Your #Career : The Perfect Career? Why There’s No Such Thing as a Dream Job…Holding on to the Idea that You Will One Day Find your Dream Job is a Quick Way to Set yourself Up for Disappointment. You’ll Never be Happy if you Continue to Believe this. Instead, you’ll be Tired, Frustrated, & Bitter.

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After graduating from college, you may have had high hopes of finding the perfect job. You’ve probably heard friends and acquaintances brag about how dreamy their jobs were and how they can’t believe they’re getting paid to do what they do. You wanted what they had, so you embarked on a search for your own perfect job.

Free- Men in Socks

However, your hopes were quickly dashed after working at a series of crappy jobs and dealing with one too many horrible bosses. A job may seem perfect in the beginning, but that feeling usually doesn’t last long. Here’s why there’s no such thing as a dream job.

Your job satisfaction is up to you

A job is what you make it. It can be a truly miserable experience, it can be just OK, or it can eventually turn into a dream job. It’s all about your attitude. You can make small changes to make your job as close to a dream job as possible, but it will take some effort.

Career expert Allison Chesteron says we are each authors of our careers. It’s up to you to carve out a satisfying career path. She had this to say on her blog:

A “dream job” sounds like a fantasy. It belies the true messiness, the yearning to wander, the serendipitous nature of what it means to author a career. The term seeks to tie all the frayed ends up in a perfect little bow, failing to acknowledge what it means to take your future into your own hands and create it from scratch. It’s a fatuous term that doesn’t belong in the lexicon of career discovery and job search. It’s a fallacy. Don’t let it fool you.

 

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All jobs have flaws

There are no perfect jobs because there are no perfect people. You’ll encounter people from time to time who will make your workday miserable. They may even make you question your chosen field. You aren’t perfect either. Your feelings about your work will likely change from day to day and from week to week. These feelings can (and often do) color the way you view your job.

Dr. Alex Lickerman, Psychology Today contributor and founder and CEO of ImagineMD, said our imperfection is the reason why our jobs will never be ideal. “The real reason no job can ever be perfect is because we won’t ever be perfect,” Lickerman said. “We’ll always have a constantly shifting life condition that makes today seem awful even though yesterday we felt great doing the exact same thing; we’ll always keep making new mistakes; we’ll always on occasion fail in a big way; and we’ll never be able avoid having others dislike our work.”

There will always be something wrong no matter where you work. So if you’re job hopping in search of the perfect job, you’ll never find it. Once you let go of the idea that there is a perfect job out there, you’ll be able to find happiness at work or at least be somewhat satisfied.

You’re setting yourself up for disappointment

Holding on to the idea that you will one day find your dream job is a quick way to set yourself up for disappointment. You’ll never be happy if you continue to believe this. Instead, you’ll be tired, frustrated, and bitter. And these feelings will eventually become evident when you go on job interviews, further diminishing your chances of finding the right job.

You’ll miss out on opportunities

Putting your happiness on hold until you find the perfect job will also cause you to become overly focused on the future. Consequently, you could miss out on good opportunities right now. Maria Tomaino, job search strategist and associate director of alumni career development at Florida International University, said focusing too much time and energy on the future is almost as bad as living in the past. It’s just as important to focus on your current moves.

There’s no such thing as a dream job. The mentality of ‘if I was just doing ___, then I’ll be happy’ is not only untrue, but dangerous thinking. Why? Because it’s a hypothetical. It lives in the future. It’s not reality. That’s a lot of pressure that you are putting on yourself. That’s a lot of power you are putting into a job. It’s precarious thinking; always looking to the future and not being in the present. It puts our blinders up: To think the only path is that “dream job” path and makes us miss other opportunities that come our way.

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CheatSheet.com | July 20, 2016 | 

 

#Leadership : 6 Keys to Employee Engagement During Times of Distraction…Gallup concluded that 71% of all Employees are either “Not engaged” or “Actively Disengaged.” In Simple Terms, Most Workers are Producing Far Less than They were Capable of Producing.

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The problem of disengagement can become even more pronounced during the summer months or any time there is an economic slowdown. Employee attention tends to wander off to those “those lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer” rather than their work responsibilities

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So what can you do to keep your employees engaged, their morale high and performance at its peak during times of distraction?

1. Recognize disengagement.
You can’t fix it if you don’t even know it exists. Fortunately, it’s visible. You see it in their eyes.

As Eric Allenbaugh writes in HR Magazine, there are two eye patterns that indicate disengagement.

There are the glazed eyes. As one 42-year-old manager said, “It stopped being fun here 16 years ago.” His glazed eyes and numb spirit said it all.

There are the beady eyes. A bright, yet disenchanted three-year employee said, “This place sucks, and I can hardly wait to get out of here.” Her beady eyes communicated a strong message of discontent.

I would add a third: distracted eyes. By simply looking at someone, you can tell if they’re mentally present or somewhere else. This is especially common during the summer or when business is slow.

 

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2. Consider the high cost of disengagement.
When a company pays an employee $30 an hour (or any amount of money) to perform a task, that company is entitled to $30 of productivity each hour in return. If the employees give anything less, they are — in effect — stealing from the company.

You can’t allow that to happen. It’s too expensive. It destroys the employees’ self-esteem, because no one can feel good about him or herself doing just enough to get by.

3. Make sure you are not a part of the problem.
I often ask my audience members how many of them ever came across a job candidate who didn’t want to be there, who disliked the company, its products and its customers and then thought to themselves, “That’s just the kind of employee I want” and went ahead and hired that individual. No one raises their hands.

So I ask them, “If no one ever hired a person like that, then why do companies have so many of them?” It’s because something happened to those employees during the course of their employment that turned them off.

According to Terri Kabachnick, in her book I Quit, But Forgot to Tell You, some of the most common causes of disengagement are a lack of information, lack of job purpose and lack of respect. To re-engage your people or prevent disengagement during your slowdown periods in the business, you must …

Related: The 12 Steps to Happiness That You Create (Infographic)

4. Keep them fully informed.
In one Chamber of Commerce study, 50,000 employees from all types of industries were asked to rank the 10 factors that had the biggest impact on their morale and motivation. Not surprisingly, the employees listed “being in on things” or “being fully informed” as the second strongest morale-building, motivating factor in the workplace.

After studying the communication patterns in dozens of organizations, Tamotsu Shibutani concluded, “You had better keep your people informed, or they’ll make it up, and it won’t be flattering.”

If you want an engaged workforce, you’ve got to communicate, communicate and then communicate some more.

5. Instill a sense of job purpose.
It’s almost impossible for employees to spend five, 10 or 20 years on a job and feel good about themselves if they think their jobs are a colossal waste of time. Employees need to know more than what a job entails, and employees need to know more than how to do a job. They also need to know why they’re doing a job.

A part of leadership is making sure that your people come in every day feeling like they are working on the most important thing. This is especially important when your people may be thinking more about some outdoor summer activities than their jobs.

To build an “engaged” culture where you engage the disengaged, you’ve got to tell people that their work matters. You’ve got to show people that their jobs have a purpose that only they can fulfill.

6. Show respect.
You may think this strategy only applies to the younger generations in the workplace. After all, we keep hearing about how needy the younger generations are — asking for more recognition, more challenges, more autonomy, more communication and more rewards. But a baby boomer in his 60s put it this way in one of my workshops: “We want the same things. We just felt we couldn’t ask.”

When your younger workers badger you for more respect and recognition, just remember all your employees crave the same thing. Their communication methods may differ, but their needs don’t. Employees want to be regarded first and foremost as people who are respected.

That’s why most of an employee’s productivity is directly attributable to his or her manager. If an employee feels like he or she is nothing more than a number filling a time slot for a manager, the employee is not going to be fully engaged.

To show your respect, treat each employee as an individual. Get to know each person’s strengths and weaknesses and likes and dislikes. Call each person by his or her name.

Certainly, good weather, summertime activities and an economic slowdown can distract your employees. It may even contribute to their lack of engagement. But with these six tips, you can keep your people fully engaged, for their own good as well as the company’s.

Entrepreneur.com | August 31, 2015 | Alan Zimmerman

 

#Leadership : Feeling Overwhelmed? Take A Minute (Really 1 Min) & Read This…If you Find you’re Overwhelmed, Take the Time to Process this Privately, So that Public Communication to Employees & Others Can be Done Professionally & Proactively.

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We all feel overwhelmed at times. Unfortunately, this is a normal feeling for most of us. The important thing is to realize that this is a momentary state. By shifting into action, you can get rid of this uncomfortable feeling.

Sad businessman sitting at workplace and trying to find solution of problem

In most cases, the first reaction to something that’s frustrating is to focus on how this is not a great situation and question, “Why is it happening to me?” This kind of thinking, while natural, is not conducive to resolving the situation. The best thing you can do to alleviate this feeling is to start taking action and focus your energy on resolution.

In almost all situations where you feel overwhelmed, follow this five-step plan:

• Slow down

• Ask questions

• Get your bearings

• Develop a plan that you believe in

• Take proactive actions

Recognizing that feeling overwhelmed is an emotional state that can be overcome through a measured, practiced approach has been one of the skills I’ve benefitted most from over my career (I’ve had several jobs that have had lots of crises and drama in them. I’m not sure why I’m so lucky). For more on this topic, David Rock’s Your Brain at Work gives a fantastic overview of the cognitive limits of the brain.

 

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At this point, I don’t need to actually have achieved improvement to get rid of the overwhelmed feeling; I just need a plan that I believe in that I can start executing.

Here are a few recommendations that work:

• Proactively manage your calendar and your to-dos. Anticipate as much as possible. Ask yourself, what’s likely to interrupt the most important things? Develop ways to absorb the “bomb-ins.”

• Don’t expect perfection on all of your to-dos, but expect to accomplish the most important things. I’ve always found that worrying about how long something will take to get done is far worse than the actual time it usually takes to do it. So, as Nike says, “Just do it.”

• Build time in every week for reflection and ensuring you’re grounded on what matters most. All of us are busy, but we must not confuse action with traction.

• Try very hard to not be a bottleneck. This will make you much more likable and make the team much more productive.

We’re all faced with feeling overwhelmed at times, but it’s not becoming for a leader to appear overwhelmed. Remember, people will take their cue on how to handle a situation from you. You will generally have information ahead of most others in the company. If you find you’re overwhelmed, take the time to process this privately, so that public communication to employees and others can be done professionally and proactively.

The most important thing to do when you are overwhelmed is to stay calm , and recognize that the best thing to do to conquer the sensation is to shift into taking action and executing on a well-thought out plan. Good luck and onward!  

Forbes.com | July 19, 2016 | Maynard Webb

#Leadership : How to Create a Cohesive Company Culture…Most Importantly, you Need to Live & Die by these Values if you Expect Them to be More Than just Lip Service & Words on a Wall.

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I’ve spent the past decade building a company that is now the largest patient-physician platform in the U.S., and I believe one of the reasons why it was so successful was because of the company culture we put in place from the day the company was founded. This is the same reason I laid out company culture first when founding my most recent company, iBeat.

Free- Stones stacked on each other

When starting a company, you have the opportunity to set it apart by building a winning and cohesive culture. Culture is crucial, and it can make or break a company. In my many years of growing startups, I’ve learned that building a cohesive culture ultimately rests on two major foundations — a company’s mission and its core values.

First and foremost, a company must have a compelling and inspirational mission. Before you even start your company, you should think long and hard about why you’re doing it. If it’s only to make money, I recommend you go back to the drawing board. Your mission should cover both how you are of service to others, as well as what is so compelling and unique about what the team is doing that would make you want to still be doing it ten years from now.

Stating the mission.
When crafting your mission statement, aim to be energizing, aspirational, and memorable. Don’t get bogged down with fluff and buzz words that are vague and meaningless. Get to the point. If your employees can’t relate to it, then your mission statement won’t mean much to your customers either. Also, make it concise. If you can’t say it in a sentence or two, you haven’t nailed it.

At iBeat, our mission statement is, “Empowering people with the freedom to be fearless, explore, and live longer lives.” Notice it’s not about us. It’s about how we aim to do something greater — empower people.

An exceptional mission statement captures your brand and persona. It helps you stand apart from competitors and simplifies your strategic direction, but some mission statements — the truly great ones — surprise, inspire and transform. They provide purpose. They guide and help unify organizations, and they go hand-in-hand with company culture. Take the time and do this right, and it will pay dividends over the duration.

Be sure to ingrain this mission into your team from day one. At Practice Fusion, learning the mission was not only part of new hire training, but one Friday a month, we gather all new team members and test them on our mission in front of the entire company — they’re usually prepared!

 

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Identifying core values.
Next, an exceptional company culture rests on a strong set of core values. A company’s core values are the attributes you want instilled in your team, as well as rules and guidelines covering everything from how the team treats and interacts with one another to how customers are treated. If implemented correctly, you should be able to hire and fire based on these values.

Core values form a solid bedrock for any organization and really matter to the individuals. Think about your company personality and how it will play into your core values. Are you innovative and witty or quirky and creative? Do you foster a work hard, play hard mentality? If so, create that balance of work and play. Are you a true collaborator? Then advance that behavior in your company and promote the people who get it.

iBeat has six simple and straightforward core values. They are:

We execute without excuses.
We are radically honest.
We put community first.
We are pros.
We are operationally ruthless.
We work to live, not live to work.
These values help us immensely when hiring but also help keep us grounded. We aim to hire intellectual athletes who want more than just a job and a salary. We hire individuals who were excited to be part of new technology that is helping empower people to live longer, fuller lives.

Delivering the message.
Once values are defined, they have to be explained and socialized. I suggest starting with a company-wide, all-hands meeting devoted to rolling out and discussing the values.

Also, bear in mind, values also need to be constantly reinforced. We do this in multiple ways.

For example, one of the first things you see when you arrive in our office is a large wall with the company mission and values emblazoned on it. We also start every new employee training with the values, and we make sure they are aware and aligned with our vision, mission, strategy and values. Additionally, we recognize employees every month for their exemplification of the values. As you scale, you can implement tools like Bonusly and gamify recognition based on these core values.

Taking the time to define a strong company mission and core values breathes life into your employees. It’s the first step in assuring your company culture thrives and survives for the duration. If done correctly, it will be the reason people join your company, and if done incorrectly, it will definitely be the reason most people leave.

Lastly, and most importantly, you need to live and die by these values if you expect them to be more than just lip service and words on a wall. If ‘integrity with no compromise’ is one of your core values, but you knowingly allow people to stay on your team that lie, cheat, or steal, then no one will take your values seriously, and the organization will be compromised.

In contrast, if you see behavior that violates your core values, and you immediately act to remove that person from your team, the rest of the team will respect that decision, as you are acting to ensure the company value system is held high.

We’re searching for top company cultures to be featured on our annual list. Think your company has what it takes? Apply Now »

 

Entrepreneur.com | July 18, 2016 | Ryan Howard

Your #Career : 4 Ways To Get More Meaning And Value From Your Career Starting Today…The Ingredient that’s Absent from So many Thousands of People’s Careers is ‘Meaning’ – the Feeling & Heartfelt Sense that what They are Doing has a Strong Purpose, a Positive Impact in the World, & Offers Something to People that Will Make a Difference, & have Lasting Value.

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I hear from scores of professionals each week with every complaint you can imagine about their jobs, work-life challenges, and their unfulfilling careers. Surprisingly, there is one ingredient these careers are missing that causes the most long-term pain and concern (excluding toxicity, abuse and mistreatment).

Free- Women walking on Narrow Bridge

The ingredient that’s absent from so many thousands of people’s careers is meaning – the feeling and heartfelt sense that what they are doing has a strong purpose, a positive impact in the world, and offers something to people that will make a difference, and have lasting value.

Most professionals believe that they have to chuck their entire careers and start over, in order to find more meaning in their work. They often fantasize about doing something creative or altruistic (like start a non-profit, join the Peace Corps, work on a communal farm, write a book, start a bed and breakfast, or move to another country entirely) to bring more meaning into their work.  But they are often mistaken. You don’t have to uproot your entire life and career to create more meaning and value. You can do it literally starting today, wherever you are.

In fact, I’d go so far as to say if you are thinking of running as far away as possible from your current career, to something radically different in order to create more meaning, you should stop in your tracks and do some powerful inner and outer work before you take the next step.

Here are four critical steps to creating more meaning in your work right now:

Dimensionalize “meaning” for you

Each and every one of us is different in terms of what we care about.  What matters to us deeply, and what brings us a sense of being valuable and helpful in the world, is shaped by many influences, including:

– your childhood

– your ancestry

– your cultural training

– the people you care for and respect

– the problems in the world that hurt your heart

– the traumas you’ve experienced and the triumphs in your life

– your special and amazing talents and gifts that come easily to you

– the way in which you operate in the world

– your personality (including extroversion or  introversion, positive mindset, action style, etc.)

… and much more.

You can’t create more meaning in your life and work if you don’t understand yourself intimately or know what matters to you personally, at a very deep level.

I’m always surprised when professionals can’t identify what matters to them, or what they’re great at. Often, this lack of self-awareness points to a significant internal block– that they were somehow suppressed in childhood, and/or punished for thinking for themselves. Overly-protective, critical or narcissist parents are highly threatened by children who try to act and think independently. And it can go very badly for the child or young adult who wants to strike out on his/her own.

If you’re blocked internally and can’t get to the heart of what you care about and what makes you you, then the way you were raised might have had a strong hand in your inability to understand yourself and what matters to you most. (Read more on how being raised by a narcissist alters our ability to think for ourselves).

 

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Don’t wait for meaning to fall in your lap – seize it

Step 2 in this process involves expanding your own accountability. It’s critical to realize that whatever you want in life won’t just fall in your lap – you have to go out and proactively get it. That takes clarity, confidence, courage and connection, and those four elements don’t just happen to us. We have to take the time to build our internal strength, and expand our repertoire of external behaviors in a way that will allow us to create and attract what we want.

So, to build more meaning in your work today, first identify the shortest avenue to doing more meaningful work, in your current situation.  Ask to join a new task force at work, start a new project, volunteer to be part of a team that is doing something you care about, research a new direction for the organization that you could oversee.  It’s easier than you think. Talk to your manager about what you’d like to get involved with, and get his/her support to pursue a new direction within your role that would excite you and offer something of value to the organization.

If you believe that’s not possible within your role, then start interviewing outside and networking expansively. Identify clearly what you’re looking to be a part of, and talk to anyone and everyone you can find who might be helpful. Get more clarity on exactly what you could be doing differently that would feel meaningful and purposeful to you, and start doing it.

As an example, I’m a trained coach and marriage and family therapist, and I’ve always had a therapeutic lens to my work. But this year, I decided to add a new healing dimension to my coaching, and am making strides to do that. It’s truly not hard, once you realize what you want, and muster the courage to go out and find new ways to bring more meaning into your daily life.

Ask for higher-level help – find mentors and sponsors at a higher level of thinking and operating

What keeps the majority of unhappy professionals stuck for years is that they’re trying to solve their problem on the level of consciousness that created it, and that’s impossible. You have to ask for help, but the “right” kind of help.  We hear constantly about the need and value of finding mentors and sponsors to support us, and this is not an empty cliché. It’s vitally important that you get help from people who are demonstrating a higher level of thinking and behavior than you’re currently accessing.

To find powerful mentors, don’t ask a stranger.  Put yourself directly into the circle (either in person or online) where these people are interacting and connecting, and make yourself valuable to them there.  Don’t reach out with your hand out – but connect from the heart, and find authentic, generous ways in which you can support their work and demonstrate your value to them. (Here’s more on how to find a wonderful mentor who will open amazing doors for you.)

Finally, stop procrastinating and making excuses, and start doing and being

In the past four years, I’ve witnessed a phenomenon that blows my mind around fatal procrastination. Here’s one example – I run online career courses and when they’re promoted, there are deadlines for people to enroll.  Each time I promote a course, a good percentage enroll within the last 5-10 minutes of the deadline. Five minutes. And still others write me days after the deadline, apologizing for their delay (with all sorts of excuses), asking me to extend the deadline. Then half of those people don’t end up pulling the trigger.

Procrastination is a fatal behavior, because you’re continually killing off important opportunities to grow and become who you want to be. Yes, it’s scary and intimidating to make change and stretch. That’s the human condition. But only when you can act in the face of your fears and insecurity can you ever build a life and career that is full of meaning for you.  Why? Because pursuing what is meaningful to you is a heart- and spirit-centered endeavor, and when our hearts and spirits are involved, there’s a lot at risk and we’re frightened of blowing it.  But those who have built great meaning in their life found a way to push through the deep fears and resistance, and pulled themselves out of their comfort zones.  They finally did something bold. But bold doesn’t have to mean throwing your entire life and career out. Bold can be one small but significant step.

In the end, if you continue to resist becoming more accountable — and taking concrete action — to create more meaning in your life, then you’ll persist in pushing away any chance of having it.

 

Forbes.com | July 18, 2016 | Kathy Caprino

 

 

#Leadership : Determine Your Life’s Purpose in 10 Minutes. What’s yours? ….. Are we Spending our ‘Time’ Doing What we were Really Put on this Earth to Do?

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There are activities in life that no matter how much time you spend on them, or how intensely you focus on them, they give you energy. These are the activities that you need to invest time in, for they provide the path to fulfilling your purpose in life.

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What’s my purpose in life?   It’s an easy question to ponder and lose time contemplating. We’ve all been guilty of dwelling on it at some point. Those who know their purpose and go after it with conviction, they seem so “lucky,” while the rest of us are lost in a world of gray, moving from day to day wondering if what we do really matters, if we’re spending our time doing what we were really put on this earth to do.

 

But the search for our purpose isn’t some impossible philosophical exercise. Nor is it something that you need to spend your whole life searching for and struggling to determine. Because you already know the answer, and you’ve actually known it your entire life.  It’s right in front of your nose. Or perhaps more accurately, it’s within your nose, through your lungs and at the core of your central nervous system.

The answer is the same for everyone yet different at the same time. The answer is: Energy.

 

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But not just any energy.

As human beings, we have been given countless and miraculous gifts. God, the universe, the universal mind – whatever you want to call it based on whatever you believe — gave us the spectacular gift of life. And not just any life. A unique life.  A life that, while connected to everyone else, is uniquely ours.

And after the gift of life – which is certainly our greatest gift – the second greatest gift is the gift of Energy.

I’m not talking about the superficial (and lowercase) energy you get from coffee or going for a run, or after receiving a compliment or recognition.

I’m talking about the Energy at the core of your being, the Energy you were given before birth, and the Energy that makes you unique. The Energy that you’re either working with in life or against. The Energy that you either obey – because you know that your purpose in life is going with its flow — or the Energy you don’t recognize, leading to a life of enduring pain.

The Energy that was given to you as your day-in and day-out guide to fulfilling your purpose in life.

You see, the simplest way to know if you’re fulfilling your purpose in life is to ask yourself “How painful are my days? How hard and taxing is my work?” If your answer to these questions is anything on the medium to high scale, you’re not living your purpose.

You were designed to fulfill a certain purpose. It’s not something you create in your life. This purpose existed before you were born. To fulfill this purpose, you need to follow what your Energy is telling you. How do you know if you’re not paying attention?

When people go with the flow of their Energy, life seems almost too easy, too effortless. When you’re going against the flow of your Energy, everything seems needlessly difficult.

There are activities in life that no matter how much time you spend on them, or how intensely you focus on them, they give you energy. These are the activities that you need to invest time in, for they provide the path to fulfilling your purpose in life.

Then there are other activities in life – and this makes up the majority of activities, or all those outside of your unique abilities — that no matter what, drain you of energy. Regardless of how much you try to optimize your efforts, plan for their success or train to improve in them, these activities just suck the life out of you. There is nothing that can be done to make these activities align with your Energy, and thus you’re not fulfilling your purpose in life while engaged in them.

As human beings, it’s so easy for us to ignore our strengths because we don’t see them as strengths. Our strengths can feel deceptively insignificant, like everyone in the world possesses them. But they don’t. In fact, your most effortless activities will be the most impressive to others. And this has always been the universe’s plan.

If you’re operating within your strengths – or in alignment with your Energy — your activities will feel effortless. In the beginning it will feel like you’re not doing anything special, but stop connecting your level of pain with your level of impact. Instead, do what comes naturally to you, and allow your results to be your feedback.

When you’re invested in your strengths, abiding by your Energy, and avoiding those things that are so obviously not you, the results will blow beyond anything you’ve experienced before. It’s not going to happen overnight. Results in the physical world lag the immediate results we can experience in the spiritual and mental world, but it will happen. After all, our physical reality is nothing but a reflection of our former thinking, a reflection of our former alignment to our own unique Energy.

We’ve been brought-up to believe that you should push yourself out of your comfort zone. That you need to endure pain, suffering and back-breaking work to achieve success and fulfillment. And while massive sacrifice, a steadfast commitment toward your compelling future and significant time spent working within your unique ability are essential to achieving success, the point is that it doesn’t have to be painful.

Does this mean you shouldn’t work hard? Does this mean that you shouldn’t train to constantly get better? Does this mean that the achievement that you seek will come immediately? No, definitely not.

It simply means that the work you do should resonate with your Energy. Your activities should give you back more energy than you put in. You should feel exhausted at the end of the day, but not from pain and stress, but rather because the Energy in your core is overheating and needs to be recharged overnight to allow you to attack the next day with even more gusto.

Here’s three steps to finding your purpose in life.

Write down what activities (or activity) in life gives you more energy than you put in.

These are the activities where you can completely max out and use up your physical energy, and by doing so, you create more energy, making you simply want to do more. These activities “feel right,” and even though you work intensely on them, it feels effortless. The tough times, no matter how tough, are worthwhile. It’s never a matter of “if” these activities will produce the right results, but “when.” These activities follow the following principal:

Mental and spiritual energy out > physical energy in

I recommend conducting this exercise with other people close to you and who support your betterment. As stated above, it can be very difficult for people to identify their own strengths and unique abilities.

Related: 7 Apps to Help Integrate Tech With Self-Improvement Goals

For me, that which gives me the greatest energy is speaking, inspiring, writing and teaching on the topics of human connection, high performance and life optimization. When I do this, I’m on fire, meaning I’m a better leader, a better husband, a better friend and everything in my life seems to have intense clarity. For this reason, I’ve learned that my purpose in life – what my Energy is guiding me to do — is to proactively drive others to become better versions of themselves.

Write down the activities in life that drain you of energy.

Be honest with yourself.

We have been ingrained to think we should be good at certain things. Leaders should be great managers, but this is not necessarily true. We’re taught to think, “If I don’t excel at operations, I’ll never be able to build a great company.” False.  “As a CEO I should be the company’s best sales person.” Who said that?

Related: 4 Simple Strategies to Turn Your Passion Into a Paycheck

The point it that there is no should. There is simply what vibes with you and what doesn’t. There are your unique abilities, and then there’s everything else. Stop pretending that you like certain activities when you hate them. Stop putting your weaknesses ahead of your strengths. Have the courage to be ok with not liking everything and not being good at everything. Only when you do this is true greatness – your true purpose in life — possible.

Obey your Energy.

Or more specifically, immediately start to figure out how to do more of No. 1 and less of No. 2. And once you’re Energy-aligned, give it everything you’ve got.

Just because you’re Energy-aligned and fulfilling your purpose in life, it doesn’t mean that everything will be perfect. It doesn’t mean that you’ll be great or even really good at what you do. But it does mean that you’ll feel good and that things will feel right. And with a commitment and a trust that the Energy inside you isn’t all for naught, but rather is a guide for you to fulfill your full potential, you’ll eventually create what you were meant to create. You’ll make the magic you are supposed to make. You’ll be, and become great.

Related: 5 Key Books Every Entrepreneur Should Read

Because your purpose in life is a never-ending journey. Those who recognize their Energy and are guided by it will always know their purpose and will be able to get back on track when an errant drifting-off occurs. Your purpose in life is not to do one thing, but rather, to be you.

You’re a human being, not a human doing, and your purpose is to be the human your Energy guides you to be every single day.

 

Entrepreneur.com  |  July 15, 2016 | Sean Kelly 

#Leadership : How To Improve Your Decision Making Skills…In Order for the Brain to Make Decisions, it Often Relies on Short Cuts.

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Sometimes we may not have all the necessary information available, other times we only use a limited amount of information offered.  This means we regularly make decisions based on just a few facts or what first comes to mind based on our previous experience and knowledge.  These strategies are known as heuristics and can be useful for speed and agility, but can also lead to all sorts of errors.  It is therefore, useful to be aware of this.

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To empower everyone this way will lead to all employees making better decisions quickly and effectively.  And think how much life at work will be improved.

If you know that you, like everyone else, is susceptible to cognitive heuristics you can take this into account when making important decisions and seek more information than you think you needed in the first place.  It sounds obvious, but is not always acted upon.

Think of an everyday business scenario.  You’re confident in your ability to interview people and select the right candidate for the job.  You spend time with your new employee, explaining the ethos of the company and what needs to be done.  In fact, you pride yourself on your ability to delegate.

 

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As far as you are concerned you have laid the foundations for success, so why is their ability to make a decision so hard, even on relatively minor things?  In fact, it’s driving you to distraction because people are just not thinking for themselves and making a responsible judgment.

Very little is done without a decision being made, so it’s vital that everyone in your team is able to make decisions quickly and skilfully.  If you or your people hesitate for too long, money can be lost and morale can plummet.  And in our fast-changing world this is more important today than ever before.

Every employee must not only be capable, but also feel confident and clear in making decisions quickly within the guidelines of basic company policy.  Of course, the bigger problems will need to be presented to the next level of management.  But for everyday challenges the agility of each person’s judgements is vital for a company to run smoothly.

There will be times however, that a decision proves to be difficult and more time is needed.  Time for seeking informed opinions from others is sensible, because a poor decision is of no benefit to anyone.

So how do we help our people to develop better decision making skills?

Being aware of how the brain has a preference for short cuts is a useful start.  But it is also important that everyone who works for your company understands the bigger picture, the reasons you are selling your particular products or services, where the business wants to be in 6 months, 1 year and 5 years time.  When everyone is aware of the ‘grand plan’ they will know where they fit in the great scheme and how they can contribute.  This kind of clarity leads to sensible decisions being made.

This can be extended to where the business fits in society and how it benefits others.  When we have a balanced outlook on life we are empowered to calmly work things out from experience.

Calm leads to the fourth enabler for decision making.  When we work on the first three suggestions printed here, we are more likely to be stress free.  If we become chronically stressed, cortisol the stress hormone interferes with our memory, motivation and ability to think clearly.  It makes sense therefore, to put these foundations in place so as to remain calm, efficient and even healthy.

To recap, the four suggestions offered are:

    1. Be aware of cognitive heuristics – ask more questions and gather more data than you originally thought you needed.
    2. Make sure everyone in the business is aware of the bigger picture and how they can contribute well.
    3. Look further out to society in general and where the business benefits others. This knowledge and experience will empower improved decision making.
    4. These first three tips will help you stay calm and not succumb to disenabling stressors.

To empower everyone this way will lead to all employees making better decisions quickly and effectively.  And think how much life at work will be improved.

 

Forbes.com | July 17, 2016  |  Lynda Shaw

Your #Career : What I Learned When I Got Laid Off In A City I’d Just Moved…To This Texas Transplant’s Position was Cut just as She was Settling into her New York job, But it Actually Opened up her Options.

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When I moved to New York city to take a job as a creative director in 2014, I was ecstatic. After purging at least 70% of my belongings, I happily traded shoe-melting Dallas summers for eyelash-freezing New York winters.

Free- Lighthouse on Cloudy Weather

It was the first time I’d lived anywhere outside of Texas, so adjusting to my new home and the unsettling lack of Tex-Mex took longer than expected. Then, just about the time I started to feel settled into my new city, I got laid off. Here’s what it taught me.

GETTING ACQUAINTED WITH UNEMPLOYMENT

The first two weeks of unemployment were the worst. I hadn’t had time to build a New York–based professional network anywhere near the size of the one I’d had in Dallas. Despite that, I still managed to get enough support to update my portfolio, survive a nasty fight with depression and anxiety, and land a freelance gig as a creative director.

Some of my ad-industry buddies insist that freelancing in New York is the only way to go. There are tons of opportunities, and you can make a ton of money doing it if you can stomach inconsistent gigs (which I cannot) and if you love networking (which I do not): I need to know exactly how much my next check is going to be and when I’m going to get it. And the thought of saying things like, “Lemme shoot you my contact info so we can have a convo about those opps!” to multiple cocktail-holding industry strangers makes me want to run screaming into a busy intersection.

 

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Luckily, the contract I took was a solid one-month commitment that, thanks to following my favorite four-word rule, turned into two months and, eventually, a full-time offer. The freelance opportunity helped me with so much more than paying rent. I made amazing new connections, got a fresh (and desperately needed) boost of self-esteem, and had the chance I needed to decide what I really wanted to be doing and where I wanted to do it.

Feeling like this particular full-time job just wasn’t right for me, I declined the offer. But with my newfound confidence I decided to try to find that perfect fit—and, like most things in life, it played out a bit differently than I’d imagined it would.

LOCATION, VOCATION, LOCATION

It’s always easier to find a new job when you have one. Negotiating for a better salary, title, and benefits doesn’t work nearly as well when you’re making $0, your title is “unemployed,” and the only benefit you have is being able to send emails from your phone in bed all day. During my new agency contract, I had the luxury of investigating alternative options, knowing the freelance gig could turn into a full-time gig if I wanted it.

Because I wasn’t afraid of unemployment anymore, I had the confidence to ask tough questions that I knew might make people uncomfortable (calling out bad reviews from former employees, for example). I countered existing job descriptions with the ones I actually wanted. I developed proposals around the salary band I thought I deserved based on market research and help from recruiter friends, and used facts and figures to push for it.

I began turning interviewers into interviewees, asking them questions about their company’s vision of the future, and determining whether I wanted to be part of it. I focused less on getting in with the big-name agencies and more on finding a spot that felt like the best fit for me.

“NEW YORK I LOVE YOU, BUT YOU’RE BRINGING ME DOWN”

Back when I only visited New York for business trips, I saw the city as a magical wonderland of art, theater, and intense connections. But as a resident, I saw it as a crowded, angry place that taught me to keep my head down, walk fast, and stay guarded. On the one hand, that was disappointing. On the other, it piqued my curiosity about places I’d previously dismissed.

A native Texan, I spent my formative years in Dallas devouring queso, chugging sweet tea, and enjoying the fact that 90% of my family lived within an hour radius of me. As a 15-month Brooklyn resident, I’d captured hundreds of short stories inspired by people on my subway commute, discovered the value of weatherproof boots, and tapped into an energy unlike any I’d experienced before.

Now I had a chance to try something completely different. New sights. New stories. New people. And the way that thought got my heart pumping was enough to counteract the dread of packing and moving once again.

Eventually, I got a call from an interested Seattle-based recruiter. Had I received it prior to my New York adventure, I likely would’ve turned down the opportunity. But because I already knew the excitement a cross-country move could offer, I was open to the idea.

I found what turned out to be the perfect fit: an agency I’d never heard of in a city I never thought I’d live in. Through two months of deep, honest conversations with everyone from the recruiter to the CEO, I’d found a place where I felt I could make a difference.

Was I terrified about packing up and moving across the country yet again? Absolutely. Would I want it any other way? No way. Being scared is always better than being stuck.

 

FastCompany.com | KATE KEMP, MONSTER |  07.13.16 

Your #Career : Pro Tips for Getting into a Great MBA Program from a Consultant Who Charges Thousands of Dollars for Advice…Remember that EVERYTHING Counts — Every Interaction or Lack of Interaction with your Target Schools will be Considered. Be Sure to Manage your Entire Process with Professionalism.

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It’s less than two months to go until the round-one deadline at the country’s top MBA program.  Harvard Business School (HBS) has the earliest application deadline with round-one applications for Fall 2017 entry due on September 7.

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Business Insider caught up with Stacy Blackman, the CEO of aleading MBA-admissions advisoryfirm, to get some advice on how applicants can get into the program of their dreams.

With the GMAT, application, essays, references, and interviews, it can be a pretty daunting process.

Here Blackman reveals her top tips for MBA applicants on how to stay ahead:

Research all types of programs.

Business schools are changing leadership, revamping programs and reinventing themselves. International programs are blooming and there is an option for everyone. Do your research to determine what is best for you. Applicants should visit campuses and speak with faculty, current students and former students to determine if a particular school is the right place for them.

Consider taking the GRE.

More and more schools are accepting this in lieu of the GMAT, and since GRE scores are not currently reported out, schools may be more likely to take a risk on a low GRE score.

 

Choose your references wisely.

Choose your references wisely.

Just because you passed JP Morgan CEO Jamie Dimon in the lobby once, doesn’t mean he is qualified to write your rec.JPMorgan Chase shareholder letter

Choose a recommender for the MBA applications who knows you well and is supportive of your application, as opposed to a prestigious “name” who has little insight into your personality and skills.

Many applicants treat recommendations as a “drop-off-and-forget” part of an application or ask the wrong person to participate. An applicant should select a person who knows them personally and then share his or her essays and other information, to help them best support the applicant in a recommendation.

 

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Use fresh eyes.

Engage the help of a “reviewer” to review the B-school application. Even when not working with a consultant, a friend or a colleague can provide a fresh perspective on an application. Leave time to incorporate their feedback.

Having too many people review and comment on an application, however, is a mistake. Applicants should pick a few trusted advisers and work with them, or their essay could be become a watered-down “essay by committee” and show less about them as an individual.

Show leadership.

Choose to highlight stories that demonstrate leadership and impact, as opposed to simple involvement. Stories can come from work or any number of experiences outside of work.

Be real.

Don’t hide failures and mistakes. Provide an explanation and lessons learned, using these experiences to demonstrate resilience, growth, and self-awareness. Failing to address obvious weaknesses, such as low test scores or a blemish on your academic record, is a mistake many applicants make.

No one is perfect, and admissions officers often are interested in what an applicant learned from a mistake. If an applicant does not proactively explain, admissions officers will come to their own conclusions.

Discuss the why.

Discuss the WHY behind your stories, not just the WHAT. Why you did certain things or made certain choices is much more interesting and will help the admissions committee get to know the real you.

Practice out loud.

Prepare thoroughly for the in-person admissions interview, including practicing out loud.

Anticipate questions, and practice. Many elite business schools are also introducing the online video essay, where applicants have 60 seconds to answer a question via video.

Be professional from beginning to end.

Remember that EVERYTHING counts — every interaction or lack of interaction with your target schools will be considered. Be sure to manage your entire process with professionalism.

Specialize.

Don’t wear too many hats. Admissions officers sometimes wonder how applicants have time to develop a PowerPoint presentation in between the oil painting, tutoring, skiing, sky diving, Farsi speaking, flower arranging, foreign-film watching, blogging, environment saving, meal delivering, judo-ing, and overseas traveling he or she “supposedly” engages in every week.

MBA programs want a well-rounded class made up of specialists – emphasize a couple important aspects of your background rather than trying to be master of everything. Good admissions officers can spot a fake a mile off. It’s important that an applicant show his or her true self.

 

Businessinsider.com | July 16, 2016 | 

 

 

#Leadership : Team Building; 5 Understandable Reasons Why Your Co-workers Are on Your Nerves…We, in General, Tend to Attribute our Actions as the Cause for other Events or Reactions Happening. Often This is Not the Case.

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While we all have good days and bad days, some people seem to be more difficult on a regular basis than others.

Free- Stones stacked on each other

Sometimes this seems to just be who they are from a personality point of view. They have a rather negative mindset. They’re grumpy. They don’t smile much and just have a dark cloud that follows them around. Then there are others, who recently seem more touchy and easily offended than they usually are. Their moodiness can be confusing to others and offensive as well.

As a psychologist, I tend to notice how many people attribute others’ behavior and reactions (or even general life events) to their own actions. That is, we, in general, tend to attribute our actions as the cause for other events or reactions happening. Often this is not the case.

Instead, frame your response in the sense of “It seems…” or “I’ve noticed…,” which makes your comment a bit softer. Then ask a question that communicates your concern for them, such as “Are you okay?”

In fact, there is fairly good research showing that people tend to over attribute their influence on the world around them and even their own lives. By the way, this is the basis of superstitions – developing a habit of wearing the same shirt, jeans and sitting in the same place that you did when your team won a big game, hoping it will bring luck, and they’ll win again.

While I’m usually an advocate for individuals taking a look at their own behavior and accepting responsibility for their actions, in this case, I actually believe it’s best to put ourselves and our actions at the back of the line with regards to the potential reasons why our co-workers may seem prickly and easily offended.

Here are some alternative reasons to explore why your colleague may seem rather testy and annoyed.

1. They may not feel well.
Often people become surlier when they don’t feel well physically. This can come from lack of sleep, a medical issue they’re dealing with or chronic pain. It may be that they have started to struggle with migraines, lower back pain or some other issue. Many employees don’t talk about how they feel physically; and so, those of us around them don’t really know that they don’t feel well.

 

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2. They may have issues going on in their personal life.

When we are dealing with stressful issues in our life, the emotional resources demanded to deal with these issues is significant, and we get worn out. Again, many people won’t share their personal issues; especially, if they are not asked about them. So there may be something going on in the background of your colleague’s life that you don’t know about.

This could include relationship difficulties, struggles with their children or adolescents, financial pressures or extended family issues. When we feel pressed in our personal life, many of us become more annoyed at work in response to what would otherwise be a normal demand.

3. They may feel anxious or fearful.
Irritability, a mild form of being angry or upset, can be a cover for other underlying thoughts and emotions. In our culture, many people have been taught – either directly or indirectly — that it’s not appropriate to express negative feelings. Therefore, they try to keep those feelings inside. Two of these common feelings is anxiety and fear. Our culture has shaped most of us to believe that it’s not acceptable to be anxious or fearful. Therefore, we tend to suppress our feelings, and the anxiety is expressed through being prickly and grouchy in response to other people.

4. They may be frustrated.
Sometimes people become crabby when they’re frustrated either with their life, their job or some specific issue going on at work. Frustrated is an interesting word because it is used in two different ways in our culture.

In many settings, when someone is frustrated, it is a nice way of saying they are a little bit angry. The other meaning of frustrated is to feel blocked – like you can’t reach the goal you are trying to achieve. Frustration can lead us to negatively react to any situation, regardless of whether it’s directly related to the issue about which we are frustrated. That is, we react in a quick-tempered manner to a situation that’s not directly related to what we are frustrated about.

5. They may not feel valued.
When employees don’t feel valued, either by their supervisor, management or their colleagues, a common response is for them to become increasingly irritable, moody and easily offended. One type of frustration is when we believe our colleagues should value what we do and contribute, but we don’t seem to hear much positive feedback.

In our work with the 5 Languages of Appreciation, we help individuals identify their primary language of appreciation; that is, the way in which they prefer to receive appreciation. Interestingly, we also found that employees are most easily offended when a message is sent – unintentionally — via their primary language that hurts them in some way.

For example, people who value verbal praise are also quite sensitive to any critique or criticism. And those who value quality time are easily offended when they feel left out.

How should you respond?
While it is helpful to know possible reasons for the surliness of your colleagues, the question remains: What should I do?

A helpful response may be: I’ve noticed that you seem somewhat more easily annoyed recently. Are you okay? Is there anything going on that would be helpful for me to know about?

Conversely, it is not helpful to be accusatory or speak in a factual tone of voice, saying something like: You have been incredibly grouchy lately. What’s up with that?

Instead, frame your response in the sense of “It seems…” or “I’ve noticed…,” which makes your comment a bit softer. Then ask a question that communicates your concern for them, such as “Are you okay?”

Be forewarned, you may or may not get a positive response – especially immediately. Try not to react in a defensive or antagonistic way. In fact, what often happens is a colleague will come back to you later and explain what’s going on after they have thought about your inquiry and concern for them.

 

Entrepreneur.com  | July 15, 2016 | Paul White, Psychologist, Speaker, Trainer