to paid opportunities down the road.

To find organizations where you might get involved, check out web sites such asCommongood Careers and The Bridgespan Group. Other helpful sites includeBoardnetUSA, Handsonnetwork.org,Idealist.org and Volunteermatch.org. AARP also has a “Volunteer Wizard” match-up board. Look around your community. Where might you lend a hand?

 Do some pro bono consulting. Take on a consulting assignment for a local charity gratis. This may segue to a paid consulting job and to more permanent duties once you test the waters.

 Reach out to your network to ask for help. Whom do you know in the nonprofit field? Tap your Linkedin and other social media connections to search for possible contacts. Book an advice and counseling lunch or coffee to brainstorm. Always ask for another name or two of people you might be able to reach out to for guidance.

Polish your elevator speech. Nonprofits want to hear why you want this specific job for this specific cause and how it resonates with your personal story. Your passion and commitment for the organization and cause is the thing that sets you apart from other candidates. Wear your heart on your sleeve. Getting good at explaining this is crucial.

 One last tip: Do something daily to inch toward your goal. “Don’t struggle to find an ideal starting point, or perfect path,” says Clearways Consulting career coach Beverly Jones, author of Think Like an Entrepreneur, Act Like a CEO: 50 Indispensable Tips to Help You Stay Afloat, Bounce Back, and Get Ahead at Work.

Once you have some picture of where you want to go, get things moving by taking small steps toward that vision. What really matters is that you do a little something on a regular basis.

For Rauch, the impetus to start a second act was a lingering feeling that he wasn’t in love with his job anymore. “I didn’t have the gas left in the tank, and I had the sense that it was simply time to do something different, make a difference and make an impact.”

Follow me on Twitter, @KerryHannon Visit me at Kerryhannon.com

 

Forbes.com | February 16, 2016 | Kerry Hannon